Seeking Advice on Meal Time for 22-Month-old

i stick to 5 oz. of milk for breakfast, 4 oz. when she wakes up from nap and 5 oz. at bed time. The rest of the time she drinks water. It took her about a week of asking for milk every 5 seconds to relize I was the boss.

A lot of kids are like this - I think it has more to do with the whole process of sitting down to eat than it does the actual food. What if you put her on the back deck or on the playground WITH goldfish or go-gurt? If she can eat it while she plays then will she? If so, then it's not that she doesn't like food, it's that she doesn't like to have to stop what she's doing to do it, thus the convenience of the sippy cup. My daughter was like that and I actually would put baby food in a sippy cup and water it down. I'd add that rice stuff to her juices and milk, and I used Carnation Instant breakfast a lot. I used to put goldfish and raisins inside my daughters Leapfrog learnign table, it has a littel compartment, and she'd open that compartment and eat a few bites, then go on to the next thing, but she'd go back to that compartment a lot :o) Eventually you have to get them to SIT DOWN AND EAT. I came up with eating games, where we'd have a pile of crackers, cheese and ham, and make our little cracker sandwiches to eat. Or make spaghetti and put him on the counter as you make it and let her stir the ground beef and sauce together (not over the stove of course), and then when ti's done, teach her how to slurp up the noodles. Make it fun. So what if it's a big mess, clean it up and soon she'll learn to not make quite such a mess. I often kept my daughter in her diaper only during mealtimes. Also, because my daughter was in daycare and had babysitters and grandparents that watched her a lot, she often got chicken nuggets, which were her favorite food (like many kids) but it is SO unhealthy and it drove me nuts! I finally decided I was not going to let her eat junk anymore, and I'd read a book that told me that even babies are human and know the basic needs. When they get hungry, they'll eat - unless of course you're giving them calories and nutrients elsewhere. What I wound up doing, which may seem extreme - is I took everything away, except water and meals. If she ate her meal she would get a treat afterwards. If she didn't eat she was darn hungry that night. That only happened a night or two though. As soon as she realized it was this or nothing, she caught on quick. The first week I made meals that she'd like but within a few weeks I got to where she would eat Mahi Mahi and asparagus with me at the table. It was amazing the transition she went through in such a short time just because I stuck to my guns. I'm not here to tell you this was a breeze - those first few days/nights when she was hungry and stubborn - she was screaming and would say she couldn't sleep because she was so hungry, and the big thing was to be relaxed about it - and not show a reaction. Just say "Oh, sweetie you'll be fine" with no reaction whatsoever. Do not let it worry you. If you think you'll get worried about her health, talk to your doctor and explain to him what you're thinking about doing, and ask him what would happen if she went without any food, or just a few bites of food for a day or two. I know our dr. supported it completely. So I'd suggest coming up with a meal plan for the week, and sticking to it. She gets water all she wants and she can eat at mealtime or not, it's up to her. Now of course if you go two whole days w/o her eating anything, then get some nutrients and calories in her. Put some baby food and yogurt and juice into a sippy cup for her, but not at mealtime. Maybe just before bedtime (and before toothbrushing time). But I've never had that happen. It was only a meal or two that she'd miss, for the first few days and she was on track. We had several dinnertimes that went awry because she didn't cooperate, but I'd just go on with my eve and eat my dinner and let her be hungry and frustrated, and I'd act like I didn't care. Of course I fretted wondering if she's going to starve, but any practitioner will assure you she's fine, esp. if it's just one or two meals. So you just have to keep telling yourself she's fine and you're doign the right thing. The nights she'd skip dinner, she would be cranky and it was an awful week or so getting her adjusted to my schedule, but after just a week or two, I had her at a point where she would just eat whatever I ate. I guarantee you, you go to one of those third world countries and give a child ANY food and they'll scarf it up. They're not picky. They don't insist on anything in particular. We spoil our kids, and that is why they do require specific things. I appreciate the fact that we're in a position to be ABLE to spoil our kids, however, knowing how to spoil them and when to stop is vital.

My son will be 2yrs old next month and this is a typical eating schedule for him of the different things he may eat for a meal.

Morning
-Sippy cup milk & some sort of breakfast item (cereal, eggs, toast, waffle, fresh or canned (no added sugar/light syrup) fruit. Sometimes he'll get and additional 1/2 sippy cup of milk.

