Sleep Issue - Morro Bay,CA

I just went thru this with my 19 month triplets. He is probably getting some new teeth in the back. They will let you hold them all night . I gave them a dose of motrin because it lasts longer than tylenol. I let them fall asleep next to me not in my arms, I took them for rides in the car, what ever it takes to get them asleep. It is better to take the time to comfort him to sleep than just let him cry. If he is truly uncomfortable the crying will become tantrums or hysterics. He may vomit because of the saliva in his mouth. Good luck and let me know how it goes.

That happened to me and I moved the crib of my baby to the side of my bed for a few months, let him hold onto my thumb (in the crib) while I sleep and it worked for me.

By the time my boys were this age, if I went to them at night, it only got them more awake and made it harder for them to get back to sleep (except, of course, if they were sick or there was a problem that needed my attention). There are lots of great moms on both sides of the fence on this whole "crying" issue. I, personally, have found for my kids, I need to let them cry a little. They don't cry for hours and hours. It is really just a minute or two, if even that. My boys have slept in the same room since the baby was 5 months old, and they never wake each other up. I'm sure it is just because they are used to it by now. But we have been through many illnesses or sleeping troubles and it has rarely ever disturbed the other child. Even through the stomach flu, changing sheets and comforting and caring for the sickie. Mine are 3 and 2 years old and still occassionally cry out briefly in the night. It is rare, and it usually lasts about 1-3 seconds. But they know that when I put them to bed, it is time for sleep. And if they wake up in the middle of the night, they just go back to sleep. They have learned that they don't need me in order to get back to sleep. I know some would call me an Ogre, but I really love my kids (and they know I love them) and I want what is best for them - and I believe sleep is a critical need in their lives, that they need to be able to do on their own.
However, you really have to decide what you are comfortable with. This is your child and your family. I hope you can take all of the suggestions and find a plan that works for you. And I hope peaceful nights return to your household!:)

Hi E., he may be hungry. Maybe a bowl of cereal and milk before bedtime may help. It will be hard to break him of the habit if you put him in bed with you. Try to put a pillow and blanket on the floor in his room and lay there with him. Make sure you have a gate on the door so he doesn't leave after you go back to bed. I work at home and have a 5y/o granddaughter. She still comes to our bed or mommy's bed almost everynight. It is hard to break her of this habit but we are working on it.

Try sleep training. It involves crying but not ignoring the cries. When your child wakes go into his room after 5 min of crying, tell him everything is OK but he needs to stay in his own bed, dont touch him, and leave the room. He will cry louder but dont worry. Then go in after 10 min. of crying and do the same thing. Then 15,20, etc. It took my daughter one hour of me doing this for one night. Now she sleeps through the night unless something is bothering her. It will be a rough night but its worth it! I did it on the weekend so that my husband wouldnt be tired the next day at work. Some kids take longer than one night though.

Hi E.,
Is your son teething or learning a new skill? This may be one reason he's getting up. Also, I found if you keep the room cooler, the baby sleeps better. Maybe try a fan in the room - the white noise and cool air may keep him asleep.

Hope this helps.

Unfortunately, there is no easy way to get her sleep pattern back to match the families except to let him cry. A few nights without any company and he will fall back asleep by himself when he wakes up. I would walk in and P. him but not pick her up so he knows you are there but choosing not to visit with him. If he is still in his crib, it will be easier. If not, you'll have to put up a gate at his door. He may cry himself back to sleep on the floor in front of the gate once or twice, but he'll get it quickly. Too bad the rest of the family will be woken up with is crying, but you need your sleep, too, and it's the only way to get peace back in your house at night.

Hi E., I hate to say this as a mom and a wife, but your husband is right, he will continue to wake up and cry as long as he knows somwone will come in there, when that stops, the waking up and crying will stop, also it isn't a good idea to go visit people or do things that messes up a childs sleep schdule, to the point to where you are at right now, also for him to start being dry in the mornngs you may not want to put water in his crib, I put the water in there, but at a much younger age. J.

Boy that is hard. The old fashion way is to let them cry. As mean as it seems it really is the best way. The baby enjoyed that extra time and comfort when you were visiting and now doesn't want to give that up. I would think it may take three nights and an occassional shorter three to four nights. Ear plugs are good or headphones to listen to music. With my oldest i had to go out to the car in the winter and i could still hear her. So i do feel for you. Hold on, it will be fine. Most kids at three will not wake up for a house alarm so don't be concerned with that.

As hard as it will be.... your husband is on the right track. You have to commit to it(don't do it if you aren't committed 100% as it will just be unnecessary torture)& it might take a couple of hours the 1st couple nights-- but he will quickly learn. Kids (even 19 month olds) are so smart & it sounds like he has figured out that this is a way to get one on one time with mom. It is working for him so unless you change how you respond, it is likely to continue. I know that probably isn't what you want to hear :( Good luck.

I got up and vacuumed. They (the twins) knew I was up but was not coming in there. They stopped soon. I had to do this as I was going back to work and needed to sleep. The house will have to put up with it for a couple of nights.

Good luck!!

