Opening Presents at a Birthday Party

I wouldn''t have said anything, but don't have him around again. My own sister is like this with her son and if you say anything to her about her son's behavior, be prepared for a battle!
Any responsible parent would KNOW this behavior of a child that age is unacceptable so if they didn't correct the issue on their own, then they would more than likely be offended by you pointing it out so you did the right thing being patient and toughing it out for you son during the party. Yes it's a b-day party which is an exciting event but it sounds like he was pretty out of control. There's no reason you have to keep having this child around if he behaves that way since it stresses you out so much. Do yourself a favor and unless you see a change in his behavior (or the parents responsibility for his actions) then simply don't have him over anymore, there's no reason you should feel obligated to have your child play with him just because he's your husbands friends child. Your son may pick up on this bad behavior, assume it's ok to act that way and be the next one out of control at a bday party which you don't want! Good luck to you.

Honestly, we have stopped opening presents in front of everyone during the party for this reason. It's a lot of pressure on the birthday kid because everyone is focused on them and, yes, the kiddos do get excited and crowd them to see. Then, what happens is that when they open one present, they want to take it out of the box and play with it right then instead of opening the rest. So, then you have to tell them that they can't play with it yet and have to keep opening. Anyway, it didn't seem like much fun, so we just thank everyone, give them the treat bags and open the gifts later when everyone is gone. That way, the kid can open the presents at leisure and play with them one at a time without 30 sets of eyes on them. Much more fun and less stress for me too! Most of my friends do this as well, so nobody seems to be offended by it. Anyway, that would be my suggestion for next time.

As far as the unruly kid....if the parents aren't doing anything about the behavior, then I would have said something. Sometimes, all it takes is them seeing you reprimanding their child (politely and with respect, of course) to kick them into gear. I would have taken the gift from the child and said "that's _____'s gift, not yours. Please let him open his own gifts". I have rules in my home and I don't let anyone's kid break them whether the parents are there or not. I just ask them politely not to continue the behavior and if they don't listen, then I ask the parent to step in (sometimes parents are clueless or busy talking to other people and aren't paying any attention to their kid). If the parent isn't there and I am babysitting, then I use timeout like I would with my own kid. I don't allow kids to come into my home and do whatever they want (i.e. destroying things and generally not following directions). I think in this situation, the parents were probably just busy socializing and weren't watching their kid all that closely. I think, at some point, I would have approached the parents and told them what their kid was up to and asked them to keep a closer eye on him. I would have said something like "I just found little Johnny upstairs. The baby is sleeping up there, so I really need all of the kids to stay down here." Again, this just reiterates to them that they need to keep a closer eye on their kid.

Good luck! I hope you are able to find a solution that works for you and your family.

we always did the presents and cake at the table (didn't matter if it was inside our out) put the birthday boy at one end of the table and then surround him with yourself and your husband and make a barrier. it stops the others from jumping in. usually there will be another parent or older child who can handle it if your taking photo's. but you won't get away from kids being excited. meeting at a playground is a good idea. could be the other child was just over excited. it happens at birthday parties

I think your suggestion of meeting at a public place for future get togethers is perfect. And I would limit them if you really think this boy is not well-behaved. If he really got on your nerves, you aren't obligated to invite him to your son's birthday party going forward. You can put a little distance between your son and this friend by often being "busy" Good luck!

Some children are just more high strung than others. Try to loosen up and relax. Was it bothering your son as much as it bothered you? Perhaps you want the perfect birthday party for your son, an he just wants to play?
If the child is being destructive or going in an off limits area then you take him by the hand and bring him to his mother. Then you tell the mother in front of him something like, "Jimmy was going upstairs which he knows is an off limits area. So I brought him to you." or "Jimmy was unwrapping brad's presents so I brought him to you." The key is just to inform the mom of the behavior and let her deal with it. Don't say it rudely or judgmentally, just matter of fact, like you are trying to be helpful.

I understand where you are coming from, you wanted the party to go perfect for your son, who wouldn't it's a very special day! But as you've found out, things don't always go that way, and it's easy for someone to tell you what to say or do when they weren't in your very situation. Everyone "wants" to say this or that to the kid or the parents but in that peticular situation, I know it's easier said then done. You want to be the nice fun host, not someone going around putting kids in time outs or having to get the parents attention to watch their own kid, whom they should have been watching from the beginning.

I've been in your shoes and it's funny because I don't ever remember kids behaving this way when I was a kid. I remember birthday guests sitting around watching me open presents and keeping their hands to themselves so maybe you remember your parties being this way and haven't learned how to handle to "out of control" ones at your own childs party just yet. I know it's frusturating, you WANT more than anything for the PARENTS to speak up but that of course doesn't always happen, Nattalie O. had a good point, if the parents KNEW their child was misbehaving, more than likely they would have done something already and since they didn't it's better to keep your cool and try your best to enjoy the moment and remember not every party will be this way.

I've caught my own daughter grabbing her cousins presents and trying to take off with them BUT I quickly caught her and told her "no, no that's your cousins new toy and we should let him decide if you can play with it". There's no need for party guests to think they have rights to all of the gifts, that's what party favors/goody bags are for! At least that was always my favorite part about going to b-day parties, I never thought for one second I had the right to another ones gifts. One thing I've learned that worked over the years was to have hubby quickly put the gifts away and get the kids on to the next exciting event of the party. If you have the party outside of the home, bring a large trash bag and bag up the gifts right after opening and have hubby bring them out to the car.

It's much easier having some sort of plan ahead of time so you're not having to stress over out of control kids or irresponsible parents and keep in mind, not every party is going to go perfect but every year you will have another chance to have a great party and enjoy every moment of it that you can, they grow up so fast! Take care and hang in there, hope you enjoyed what you could have!

I'd say don't have it at your house.