Miserable 1St Tirmester with 2Nd Child

Updated on July 14, 2010
S.R. asks from Santa Clara, CA
23 answers

I am currently 9.5 weeks pregnant with my second child. When I was pregant the first time with my son my first trimester was problem free and I enjoyed being pregnant. This time around I'm so misberable. I'm nausous all day, doc gave me so meds that help a little, dizzy and lighthead, not sure if it's pregnancy or the Meniere's disease I have. Only seem to sleep about two hours at a time at night becasue I wake up to pee or am uncomfortable. Vomited for the first time last night. Have no appetite but I do eat something small each hour to help with the nausea. Am trying to keep my fluid intake up with ice water, ginger ale, apple juice. Went to ER two weeks ago to check for dehydration, I wasn't but felt great after a bag of V fluids. I do take one or two naps a day but that seems to make me feel worse. Mornings are usually better the afternoons are harder. I feel like a bad mom because it's hard to take care of my son. luckily he's in daycare three days a week. My husband is being supportive and very helpful as I'm not able to make dinner it just turns my stomach. I'm off for summer vacation so that is a blessing, just worried I'll still feel this way when I go back to teaching in August. I know that this won't last forever but I'm so sad, feel so alone and worry it won't get better. I just need some support and to know does it get better around 14 or 16 weeks. I'm supposed to be happy but I'm not yet. Any advice woun't be great. Thanks

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So What Happened?

Thank you for all the support. I'm taking it a day at a time. I'm now 10 weeks so hopefully only 3-4 more weeks. I'm also going to try acupuncture. Trying to stay positive and have a nice summer. Thanks ladies.

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M.B.

answers from Dallas on

I had an AWFUL pregnancy. First trimester, especially. You're right, that most people feel better after the first trimester. I could hardly eat anything the first trimester. A lifesaver for me...watermelon. I think we bought the entire store of watermelon. It was refreshing, easy to digest, and helped ease my nausea. I also sucked on peppermint Altoids, drank peppermint tea with honey, and drank coconut water. Coconut water has lots of electrolytes and my stomach did great with it. I recommend O.N.E coconut water, I personally think it tastes the best. Water made me feel incredibly sick the first trimester, so I drank a lot o coconut water. It is very hydrating and has a lot of vitamins. Good luck and I hope you feel better soon!!

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W.R.

answers from Norfolk on

Hi! I don't know that I have any great advice, but I am going through something similar. My daughter is 2 and I don't remember feeling this bad with her. I was so tired for a few weeks that every time she asked to do anything I told her I was too tired and I felt so guilty about it. I've been letting her watch way too much tv because I can lie down while she watches. I've also found pbskids.org that has some games she can do on the computer which keeps her busy for a while and I can relax in the chair while she plays.

I've found that multigrain crackers, goldfish crackers, ginger ale, coke, and (weird) green beans help the nausea for me. I am also feeling very sad but I assume it's hormones - not that that really helps, but I am hoping it will all get better in the second trimester. I have heard that it is supposed to. Hopefully we can both just hang in there and it will be better in a month or so!

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S.H.

answers from Honolulu on

I had mega morning sickness, vomiting, AND migraines with both my pregnancies. ALL day.
The ONLY thing that helped me, and which my OB/GYN suggested, was Acupuncture.

Just one 1/2 hour session, was all it took.
It does not hurt and is actually very relaxing.
I really recommend it.
Of course with a practitioner that knows how to treat Pregnant women.

all the best,
Susan

2 moms found this helpful

A.R.

answers from Houston on

My husband and I were having a similar chat last night after I bit his head off for no reason. He has started singing me a version of "I'm so blue" only it's "I'm so green." Very nice through the bathroom door. Honestly I am through my first trimester and I am still waiting to feel glowing and pregnant instead of constantly sick. I don't have any words of encouragement other than hang in there and try to stay upbeat and positive which is challenging on really tough days. Good luck and lots of hugs.

