someone help me wth this
I think most little boys (and girls) think their daddy is just perfect! Let him enjoy the relationship and just be consistent in other discipline areas. He should mind his parents (both) and teachers when he is in school, even though he may favor one or another. There is nothing guaranteed on how long any of us will be in someone's life. I had a life threatening illness in my 40s and now fine, but you just never know.
Ask your husband to support you when you ask your child to do something. He needs to tell the child that he is being disrespectful to you and he(dad) will not allow that.
Dad should be by you all the way.
Your son needs to know that you and his daddy are a team. Have his dad tell him, "You must always respect and obey your mother. If you don't obey her, you aren't obeying me." It's very important that you son recognizes you as his authority now. You don't want him saying, "You don't tell me what to do," when he is 15! Maybe you and your husband should check into some parenting courses so that you can learn how to effectively discipline your son -- for his sake as well as yours.
S. B.
Jennifer,
You son is three-years-old. He is a child, you are an adult. You are the one in control. You need to sit down with your husband and discuss with him the importance of your son obeying you. You also need to let your husband know it's important he support you on this decision. If you don't have his support than you will never get your son to see you as a parental figure. He will grow up thinking you have no control over his life.
Hi Jennifer,
Seems to me daddy needs to support mommy. Your little one needs to have consequences for his actions. If you don't start now while he is still little, you'll end up suffering the consequences later.
Tell his daddy to tell him that he has to listen to you too. And if the daddy does not make him. The when the daddy is around do not help the boy or the daddy not matter what they want you to do. If the boy ask you for something unless it is food tell them to ask his daddy and say that I am just as important as your daddy because I love you, too.
But talk to that man of yours NOW about the way your son acts with you and TELL him to do something about our son. But start with You know I love you and our son but....
Good luck
He is likely just testing you to see what you will do. He's wondering "Does she really mean it? Or can I get away without doing it? What will happen if I don't?" Discipline him/give him a consequence for not obeying, like a time-out. Then make him do what you told him after his time-out. Once he realizes that you mean what you say and that he needs to obey he will do so most of the time, and on occasion he will again test you to see what will happen.
2 great books on discipline I recommend:
Love and Logic Magic, birth to age 6 by Fay & Fay
Boundaries with Kids by Townsend & Kline (Cline?)
Girl you have a respect issue on your hands. Some where he has learned that you are not to be respected. My three year old tried that, and since my husband and I spent eight years in the army each we nipped that in the bud. My two oldest daughters now do push ups when they decide I dont need there respect.The important part is that YOU are the one who punished the bad behavior and dont reserve it for the father. My brothers girl friend has done that with her son he is now four, and a night mare he calles women by all kinds of bad names and sayes he will only do what daddy tells him to do. dont let that be your child. I will not let my children near him or my brother.You also need to find the dicipline tecnic that will work for your child. time outs are great and also taking away prized toys. We chose push ups because our girls are in sports and it helps there game and they respond more to the physical that the time outs.
You and the child's father need to sit down and have a heart to heart talk. The father need to understand that he must show a united front of support for you in front of his child. The father need to help his son understand that both parents are important in his life and that both parents are there to love and care for him. You however, must find a way to let your child know that you will not tolerate his disobedience whether his father is around or not. This child is 3 years old if you don't establish the chain of authority now you never will. I don't believe in abusing children but I do believe that spanking is appropriate when it really is needed. Don't wait until that child does something that will really make you angry and you punish him out of anger.discipline him for the wrong action he has taken. That does not mean that a spanking is warranted everytime the child does something. Hugs, kisses and a strong stand work just as well but you must set the foundation up first. Teach your child about god and how he says a child should act. Teach him while he is young and he will be more accepting of your counseling in the future.
i am 27 and my father is 80. when he is 18 his dad will be 77. if he is still in good health than you don't need to worry about that right now. maybe i misunderstood what was said?
Just explain to your son that you can tell him what to to also. It may just be a phase both of my boys go through them and they will come around just be the same and stick with what you say and make him do it or punish him it is hard but it works
get your husband to tell your son that is suppose to do what his mother tells him to do even if daddy isn't there that way thats him daddy telling him what to do and if he doesn't do it he gets in trouble with his dad when he comes home
Hi Jennifer.. I guess the question here would be- What does his daddy say to YOU? Does he back you up? You and his daddy should be operating as a team in raising your child- if you say no to something- his daddy should be saying "what does mommy say?" or come talk to you about it. And this works the other way too.. If he has said yes or no to something before you- back him up. If you don't agree about what to do, go behind closed doors to work out a solution. Your child needs to see you as a team or a unit- The way things are now, it sounds like he's working the system to get his way- and believe me 3 yr olds can be very aware and very smart. Set boundaries for him (together) Once he sees that you and daddy are in agreement- he is more likely to obey both of you.
