My 2 Yr Old and 5 Yr Old Won't Sleep in Their Own Beds

I have a 3yr old boy and was having a similar problem. He is afraid of the dark, so his bedroom light stays on. He was coming into my bed in the middle of the night. I got a calendar for his room and little star stickers. Every night that he sleeps in his- which means he doesn't wake up and crawl into my bed at all- he earns a star. Once he has 5 stars we can go to Cal Skate, Scandia etc.. I have been doing this since the end of January and it has worked really well. At most he comes into my bed 2x a week. Since he's been doing so well I have upped the requirement to 10 stars in order to get to go somewhere fun. Hope this helps.

Hi Q., you dont mentioned how long this been going on...but try this, it may take more than a couple of weeks (or months), but believe me it works. Instead of they (your kids) coming over to your room, why dont you sleep over in their room? Let them know how nice it feels to sleep in that room.You need your rest, you are a full time teacher and an over time mom, I know because I am a single mom too. When your children dont sleep with you it does not affect the bonding between you. I am latino and never spent one nigth sleeping with my parents, I have a healthy relationship with both my parents, so dont be afraid, they need their own space and you too. Let me know what happens. Good luck.

Hi there Q..Well where can i start to give u any advice on this subject. I have a 8yrs and 10yrs old right now ( girls) and they both slept in my bed for the longest time possible. The way i handled the situation was that i put their beds in my room and told them that i was right there for them in the night if ever they wanted any thing, this went on for 4 yrs.They would roll on my bed in the night and the younger one would even kick me.I looked like i was in ZOMBIE LAND all the time. Finally when my youngest one went into the 2nd grade did she realized that all her friends had their own beds and bedrooms. So now they both sleep in their own rooms in their own beds.The other thing that you can try is that you can tell your 5yrs old to behave like the older sibling and look after the younger one in the night. See if this works. Let the 5yrs old be in charge. Maybe the younger one will feel safer with the 5yrs old.
L.

My five year old was doing the same thing. He would come to my bed and kick me, fall asleep between my legs and I would always end up leaving him in bed with my husband and going to his room. Now he sleeps withhis siter who is 3. They either sleep together in his twin bed or he sleeps on her florr next to her bed. He rearely ever wakes up and comes to our room anymore. He has even gotten up and helped her when she had a bad dream and one time helped clean her up and strip her bed when she had an accident. They didn't even tell us until the next morning! Good luck..

I personally am an advocate for children sleeping in bed with their parents. My husband and I both love having our babies cuddled in between us. I think it all has to do with making bed time a safe and secure and when they decide for themselves that it is safe, they will make the desicion on their own to sleep in their own beds. I say let them start out the night in their own beds and when they come and crawl into bed, just continue to sleep. Both you and your kids will get more sleep that way. I recommend going to www.askdrsears.com and seeing what info you dig up on sleeping with children. The bond that you will develop with your children will be amazing and you may even find yourself sad when they decide to leave your bed!!

I have an 11 year old and a 2 year old. The older child never slept with me as a single mother, he always had his own bed, etc. The younger child has slept in our bed since he was 6 months old. Keep in mind, different cultures have different customs. I am white and my husband is Chinese. I had a hard time dealing with the idea of my child sleeping in my bed, in my culture that is unheard of, in his culture it is very common. I then did some research and have even noticed in my own family what I found was true. My parents never allowed us to sleep in their bed. My family and I do not have a very strong bond. On the other hand, my husbands family have all slept in their parents beds, etc. Their bond is incredible. Research has even proven that children who sleep in their parents beds have a stronger bond, will be more motivated in school work and will have all the skills necessary for employment and their future family. I am not saying that your children will not have these skills if they do not sleep in your bed. You are dealing with an attachment security issue. A solution, what I have done in my own home, I was not getting a good night rest, either, so I moved my younger son's bed and placed it next to ours. He sleeps in it and we all get a good nights rest. So before you "throw" your children out, its really about bonding and security. Make adjustments to your room to include them in and forget about what people say. My parents are furious my little guy sleeps in our room. All children will eventually want their "own" space. I hope this helps!

It is hard having children sleep in your bed, especially 2. My 5 yr old has slept with us since birth. I sleept in my parents bed until I was 7!!! I know it was hard for my parents to sleep. My mom started having me bring my blanket and pillow with me and I had to sleep on the floor next to her bed. I soon figured out I was sleeping on a floor when I had a perfectly beautiful bed in my room. I never slept with them again!

I have the same problem.

My daughter who isnow 8 slept with me until she was about 5- same thing everyone sort of looked down on it- but she made her own decision one day and that was it- she is so secure sleeping on her own- I remember things that I was scared of as a kid and none of them affect her- she stays in her room! I do believe it creates better bonds and enhances them as people. I really do see a difference in my kids and kids that were forced to sleep alone- some kids will do it gladly but if they don't I'm not the type to force it. BUT I am a single mom so I don't have a husband complaining about it- I can understand missing out on that alone time so you might have to send them to grandma's on occasion or have some nooners. My 4 year old still sleeps with me- there are times where it is annoying- times where I can't get up with out her jumping up- but eventually it will pass. I do have a secert envy though for those parents who had the strength to let baby cry it out and sleep on their own- I just could never ever do it and I do think it is good for them in a lot of ways to have the securty of being with you- it's definately not a bad thing- my kids are wonderful peopleand we are very close.