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J.R.

answers from San Francisco on

Hi, I'm so sorry I know exactly how you feel. I had Hypermesis Gravidarum which meant I was sick non stop for the whole 9 months! I couldn't be near food, or any strong smells really.

I suggest having a comfortable nook somewhere, napping made me worse too so I just read, played on my computer, drew, anything to keep my mind off things. I couldn't stand to do my work so I found other ways around it to keep going.

things I can recommend to help. carry ziplock bags everywhere you go, it minimizes your embarrassment if you have something on hand to throw up into and they seal really well. the other is to take your meds. I couldn't even drink water some days so I would have to grit my teeth and reswallow. but the drugs build up in your system and work better and better so keep taking them! there are a few different ones so if they don't work talk to your doctor. if you find something that sounds good to eat eat it! even if you only have the same thing night after night. I could only eat about 3 things. eat straight away and keep things on hand that are bland.

now the ray of hope! rest assured that I lost more weight than most women gain in pregnancy and my little girl was perfect :) I am sure it will get better for you, it's very rare it continues past week 22. good luck!

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H.B.

answers from Chicago on

I'm on my third. I didn't throw up, but I had the nausea, dizziness and no appetite. I felt better some time around 15-20 weeks. I could eat, but easily filled up. Around 30 weeks my appetite has slowly come back to normal. It could also be the summer heat. From 15-30 weeks all I wanted was water and ice.

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S.S.

answers from New York on

I am aslo pregnant with my second child . This time I feel more nauseous and sometimes dizzy. i dont feel like eating much ,feel like having chilled yogurt or fruits most of the time. I think its because of heat and running around a 2 yr old thru out the day . This time around I dont feel pregnant that much like I used to feel during firts pregnancy - i am guessing cd be because that was first time :)
Second trimester is about to start so hoping to feel better.
Just hang in there and have a wonderful pregnancy.

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J.P.

answers from Austin on

If it makes you feel any better I was sick for the entire pregnancy with my first. There wasn't a day that I didn't puke and if I puked only once I considered it to be a good day =)

I am 18 wks along with my second and I still feel nauseas throughout the day but at least I only puke once or twice a week so that makes me feel a little better. I'm definitely tired and feel very guilty for not being able to interact with my DD so I understand. When I have really bad days or hanging my head over the toilet I just tell myself that this little one better be healthy or I'm really going to be pissed - just joking =)

It is supposed to let up after the first trimester. It's only those few of us that have to suffer the entire time so hopefully you won't be one.

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S.H.

answers from New York on

I was sick through my 2nd pregnancy off and on the entire time. I was told it was because I had a girl they supposedly make you sicker. I doubt that is true but I did end up having a girl so who knows. I also have Meniere's and found that taking a cool shower first thing in the morning helped with the dizziness. I don't know why but it did. I also chewed on a lot of candied ginger and black licorice which both help with nausea. As for your emotional issues find someone you trust to talk to. So often people insist if you are pregnant you have to be blissfully happy all the time. I've written here before that I lost someone close to me early on in my 2nd pregnancy and grieving while pregnant is really hard. So many people would say "Oh well you have the baby coming so you aren't sad" which makes you automatically feel like you can't express that sadness. It's important to have someone whom you can trust not to judge you to talk to about how you feel. Hang in there and know you can always turn to the mom's here for a sensitive ear at the least. Good Luck!

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D.P.

answers from Raleigh on

I am 33 weeks and this pregnancy has been been a trial. Like you- my son was a breeze. I have found that half a tablet of Unisom and vitamin B6 worked much better than the prescription meds. Ask your doctor about it. I still have to take this every night to ward off the morning nausea that I would still get each morning if I didn't take it. I realize I am in the 10% of the women who have morning sickness that doesn't go away, but mine is predictable and occurs at the same time every day. I have learned to manage. You will too! Just hang in there and find something that works for you. For most women, morning sickness is gone my 14 weeks. BTW- This time I am having a girl which they say causes more morning sickness. Maybe this is true for you... :)

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Y.C.

answers from New York on

Are you taking prenatal vitamins? I took vitamins with my second baby and they made me so sick, I was nauseous all day and tired therefor no happy. I just stop taking those vitamins and I was feeling a lot better.
Also a body pillow help me a lot to rest.
Hold on in the cleaning of the house and rest even if you don't sleep and just spend time with your other kid, like reading him a book or watch a movie together.
And, it does will get better, think positive, and buy a funny pregnancy book.

