Sleep Problems

Hi A.,

I have had the same problem with my 21 month old daughter too once in awhile. What I do now is laying her back down on her tummy and start rubbing her back and she would start settling down and falling asleep and then I would cover her and leave the room. It may take awhile but she is in her crib going to sleep. I have also done what you have been doing sleeping on the couch, but my daughter moves around so much I can't do that anymore so I tried this. Also having a night light helps too. Hope this might work for you.
Good luck

At 22 months, your daughter is beginning to become more independent and is able to think past the immediate present. This is really an exciting time and a lot of fun. However, it also can lead to problems sleeping because when she wakes up in the middle of the night afraid or for whatever reason, she can lay around and think about the fact she's all alone in the room and doesn't like it. This is not so fun.

This stage will pass which is why you don't see many posts from mothers trying to ask for help with their gradeschool kid who won't sleep through the night.

My kids went through this and here are some of the things I did:

I use the fisher price aquarium toy which has music and light. In fact, my 5 year old still likes to turn it on when he's going to sleep and will hit it on if he wakes up in the middle of the night.

I have a fan going in the room to produce white noise. This is helpful to muffle out background sounds that may wake your daughter up and make her wonder what the noise is.

Encourage the use of a favorite stuffed animal or toy to bring to bed. She may be soozed by its presence enough to go back to sleep without needing you.

Stop taking her out of the room to go back to sleep. I took to sleeping on the floor next to my son's bed. Yes, it wasn't the most comfortable, but I could quickly soothe him back to sleep.

Whatever you do, and I know its not easy, don't get angry or scold your daughter. You want sleep time to be a positive experience, not a battle. Think of all the times you wake briefly through the night. Ultimately, she will also be able to put herself back to sleep on her own. It may not be instantly, but it will happen.

Both of my kids sleep through the night consistently at ages 3 and 5. I only have to get up with them if one of them is sick or has a nightmare. Though I will admit that there were some nights that I thought I was never going to sleep again.

Good Luck. Hang in there. It will get better.

We are going through that with our 2 year old son as well. He is having nightmares due to the fact that at this age the imagination is starting to develop. What we have done is make sure he has his night lite, his radio on, and we end up rocking him and reminding him that we are here and will keep him safe. This doesn't always work but it does more often than not. Good luck!

My 22 month old son also goes through a pattern of waking up crying in the middle of the night about every 2 weeks. He has been doing this since he was around 18 months old. I am not the mom who lets her child cry, I've always gotten up to get him. However, I have found that if I wait 10-15 minutes, he usually settles down and goes back to sleep. This doesn't always work and it's hard to let him cry because my husband and I both work full-time, so the quick response is to get up and hold him so we can all sleep, but try waiting 10-15 minutes and see if that works. Good luck.

is she having nightmares? my son has been having nightmares and it seemed to become more frequent around 20 months. hes now 2 years and it seems to have tapered off again, but it certainly was scary for him. something bothered him, and it was affecting his sleep.
just try to remain in a normal schedule, try to avoid watching or listening to anything that would be stressful, adult shows and movies are stressful and upsetting to babies...
also around the same time my son started thinking dark = scary.. so we are dealing with that. sometimes i just have to leave a lamp on when he goes to bed so that he isnt in the dark. a night light wasnt enough. also, lullabyes or other white noise seems to help. especially the lullabyes cuz they are pleasant to listen to.

what i instinctivly knew about when my son was waking with a nightmare was that if i immediatly removed him from his crib then he would be comforted, and it would be less likely that he would be sitting in his crib remembering the bad dream, or having the bad feelings, therefore connecting the place with the bad feelings. does that make sense?
yes, sometimes he has trouble laying back down again, but if you sometimes just leave the room and let her wimper for a while, after she has calmed down.... she should be ok.