Hi there,
I had a lot of problems with my 15 month old too. Up until about a month ago she was waking up sometimes 2 times a night, every night. There were many times where I was going in her room 4 times a night. FINALLY, I got fed up and let her cry herself back to sleep. Of course I would make sure she was clean and safe, and then I would shut her door and mine, and go back to sleep. It was very hard to do of course because she was sreaming her head off, but I just couldn't take it any more (mind you I had been going into her room for at least 4 months straight)
When I would wake up, usually like an hour or two has past and she's sound asleep. I have no idea how long she cried for, but, she fell asleep. She now sleeps through the night.....for the most part. She wakes up EVERY day at 4:45 am- 5:30 am. I get her and bring her into my bed. (My husband leaves the house at 4:30am for work)And we sleep until 6:00-7:00am. Hell, I'm NOT waking up at 4:45. So, this is the only was she will sleep in. I could let her cry, but I really don't want to deal with that early in the morning. So it works for us.
My point is that you just need to let him cry it out. Yes, your household will loose a few days of sleep, but I'm telling you, this will work. Why do you thik it is so popular? Because it works.......
Good luck!

Dear E.,

Listen to Dad, and just use his support to let the rest of the family know what is happening. All will be well. C. N.

Hello E.,
I agree with Laura's comment. My little one (4 now) did the same thing. I went to his room and slept in the same bed with him (he was in a twin bed at that time). Once he goes back to sleep you can go back to your room. I guess he felt secured and slept until morning. It also brought an incredible bond between him and I. They grow up soooo fast. Enjoy it while you can. Please do NOT let him cry it out. I never believed in that horible method! Give him milk before he goes to bed. They sleep better on a full stomach. Good luck.
M.

Dear E.,
Have you considered DIET to be a possible culprit? If your baby is exposed to ANY sugar it may be too stimulating at this age. Even up to ten years old my kids would get hyper if I allowed them sugar (I would use it as a reward - candy only once a week if they did all their chores). ALso - Don't expose your little one to ANY TV. TV stimulates the Pineal gland, which signals the body to WAKE UP!
Also - don't let him take a long nap in the day - no more than an hour at a time. There will usually be one period during a 24 hour day when they will sleep 4 hours straight, so make sure they never sleep that long during the day. There are other tips on my website:
www.gomommygo.com
There's one about sleeping here:
http://www.gomommygo.com/obey_plan.html#sleep
My daughter in law swears by his approach. Her kids get to sleep and stay asleep at night. Amazing!
I wish I had known his secret!
Best,
R.

I have three children & I never left them to cry. He is still just a baby & needs you when he wakes. I don't know how many naps he's getting during the day, but you can try shortening or eliminating one of them, especially the one just prior to bedtime. When my kids had long periods of wakefulness during the night, it was usually a sign that they just weren't tired, so I shortened their daytime naps. It worked every time!

Good luck!

Could he be teething? Do you have any pets like a cat that might be getting in his crib.Why is his bed wet, is the sealing leaking. Something is making the bed wet, could it be from his crying.or swetting.The wetness is waking him.Some times para normal things happen and the young can sence them.There are lots of things that could be causing the problem. My 26 year old use to keep me up during the night when he was about your sons age.I dont remember if he was teething or not though. It was very stressful because at night I got very little sleep while he went through that stage, but it eventually stopped and everything got back to normal. I don't know if I helped or not but hope I did in some way.

Try feeding him dinner a little later. Babies sometimes sleep better on a full tummy.
He is probably trying to adjust to being in a different environment. He may be confused, uncomfortable, disoriented, etc. You may want to try bringing him in your room for a week or two until he is used to living in a new place.

Hi E.:
Making a baby cry it out,rather than responding to his cries,is the (lazy) way to solve your problem. Its an option,but not one recomended by most professionals.First, to suggest the rest of the household to just (deal with it)Is selfish,and shows a lack of respect or concern for others.No baby,should be left unatended to cry for hours,and in my personal opinion, turning on a vacume or a radio to drowned out his cries is not only cruel,but neglectful.Anything could happen,especially in two hours time,while your attempting to shut him off.A babies only way to communicate with you,is through his cries. When you don't respond, he feels abandoned.There is no question,that eventually,after hours of crying,your baby will (pass out) from exhaustion. You would to. This is not merely stressful on you, but it is equally tramatic for him.You mentioned your husband is away for weeks at a time. Your a SAHM. You have the advantage to spend alot of quality time with your children.I realize, that you need sleep, but I think you already know the reason for the change in his sleeping habits.He got use to the sleeping arrangments at his Grandmas,and now he has to get back into his regular routine.I don't know how long daddy has been working away for weeks at a time, but believe it or not, it effects his feelings of insecurity.With him away,its important he feels the closeness of his mother being there.I am a little puzzled,as to why you must rock him for so long.I'm guessing,that as soon as you try to lay him down,he wakes.If he was recently weaned,did you leave him with anything to help soothe him at bed time?Does he have a favorite blanket,or stuffed toy?He sounds like hes needing something to help soothe him to sleep.Your son,has been thrown off a little by his visit to Grandmas. Give him a little time for the ajustment back.Yes, you will lose some sleep,till he gets back into the groove of things,but the answer,is not ignoring his cries for you. I wish you and your darlin son the very best. J.

hold him and dance, he will go to sleep