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H.M.

answers from Detroit on

you are not alone! with my first i was sick the majority of the time. i couldn't even brush my teeth without puking. it was horrible. i am also 9.5 weeks! and have been sick since about 6 weeks. just this past weekend i started eating meat again. i couldn't go grocery shopping and walk through the meat dept without wanting to puke. i still have a little trouble actually cooking dinner. i wake up every 2 hrs at night to eat a snack so i'm so tired. today is the first day i actually feel pretty good. i'm getting sick of the same old snacks (cottage cheese, yogurt, granola bars) throughout the night. i guess i don't have any advice for you! just know that you are not alone. like a previous poster mentioned there is this conception that being pregnant is a wonderful time, though it is a wonderful, why do we have to feel so awful in the process!!

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E.M.

answers from Louisville on

I feel your pain with my first daughter i was so sick the whole pregnancy. I was actually on bed rest at home with IV fluids the whole time... not fun. with my second daughter i was sick the first tri. and that was it! each pregnancy is diff and you jsut have to learn what wont make you throw up. with my first daughter it was french bread... the only thing i could keep down most of the time.... couldnt even stomach pop sicles.good luck hope you get better soon

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M.E.

answers from San Francisco on

I had to respond since I'm 22 weeks and have just been through this. From week 6 - 12 I could barely keep anything down. I got very dehydrated and had to get IVs four times. I didn't want to eat anything (I tried) I lost about 14 lbs. and my doctor was getting nervous. Zofran (other meds. didn't work) really helped - at first it only helped me puke less, but after awhile I had much less nausea. I tried eating all the things that everyone suggested, but until the nausea lessened I either threw it up or it just didn't appeal to me. All I wanted to do was crawl under a rock and sleep - I felt terminally ill. At 12 weeks I noticed a little improvement, even more at 14 weeks (I'm pretty sure that's when I stopped taking Zofran) and since then I've been better and better. I still have an occasional 'pukey day,' but nothing like before. I gained back the weight SUPER fast and am on course to have a very healthy pregnancy. I wanted to tell you my story to give you some hope. I was about as sick as could be in the first trimester and now I'm back to work, taking care of my 2 year old and eating almost everything. I hope that you feel better very soon!!!!

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A.C.

answers from Cincinnati on

I had a very difficult first pregnancy with my son, very similar to what your are describing, and have been blessed with a relatively easy second pregnancy for my daughter, due in Sept. For me, things that helped were raw foods (fruits and vegetables), mint tea, and ginger tea. I couldn't stomach anything cooked, and mint and ginger can help with the nausea. Also, lollipops or fruit-based Popsicles can help.

A second note - don't discount the possibility that you are truly depressed. There has been a lot on the news recently about postpartum depression, but depression during pregnancy can also be a problem. In my experience, this is especially the case when it is a difficult pregnancy for whatever reason. I was very depressed during my first pregnancy - sick all the time, it was hard to move around, I couldn't do things I always wanted to do. By the time I started to feel better in the second trimester, my mood had kind of been set. If you notice that things don't improve when you physically feel better, please talk to your doctor about the possibility that you are depressed.

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J.B.

answers from Atlanta on

Don't beat yourself up because you're not happy and you feel bad! I felt AWFUL for the entire time of my two pregnancies. I can't tell you how much I had to psych myself up for the 2nd one! I hate being pregnant -hated it the whole time and wouldn't do it again for anything! See -it's okay! I have two fantastic, beautiful boys who were totally worth it, but they were miserable to get here. I got away with as little as possible with my first while carrying my 2nd. I was sooooooooo tired all the time and queasy -I let him watch way too many cartoons, movies on DVD and would foist him off on just about anyone trustworthy for as long as they would take him. We all survived and no one is damaged because of it. I didn't cook at all while pregnant. I could barely stand to buy groceries. I worked during my first pregancy and dragged myself there every day.