Sanck
-Cheese nips, crackers, dry cereal, fruit, fruit grain bars, hulled popcorn puffs (look like cheetos but made from popped corn)

Lunch
-Some sort of meat-lunch meat, hot dog, corn dog. Fresh or canned fruit, beefaroni or ravaoli, or a Hormel kids dinner (small little nuke'm things found in the canned good section), mac and cheese (sometimes I'll cut up hot dog and toss that in there). Left overs from dinner the night before. (Normally we eat the same thing)

Sanck
-Same as last time.

Dinner
-What ever I cooked. Steak, pork chops, chicken, casseroles, spatthi, noodles, veggies (fresh or canned), rice, and a sippy cup of milk.

Again, snack same as before.

Sippy cups with juice are 75% water and 25% juice give or take but there is always more water than juice. And he maybe gets between 3-5 cups of that through out the day. The only way I can get him to drink plain water is if it is ice cold.

Basicly, he eats what ever I fix or eat because I'm not a short order cook. He has gone on eating jags where he won't sit at the table to eat. He wants to reach his hand up there and grab a few bites only to run off for 15 mins and then come back for more. I put a stop to that by removing his plate from the table as soon as he gets down.

Hope this helps you out with your daughter. Just remember, you are the parent which means you are the one in control, not her!!

Good luck!
~S.

By 22 months, my children are eating three meals a day, when we/the family eat. I let them have 7 ounces of orange juice in the morning. They get a sippy cup of milk at lunch and dinner and usually drink about 16 ounces total of milk. They have two snacks a day, usually...mid morning and after their nap in the afternoon. The mid morning snack is getting more sporadic though and depends on how fillng of a breakfast we've had. If they need something to drink during the day, it's water, straight up, no juice! Regular apple juice, etc, all the time is VERY bad for their teeth. They get more nutrients/vitamins from eating straight up fruits and vegetables than from drinking the juice.

Our routine pretty much stays the same. We occasionally miss a snack here and there. Snacks are usually light as well, with a small treat out of the snack box, fruit or (on occasion) candy.

If I see they are drinking more of their milk than eating their food, we limit milk for that meal until they eat more of their meal.

Hi! I have a 21 month old daughter. I work full time and my daughter goes to an in home childcare. When she's home with me she's ready to get breakfest around 8am (she usually plays in her crib for awhile before she starts yelling for me.) I give her eggs and toast, pancakes, or sometimes I just give her fruity cheerios and a fruit. She gets a sippy cup of milk (maybe 4 oz.)I will give her a morning snack of a fruit, pretzel sticks, or some type of cracker along with a drink (about another 4 oz.) If I notice she is getting sleepy she'll go down for a short nap. When she gets up I have her lunch ready. I still give her toddler food from gerber. The babysitter gives her whatever she makes for the other children for lunch. She gets another drink usually of juice or water. She gets a small afternoon snack. Again its similar to the morning snack. Than we have dinner around 5:30pm. I ususally try and make something she can eat, but if not she gets the toddler food. The toddler food can be 5 meat sticks, a 1/2 of jar of veg. and a 1/2 a jar of fruit. Sometimes she will eat it all sometimes she won't. I try to start getting her ready for bed around 7:30pm. If I notice she seems to be hungry she will get another light snack. She always has a sippy cup sitting somewhere around the house. She drinks whenever she want's. She will let me know she wants food or drink by going to the pantry closet, refrig, and/or cabinet. She still gets one bottle of milk (8oz)at night before bed.
It is important to have your child eat healthy. Offer healthy snacks/food with a drink. I wouldn't be to concerned with a schedule unless you would like to have one. Some kids/parents don't like to have one. And that's ok. We have one because of the babysitter. I try to stay on her schedule. Which it makes it easier on me also. I know about when she will need her naps, etc. Another thing, if your concerned about her milk in take you can try letting her choose the drink she wants. If you don't want her to have alot of milk, then offer her water or juice. If she continually wants the milk tell her thats not a choice. Sit out a sippy cup of water and one of juice. She'll pick one up sooner or later. I'm not sure if this helps you any, but good luck!

