Posts Being Erased but the Replies remain....Rude?

Frankly, who knows why some people delete their post.
Frankly, I don't analyze it and don't care.
It could be for reasons which we don't know.
Besides anything obvious.

If someone wants to delete their post but cannot, what other choice do they have but to erase? Its there prerogative. I have better things to do than wonder what some random stranger had to ask, or why they felt the need to remove it. There are many reasons why a person may want to "delete". I trust they made the right decision for themselves, even if it irritates others.

I used to think it was rude, but now I don't mind. In fact, after the great MMP-Facebook sharing scandal, I deleted most of my posts, to keep them from being linked on FB.

ETA: I have nothing at all to be ashamed about with any of my questions, but I do get very detailed in some of my explanations (especially if something is about my in-laws and I know I have a pretty unique background when combined with my husband's ethnic background, etc). I am deleting to keep this forum as anonymous as possible.

ETA2: I know that MMP keeps an electronic record of everything, and that is fine with me. But, they aren't going to go back and re-insert all my original words to my posts, and then post it to FB. The links they post in FB are to the current forms of the questions, not to the original.

Hi L.. I know that some people stalk off when they don't get the answers they want, but there are other reasons for deleting a question. Unless I'm sure that being angry with the answers is the reason, I don't see it as rude.

Some people say that a question needs to stay up for folks to go back and find. Well, MP's search bar is not very helpful, and if a subject line isn't very specific, it won't help anyway. Plus, no one here "owes" anyone else leaving a question up on the chance that someone a year down the line will want to read it.

Some people don't want family or friends to chance upon their computer history and realize that they've been written about in here. There are sensitive topics discussed here. They get what they need, ignore what they disagree with, and delete the question. There's plenty of merit in that.

After the MP/FB debacle a few weeks ago, it was crystal clear to me that ANY question on here could be fodder for MP to throw up on their FB page, along with "salesmanship" commentary, hyping their site. I don't blame anyone one little bit if they don't want their question thrown up there for people who are not part of this forum to see or comment on. I don't ask many questions here - that's not why I came to MP, to be honest, but I've already removed most of my questions because of what happened, and I'll remove any future ones as well. There's nothing wrong with my questions, mind you, but I guess it's my protest against what they are doing, which I consider to be abusive to their bread and butter - US. If it weren't for us writing here, they would have NO advertisers.

The amount of traffic here since that weekend has dropped a lot. People left the site, many changed their names and have changed their usage of this board. I doubt that MP cares one wit, as long as it doesn't affect their advertising.

MP didn't have so many trolls before they started linking to FB. Now it seems that we have them every weekend. Of course, that doesn't really have to do with the issue of deleting questions, but it's another part of the MP/FB issue.

Anyway, I don't blame anyone for deleting their questions once they've gotten what they want. Perhaps if everyone did it, MP would grudgingly start asking our PERMISSION before splashing threads on FB for all the world to see.

Hope that this gives you an alternative view of "bad manners" when it comes to deleted questions...

Half the time, I think people post just to hear they are right. When the answers don't support their position, they just run off. Sometimes, people share computers and don't want anyone to accidentally see what they write. Sometimes, people have writers remorse. Sometimes, people just do. Who knows why? Who cares? I don't think it's bad form, people have their reasons. It's not like having a conversation and hanging up on someone. People just don't want their words so accessible sometimes.

Out of all the things to worry about in the world, this is not something that is worth worrying over. Just my opinion, of course.

I've done this before, not on this forum, but on others. I do it to protect my privacy. For instance, I posted a question and gave some details that were necessary, and I got some advice (also some snotty comments and I'm sure they though I deleted it because I didn't like what they said, but that wasn't the case, I eyeroll jerk comments and move on). Then, after I was satisfied that I got what I needed I didn't feel the need to leave my post out there for all eternity with details that were personal and might some day come back to me in some unforeseen way.

I just consider it cleaning up after myself on the internet, most of the time I don't care, but sometimes I feel better knowing my post is no longer out there to pop up on google for people for years to come.

Everyone has the right to erase their posts at will. I don't really see it as bad manners. Perhaps those people regret what they posted when they realize that it may hurt someone they actually know, which definitely comes before worrying about the feelings of unknown people on the internet.

Well, I went back and deleted many of the questions I had posted that would have given away anything about me that makes me less anonymous. I don't view it as rude or childish, just wanting to be sure that MP has no use for me on their FB page. If I wanted to post my queries on FB, I would.
I have asked some sensitive and specific questions. One question wouldn't "give me away", but you look up my profile, my previous questions, and start putting two and two together, and someone who knew me could figure it out.
I ask things on here because I need the opinion without the drama that goes with asking family or friends. I surely don't want family or friends "figuring me out", and maybe getting hurt feelings or getting mad.