So -what I'm saying is unfortunately you may not feel a whole lot better later, but maybe you will -many women do. This too shall pass and then you never have to do it again if you don't want to! Just get by the best you can -you're other child will be okay and your job will be okay too. I used to teach, and it's HARD, but they'll have to understand that you need to sit instead of stand and you may not be quite as interactive as you normally would be. You'll make it!

OH -get some Seabands at the drugstore! They're to wear for motion sickness and place light pressure on points on your wrist. They actually helped me (but they are ugly).

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K.B.

answers from San Francisco on

echoing the prenatal vitamins -- take them at night.

it'll be over before you know it, hang in there!

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D.P.

answers from Pittsburgh on

I've always heard that those symptoms disappear the day you're done with the 1st Trimester....keeping my fingers crossed for you that better days are coming!

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C.B.

answers from Detroit on

My first 2, I barely felt sick,. My 3rd one was horrible. I tried everything to ease the morning sickness (or all day sickness was more like it). Nothing seemed to work. Everyone told me to give it til 14 weeks, which seemed like forever till it got there. I did not believe them. I felt so sick even still at 13 weeks. I was sure it was going to last the whole pregnancy. It was unbelievable, it was almost like over night, at 14 weeks, I felt 1000 times better. The only thing that helped me was to remember how fast it really does go by even if it was to last longer. PS, my first 2 were boys, 3rd is a girl, so will be interesting if that has anything to do with it for you.

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K.S.

answers from Sacramento on

I was sick for my entire first pregnancy, but things did get better around week 13. The first trimester was the worst, I spent two weeks solid in bed and then had to go back to work, but could only make it about halftime. After the first trimester ended I did begin to feel better and would usually just start off the morning by throwing up and then be able to make it through the day. I had food aversions the entire time, I think I largely survived on fresh fruit and crackers. On the plus side, I now have a very healthy little boy and barely gained the minimum 25 pounds recommended. One thing that did help was taking prenatal vitamins without iron (or maybe I just took regular iron-free vitamins, can't remember if they make prenatal ones without). Fortunately anemia didn't set in until my final week of pregnancy.

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B.S.

answers from San Francisco on

I've been through two horrible pregnancies (vomiting for the entire 9 months, no sleep, shaking, headaches, highly sensitive to smells, had to be on IV, etc.). None of the medications worked and I absolutely could not function during my first pregnancy. After my first experience, I was determined to do something different the second time around. Even though I had never tried accupuncture before, someone recommended a licensed medical doctor who also specialized in accupuncture and she had lots of experience working with pregnant women. After several weeks of treatment, my symptions, although not completely gone, was bearable and allowed me to function as a human being again and not affect me on the job. Good luck!

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C.R.

answers from San Francisco on

Don't despair, it will get better. I was in your boat the second time around- so sick and unable to do all the things you discussed. It went away at 16 weeks and the second trimester was great. I suggest acupuncture to help you get through the next weeks. Herbs also helped somewhat. Good luck, there's light at the end of the tunnel!

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J.W.

answers from Sacramento on

I just finished my 1st trimester of my second pregnancy after having a son. It was nearly the same just more vomiting. I vomited every night all most for two and half months. I felt just as crappy. My midwife suggested B-6 injections at the last three week and what a difference. But when the last week of my 1st trimester was in sight my dinner was able to stay down and food was not a problem anymore. I survived with a gingerale bottle clutched in one hand and a big box of saltines in the other. You have a little less than a month until the 2nd trimester. Hang in there. Soon you will be feeling better, and the baby playing kickball. And once you feel that sweet little baby moving around every last minute of suffering will be worth it. Good Luck and congratulations!

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