I am so glad you posted this! My 22 month old just decided to be a picky eater too, and wants to drink all the time! I have figured out that it is more because he gets bored eating - because he can do so many other things now. And he completely has to feed himself, so if he can't keep it on the spoon or fork, he gets really frustrated and just wants to get down. (So for my sake now he's getting sticky foods.)

We have 3 routine mealtimes - not a specific time, just according to when we wake up. And he still eats a mid morning and mid-afternoon snack. The meals have to be eaten at the table, and he doesn't get to decide what he wants to eat. Snacks however, I let him pick out, and he can eat them on the run. I just give him a choice - cheese, crackers, fruit or raisins, and he loves that he has a choice!

I give him milk with breakfast and dinner, but at the sitters during the day he gets juice and water. When he's going through a growth spurt or not eating much, I do give him an extra cup of milk after dinner.

It's so good to hear that it's not just my son going through this - and hopefully its just a phase!

Wow, its so odd that I read this today. My daughter is 26 months and was still on a bottle and drinking milk like crazy too. She would have at LEAST four 8 oz bottles of milk a day. She has been having problems going to poop so we took her to the doctor yesterday and her doctor told us we should only be giving her around 16-24 oz of milk 24 at the most a day! Its the same here where she will just drink milk all day and it ruins her appetite for solids foods. The ped suggested only giving her milk in the sippy cup. 20 minutes before the child is ready to eat NOTHING to drink, no milk, water, juice or anything. And then nothing for five minutes after meal time starts. Put veggies and meats on the plate first then after five minutes you may put the carbs like bread, rice, potatoes, pasta on the plate. Once the child says they are done to leave the plate on the table for 20 minutes afterward becasue they may come back to it. Also that it may be a struggle at first getting them to eat healthier, like their veggies, sometimes you may have to put a veggie in front of them 30 times before they eat it. I know it sounds like a lot but you sound like you are going through the same thing I am right now. My daughter hates eating just about everything, loves milk, and I give it to her because of excuses too. I'm working on it, I just started yesterday and I know it will be hard but it can be done. I just have to stick to it.

My son is 28 months. He has always been a good eater and I am very happy for that. His favorite food is fruit. How did I get so lucky I am not sure. My son would probably live on milk all day too if I let him. He only gets 2 cups a day though and I stand firm on that one. He gets one when he wakes up and one in the evening, after supper. For breakfast he eats a piece of fruit and a breakfast item (Pancakes, french toast, Bacon,Egg &Chz Toaster struttel, Waffle) The rest of the day he drinks water with just a slash or two of juice. I have started putting ice in the cup when I cut the juice, it seems to help him drink the water better. He has never had full strength juice so that is not a problem here. Snack are usually applesauce, fruit popcycles, crackers, dry cereal, piece of fruit, ect.
Lunch and dinner, I just try to keep it balances. I try to serve a piece of fruit or a veggie at every meal. I do find if he drinks more milk he eats less food. That is why they say no more than 2 cups at this age. I do believe though that you don't want to battle over meals. Serve them and let them know that is what there is. If she chooses not to eat don't battle her, but eventually she will get hungry and start eating what you fix her. I never make my son finish his plate. But he has to eat a well balance before any sweets. Schedule wise I adhere to a loose schedule. Generelly meals are 7:30, 12, 5:30pm. Someday this change because of what we are doing. Snacks depend on where we are and what we are doing and when he asks for something. I do believe that kids thive on structure but it can't be so rigid that you can't live your life too. I hope this helps. I hope this helps. Good luck.

SM-
HI there! I have a 27 month old and around 21-22 months he started going through a stage where he just wouldn't eat. Lunch was the first meal to go. It went for about 3-4 months. He too loves milk and would always ask for that through out the day and would drink 4-5 sippy cups of milk no problem. I asked other moms in our moms group and they said this was most likely a stage. Other moms said their kids did that too so I felt better. Casey is getting back to regular meals so that is good. I saw it as if he is really hungry, he will eat. Hope this helps:)
E.

kids seem to do better when they can eat every 2 - 3 hours. they don't "hoard" food like us big folks - they listen to their bodies and know when to stop eating. just make sure the snacks are healthy, like cut up grapes, raisins, cheese or wheat crackers. when you think your little doll has had enough milk or juice - offer them water. IF they are truly thirsty - they will drink it. I had the same issue w/ my son. He would drink a ton of juice if I allowed him! best of luck. : )

I don't put my 2yo on a schedule. They have growth spurts and the like. Some days they are hungrier than others. Now, I don't give my 2yo milk at all unless it's soy milk. Cow's milk just causes too many problems with ear infections, colds...cow's milk is extremely mucus forming. (I learned that with my oldest.)