also, wash the sheets (i recommend NO fabric softener or dryer sheets and using free and clear soaps. my son and i both get a rash - thats new since i got pregnant LOL) feel the mattress and any pillows to make sure nothing is poking anywhere... check all blankets etc too... stuffed animals.... ? one night my son said spider spider spider, and sure enough the next day in bath we notice what was most likely a spider bite. so that could cause trouble the next night cuz they think they may get that again you know?

i dunno.
sleep is a tough thing. i know that what matters most is kids grow in a 2 steps forward one step back pattern... this is most likely just a step back. now, how you deal with that step back determines the next 2 steps forward. whatever you do, let it be with love, respect, and trust in your instinct and her feelings and ability to communicate her needs :D the better and more confidentally you listen and respond, the more it will encourage her to come to you in the future with needs and problems... :D :D :D
awesome :D
www.askdrsears.com might have some help. :D

A.,

Could she be cutting her two year molars? That might be why she is waking up. My son always had rough nights when he was teething. But as another person said, try not to take her out of bed. Just give her a hug and kiss and lay her back down. Good Luck!

This must be what my daughter is going through. She has been coming into my room and falling back to sleep with me. There are times I don't even know it until I awake. My husband doesn't care for this... he says she has a bed, she should be sleeping in it.

No advice.. Just want you to know you are not alone. Let me know what works out. I feel for ya!
~SR

Ask Dr Sears Web site is always helpful. Also his Night Time Parenting saved our lives.
Three in Bed is another, and I know you said you didn't want your baby in bed with you, but at this point, it may be your best option so you can all get the most needed thing - sleep!
Try it and see, you can always go back to the couch or a mattress on the floor. What about a mattress on the floor in your room for your baby? We did a toddler/crib mattress on the floor when transitioning our daughter from our bed to hers. Worked beautifully and I got more sleep.
good luck!
J.

A.,
Although your daughter may be suffering some discomfort from molars, itchy sheets, etc (as all the posters have described), this pattern of waking up has become a part of her sleep pattern. Integral to this pattern is you, the comfortor, who comes in and snuggles with her each time she wakes up. Now is the time where you have to be strong and let her cry for at least 10 minutes before going to her. When you do go to her, try not to get her out of her crib. Give her a hug and a kiss, and say "night night," then leave the room and give it another 10 minutes. I know, it's the classic "cry it out" method, but I am telling you it works if you stick with it. If you HAVE to get her out of bed, go through your bedtime routine again. Keep the room dark, but change her diaper, rock with her, and read her a story (or whatever version of bedtime you have). Put her back to bed just like you did hours before, tell her goodnight, then leave the room. She has to be able to soothe herself through night wakings, or you'll be banished to the couch for several more years! Best of luck to you!
Amy K.

My 18 month old son started doing this same thing after sleeping through the night for months. I am thinking it could be night terrors. I know this sounds crazy but my pediatrician recommended that we wake him up about a half hour after he goes to sleep at night to disrupt his sleep pattern. I move his blankets around just enough to see his eyes open and close. He goes right back to sleep and sleeps through the night. This works most nights.

We had trouble with our son at about that age when we moved. I asked my pediatrician and they recommended to let him cry it out. They said to let him go as long as 2 hours if necessary, then to go in, reassure him, and leave again. It took the full 2 hours until he settled down, and it was not easy to listen to him cry for that long. However, it worked! The next night he cried briefly, and after that we were done. Good luck!!

My almost-two-year-old only does that when he is hungry or sick. We found out Saturday that he had a double ear infection. Sleep trouble was pretty much his only symptom. When in doubt, we give him children's Motrin.
To avoid the middle-of-the-night hunger (the biggest culprit), we frequently give him a before bedtime snack of oatmeal or banana and a drink of milk to make sure he's full.
I have found that sleeping with them any place- their bed, our bed, the couch- just exacerbates the problem. You're letting your daughter know that if she cries, Mommy will sleep with her. While I'm sure she loves it, it's setting bad precedent and creating bad sleep habits.