Should I Do Something for My Children?

We gave them personalized t-shirts to wear to the hospital. The first had "I'm a Big Sister", next we had Big and Biggest Sister shirts and finally we had Big Sister Club shirts. They were different each time but also had their names. I will see if I can find th web site we used. They were not very expensive, had long and short sleeves available and we received them VERY quickly once ordered.

When I had my last child, I had a planned c-section. I brought a gift for each of my 3 kids and one for my husband. In it was a coloring book and crayons, A Shirt (I had designed) that had I'm a big sister/brother with a special meaning on it for each child, and husband for my husband's shirt it said "I'm the bid daddy" and a camera (that was just a disposal one) That way each of my children was part of that special day.

My first thought was the same as Eliza's. I took my 3 yr old shopping for a gift for the baby. He was so excited! He'd decided that babies like rattles, but when we got to the store, he picked out a shockingly orange sleeper with a robot on it. Not my first choice, but I love that it is coming from him.
My mother, on the other hand, decided to make my two boys "big brother gifts." She had some fabric and made them blankets. They LOVE blankets, so they'll love those. I think it's great that they're coming from someone other than me! When #2 was born, my sister sent a little toy to my #1. Honestly, it was great that he had something to do in the boring hospital room after his 2-yr-old attention span ran dry. But it wasn't really that special of a thing for him. Of course, your kids are older.
I don't see a problem with the baby getting all the attention. I mean, your kids get all the attention on their birthdays, right? Besides, kids need to learn that it's not always about them, and to be happy for and contribute to other peoples' special days. I think your kids are old enough do handle that.

Oh, and as for feeling special themselves, make sure that you let them hold the baby and take pictures of them, praise them for being good big siblings. And spend a few minutes with them while visitors are holding the baby, etc. They'll know that the baby didn't just steal their mom!

I had my 3rd (a boy) at age 30, when my daughter was 7 & my older son was 5. Our parenting class recommended having a little birthday party for the new baby when he came home from the hospital (actually, we had it the next night, because we came home from the hospital only hours after Kev was born). Anyway, the big kids had fun making decorations, which stayed up for awhile, & my mom baked a little "0" birthday cake. It was fun! When my older son was born, a couple of months before our daughter was 2, we gave her a big sister present to open so she wouldn't feel left out, & I've often done that at baby showers in which there are slightly older siblings involved.

The main thing to do, though, is not let your older son's birthday get forgotten about. Even if the baby is born on his birthday, find some way to celebrate it to make him feel special.

Hi Laura,

Congratulations!! I think it's always a good idea to have a small gift for the older children from the baby. Also most hospitals will bring a sibling cake up to your room to celebrate, so check with your hospital :-)

Hope that helps!

maybe have your older kids pick a gift for the baby. That's what we did with our first when we were expecting our second. We took him to the store and let him pick out something for his new baby brother-that way he felt as though he was already a great big brother and he was watching out for him by caring for him and getting him something. :) (it can be anything as simple as bibs, burp cloths, a snuggly blanket or one of their toys that they already own.)

When I had my fourth and the other kids were a little older, I let them buy a little gift to bring to the baby. I also put together a gift basket of things to do with dad while I was in the hospital ( blockbuster & pizza gift card, card game etc.)I gave it to them when they came to see the baby. They seemed really excited about that and my hubby was very grateful:)!

L.,
I would lean toward having your children do something for the baby rather then you do something for them. They are old enough to not feel completely threatened, but be really excited about their new friend! Service elicits Love. It could be something as simple as making a welcome home card, or let them pick out some essentials or a toy or lovey. I think the cupcake idea is cute too. Also try to say "Our Baby" or when talking to them" your baby brother or sister". It will encourage ownership, not of the baby, but in Family unity and loyalty.
When my second child turned 5 my fourth was born. It was my due date, and the whole time I was hoping that he would either come early or late, but no he came on her birthday. She was sooo excited to have a baby brother for her birthday! It was hard to convince her that he really didn't just belong to her. This year is the first that they will be celebrating together. My baby is turning one and my 6yr old to be is completely fine and excited to share her day with him, for now.
Good luck with the Birthday and with the Birthing day.
E.

One thing that I read, and we did when my second was born - instead of holding baby the first time your older child comes in to meet him, lay the baby down before big sister comes in. When she comes in, pick *her* up (or have her sit next to you on the bed, or whatever works best), then pick up the baby together so big sister can get a good look at him. We did that with my oldest daughter when my second was born, and I think it helped foster a feeling that this was "our" baby, and that she hadn't been replaced.

I wouldn't! Let the birth of their baby be their present to them! It is such a wonderful, miraculous thing. Why tint it with a temporal gift? It's a wonder, and they will remember their visit to the hospital for the rest of their lives. Enjoy this amazing moment with your kids!!! And sit back and watch them enjoy their new sibling.

Since they are old enough to be creative, why not have THEM make something for the new baby when they meet him? Then you can make something too, "from the baby" to give to them.

Maybe they can decorate a picture frame to keep a picture of the first meeting on the dresser, and each child can always have one.

Congrats on number 3!

My kids were younger, but we wanted them to understand (as much as they could) that a new person was joining our family. We talked about baby all the time. We found out the gender and started calling him (#2) and her (#3) by name right away. Whenever we counted people or talked about family, we always included baby. I made shirts to give to the kids to wear to the hospital that said "I'm Asha's big sister/brother" with a big and little of their favorite animal. It was easy to make and I got the shirts on sale at Michaels. We also asked all the family/friends that would be coming to the hospital and to our house to have one or both the kids introduce their new brother/sister. It was so fun to see the joy of them introducing and loving on their new sibbling. It lets them feel important and is a good reminder for those visiting to acknowledge the older kids too. And asking them how they want to help (get diapers, fold clothes, help rock/feed, whatever) so that they get to pick is a great way to get them involved. Have them help get baby's room ready - we did removable stickers for #3 and let the kids put them wherever. After 4 months, my middle still talks about the silly butterfly sicker on her door. The more you can talk about it now, the easier it will go. Good luck. 3 is hard, but a blessing!

My daughter and I made cupcakes together and then froze them. Then, when my son was born, grandma brought the cupcakes and juice to the hosp and we had a birthday party for the baby (they won't let you have candles, FYI). We included some close family friends, but you could pass cupcakes out to the staff too. Balloons and party hats if you want. Congratulations!

I think it all depends on your kids -- and you know them best. Are they excited for a new brother? (not just your excitement being imprinted on them). You have to remember that just because you made the decision to have a new baby doesn't mean they will be happy about it. Your kids, even though they are almost 5 and 7 may still have some jealousy issues. You are gonna start spending a LOT of attention and time with the new baby and they might feel shut out. What else have you done to prepare them for a baby? Try for a minute to think about the baby from their perspective and see how you feel. You could even have a talk with them to see if you can get them to share how they feel about a new one (who knows, despite how you feel, your son might think it is cool to share a birthday with his brother). Good luck to you!