Anyway, my 2yo mainly drinks water. I don't do the juice thing either, as there is nothing of nutritional value there. Too much sweet. So besides water, we give her Emergen C sometimes with the water and sometimes koolaid, but the koolaid is sweetened with stevia and the water is Kangen water. But mostly we all drink water, so the water doesn't affect our eating.

She eats when she is hungry.

honestly she's a toddler , toddlers have weird eating habits . my son is 3 and his eating changes with the wind. one day he will drink all day and eat everything you give him next day he wont eat anything but rice. just keep some snacks available to her to eat through out the day so she can eat when she is hungry. you'll start to see a pattern and she will get into a exact schedule later right now its not really that important. Just make sure the snacks are healthy , yes goldfish do count as healthy.

My 21 month old girl has been a pretty good eater since she got to grown-up food, so I've been lucky. When she doesn't like the food, she'll just go hungry til the next meal. As for the excuses (we all have them), think about yourself - just because you have a cold, would you want to just drink all day (except maybe for a sore throat)? So just feed her like you feed yourself.
I almost have to force milk most days, probably because she eats so much food. We have 6 oz in the morning and a few oz at each meal, snack and bedtime. She gets juice at daycare, but I don't give any at home. And there's always a cup of water available in her reach.
She eats 3 main meals, 2-3 snacks, plus the cup of milk when she 1st gets up. The times aren't strict, but if I get late on a meal, she lets me know!
You're probably just going through a stage and a little consistency couldn't hurt. Good luck and don't stress too much.

My baby is 21 months old and I usually just go by feel of the situation.I think your worrying to much about what to do or not to do. I give my baby tea,milk w.e he wants at the moment to drink during the day.But if I notice that he is gulping it down and then begging for more I know he's not thirsty but wanting anything sugary.So I just put ice water in his cup and let that be it for the day since he sips on it throughout the day I don't usually have to refill it often.As for eating I let him eat cereal or a pop tart or grits,I allow him to choose.And I usually fix him a freezer lunch since mine can eat a whole one by himself in his highchair and loves it. And he usually doesn't get anything else till dinner.That's just how it runs in my home and it doesn't mean u have to do it that way but you can offer him fruit bites throughout the day plus what u feed him for lunch and breakfast.Otherwise babies shouldn't really snack that much.

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my son does not sit down and eat three square meals (28 months). Instead I steam him veggies, and put them on a plate, have a plate of fruit, some nuts, some cereal (dry), nutritional bars,(soy) yogurt, pb and J on whole grain, things like that and when he wants to eat, he can choose a plate and eat however much he likes.We have a kitchen helper which is a wooden step up with sides that puts him even with a counter and he has an eating area there where he comes and goes as he pleases. He basically munches through the day which is good for their metabolism and keeps them from over eating. He only wants (rice) milk a couple times of day so I just keep a cup for him in the fridge. He wouldn't eat food at all for a long time, so this works for us. he is now in normal range of weight so I know he gets enough. As long as he's eating healthy foods and looks healthy I would go with what works.

Children of this age are all about wanting to take control. You need to go back to a regular mealtime routine and stick to it. I don't mean exactly 8am, 12noon and 6pm, but a regular breakfast, lunch and supper routine. She should sit at the table or in her highchair and be given a balanced diet in age appropriate portions. Small portions are better and less overwhelming than a plate full of food. Give her a small amount to drink with her meal and no more. If she doesn't eat or throws a fit get her down from the table and don't give her anymore food and only water until the next meal. If you continue to give in to her demands she will continue to manipulate you and only milk will lead to anemia. She won't starve herself, but she will probably have some whoppers of temper tantrums. If you can't hold out, take her to the table and again make her sit in her seat. Offer her some fruit, cheese or fresh veggies-no sweets and no juice or milk in between. It is all about a battle of wills. She knows she can manipulate you and you give in to her demands. You must be consistent. That is the key with children.
I am a pediatric nurse with 35 years experience dealing with children, my own 3 included.
S. R.