Here's my take.

Some people take their answers and run.
Some people don't like the answers and delete the post.
Some people are afraid for their privacy, especially with Mamapedia taking our questions and posting them on FB.

IMO, if I am that afraid of what I post, I don't post it. I am not entirely anonymous and I'm sure that someone who knows me and my kids could figure me out. If it is too personal, then I need to be calling up a friend and not posting online. Nothing posted is 100% private. Anywhere.

If I post a question, I may not like all the answers, but deleting my question only makes me look like I wasn't wearing my big girl panties.

If I realize that someone is a serial deleter, I stop responding. It's a waste of my time.

I just wanted to publicly throw a shout out over to Doris Day and her answer, because she said it better than I could.
There have been a number of questions I have gone back and deleted. I have done so maybe a few weeks (or later) after I have asked them and have had plenty of time to process the answers and take offered advice. I have done this because I feel that if someone I knew in real life read those questions, it would cause a problem.

It used to bother me, too, but I've come to realize that are multiple valid reasons for doing it (some reasons better than others I suppose).

Who knows, really? My guess is most questions are deleted because the asker didn't like the answers they received.

As far as for privacy concerns, what privacy? Once you put something out in a question or answer here or anywhere (FB, other forums, blogs, etc.), what you said is on the web to stay, EVEN if you then delete it here or elsewhere. I know this for a fact because after reading an article stating just that about 1.5 years ago I Googled myself and found myself under my real name. Then I Googled "GrammaRocks" and found tons more that I've put out there over the years, even things I thought I'd deleted (not here.) I use "GrammaRocks" primarily on different sites, and have changed or added to answers, and have found the original AND subsequent answers or comments on the web. I checked my son's name and one of my granddaughters, same thing. The thing is, each post or comment you make is put on the web separately, so even though you think you deleted it, that original post and your "deleted" one is still there to be seen, for anyone with the time and inclination to search for it. Watching what you put on the internet is important advice for everyone, you just can't "take it back."

Sometimes I'm frustrated because it makes me even more curious about what their post was about! And perhaps they became upset that they were being slammed or even just not receiving the responses and/or support they were looking for. I feel like it's their choice, and I don't mind.

What I think is worse is when an early responder to the post assumes that the question might be deleted, and cuts and pastes it into a reply (which can't be deleted except maybe by the other responder) so that it has to remain up. That is what seems mean and immature. And a little sinister. That's way worse IMO.

My opinion? People delete when they post thinking everyone will agree with them or support their view and they get mad when 90% of the posts tell them they are over reacting or are the one in the wrong. I do find it annoying when people delete just because people don't agree with them. I myself recently had a post where many of the posters felt I was over reacting to a situation. I appreciate the fact that they told me and I would not have posted the question if I was no looking for honest responses, but others just like everyone to agree with them or to support what they did/how they think regardless.

I love typing, so you took your ball and went home, so, whatever. :)

It's either nervous women who fear husbands will see/recognize their posts or someone gets upset that answers are not what they wanted so they erase their question(s) and flounce off.

I feel confused with one of the answers here. Erasing a question does not protect the writer from being on Facebook or the Internet. I suggest it just makes them look foolish, controlling, unhappy, choose your reaction, because the answers are still out there and they always give enough detail that anyone reading them will be able to know much of what the post was all about. And......I suggest that with the answers still there the reader's imagination can make the original question seem more serious than it was and create more drama and misunderstandings.

I feel somewhat irritated when the original question is erased. It just feels childish to me which feeds into my issue of having people be responsible for what they do. It feels to me that when the person erases the question they are not taking responsibility for what they wrote. They are being aggressive rather than assertive. If it's important enough to post it, it's important enough to leave it there.

This is my issue and so I choose to not dwell longer on it than a few seconds to half a minute. I sometimes have a flash of irritation and feeling it's rude but mostly I feel sad that this person is this sensitive and doesn't realize that they can not take back what has already been posted. And that erasing the post doesn't change their situation much if at all. For me, it appears more that they're ashamed of what they've said which is not helpful in solving their situation.

From a different perspective..

Many of us give thought and care to our responses. This is my time and effort I m giving.. To delete your question after people have given them their time.. I think is rude.

Maybe consider stating.. as soon as I am finished with my question.. I am going to delete.. it. That way we can decide if we want to put any or so much effort into giving our thoughts and time.. .

Well I should have seen this one before I posted my question...which was basically the same thing lol

Like what grammarocks said, despite being deleted. Nothing is truly erased. Mamapedia had a backup, also library of congress has mind boggling backups like convos eyc. So just be careful what you post anywhere.