Tantrums with My 18 Month Old Daughter.

Take a stroller along maybe and when she starts put her in it and tell her she can't come out untill she stops.

I have similar problems with my son, 21 months, but not consistently. Sometimes, he' the happiest, most easy going kid and then something can just set him off! I figure that's typical toddler behavior, but certain other behaviors sometimes concern me that it might go deeper.

Are you home full time? I know when mine gets moody or difficult, I try to adjust the schedule to what seem to be his needs. For instance, we usually are up really early, like 6am, he naps around 12 for a couple hours and then gets to bed by 8pm. However, lately, I 've noticed he seems tired and really irritable and not behaving so well when we go out for errands or activities. So we've started sleeping in an extra hour or two and moving nap time back and adjusting our outdoor time to morning instead of afternoon, tv time to afternoon instead of morning, etc. I don't know if that makes sense, but I know every time we hit issues-I just try to analyze his whole person. I go through what he's eating and when and try to change up snacks and I try to ensure there's special time for the things I know he always loves, like extra long bathes or Mama cuddle time. I also make sure I arrange time away like an hour or two to be out of the house on my own and leave him with his aunt or grandma so I don't get too irritable and project it onto him and then we're both having a tantrum.

I think toddler's are constantly testing their environment and their parents and are just looking for reassurance. I haven't started time outs yet, mostly because my son is just starting to talk and I feel like although I can punish him and he can understand he's in trouble, he cannot communicate back with me, what he really wanted or what was wrong. Almost always a tantrum on our end is indicative of tiredness, boredom with the situation, or hunger.

Best I can say is just experiment with her schedule and her needs and see what kind of feedback you get in terms of her mood and attitude. I feel your pain, these are the most trying months yet of parenthood!

Not sure how long the walks are or what time of the day - but she could be going through a development surge and just be tired. My husabnd and I take long walks and seomtimes I have plenty of energy and other days I'm jsut exhausted. If she's heading into a growth spurt she will be exhausted - even if last week she was full of energy at the same time. Do yopu bring snacks?

If that's not the case she's just trying to figure out what works to get her way. You have to ignore the tantrums. Sure you're out for a walk and it's not easy. It will take time out of your walk for the first few days to address the tantrums - but you really need to NOT react. If she has a tantrum and drops to the ground, screaming, wahtever, you and your son will wait a few feet away. Tell her one thing - once "When you're done with yelling & screaming we can go back to our walking - but until then we'll just wait". DO NOT make it pleasant for her, don't sing, don't cajole her, don't plead for her to c'mon and be a good girl. She's only been on the plants for a year and a half - all she knows is that if she screams it seems to work - so sh'es going with what works. The worse thing for a kid is to be ignored. So at this age, bad behavior is ignored. Ignore the things she does to get your attention. She may beg you, scream that you're a bad mommy, tell you her tummy hurts, etc. Just sit patiently and wait. Comfort your son - tell him we'll just wait until "Sally" is ready to go - don't worry I'd never leave her - she's jsut trying to figure out what's the best way to talk to us since she's still learning how to do that really well. At 18 months she's not able to fully express herself and this is one way she is experimenting with.
Do you hae a wagon you can bring along on the walks? I always had great times when my kids were little with wagon walks - they could store their treasures (acorns, cool rocks, etc.) and when they got tired they could climb in.
This will pass - I promise.

Take the stroller, and when she stops walking, make her ride. Also, you may want to try a leash. Kids want to be independent, and a leash allows her to walk without holding your hand. I used them for my kids in the 70's, and used them for my 7 year old granddaughter until she was past 5. She loved them, because she got to be free, and I didn't have to worry about her running away from me (Granny doesn't run), getting lost at the store, or someone snatching her. When people thought I wanted their opinion about treating her like a dog, I simply told them that leashes protect my dog, why wouldn't I want to protect my precious baby? (I got many more positive comments than negative ones, not that I cared either way.)

children respond better to hugging it out than going head to head with them...my son is now 4...and since he was 1..i have been disciplining with hugs first....first i will hug him and we talk about the situation calmly...he has turned into a sweet love bug b/c of this..he's still a wild child...but he will listen and we get through tantrums etc much smoother and quicker..
we also do this thing ..we have a chart..
1. blue zone..that's when he is being super good
2. green zone is neutral
3. yellow zone..misbehaving
4. red..bad..
5. black zone..in trouble

i got this chart idea from my son's school..18 months is too young i think for the chart but u take a clothes pin and write your child's name on it..then whatever zone they're in you put the clothes pin on...they have the chart at school..i don't have one at home i'm just able to say what color zone he is in and he immediately behaves again..
i've watched friends go head to head with their children ..and they're always frustrated..i hug and we talk about the problem..and it works..and we're all happier..

xo

D.

the best thing to do when they throw a fit like that is to ignore them, however when you are out walking, that is kind of hard to do. i would agree with taking a stroller. and when she throws a fit, pout her in and strap her down. I would not let her out at all, even if she settles down. that sounds mean, but i had this problem in stores with my daughter and I would put her in the cart but she knew if she calmed down right away i would let her back out and she would start being bad again in a few minutes. I started making her stay in the cart until we were through shopping, and the next time, she is much behaved. so, leave her in the stroller so that she knows she can't just stop and then get out and start all over. hopefully it only takes a couple of walks staying in the stroller for for to understand that mommy means business!!

I think that the best approach is "once and done." you tell her, "it's time to go now" (after having given her appropriate advanced warning - maybe countdowns in 5 minute incriments for the last 15 minutes at the park). If she throws herself on the ground, you pick her up, strap her in the stroller & go. No discussions. No getting mad. It's just matter-of-fact. I think that this will help take your son out of the mix as well.

She will probably scream and yell in the stroller. Just make sure that she is strapped in and safe. Better option than trying to carry a thrashing child.

The biggest gift that you can give her and yourself is consistency.

Good luck!

Put her in a stroller.

Sounds like the classic 'terrible 2's' to me. My son started that around the same age and it's not going to end until about 4yrs old. The 'terrible 2's' usually start within their second year of life... not actually the age of 2.

When I started to tell my son not to crack the cement, it got his attention that I wasn't catering to his tantrum. More often than not, I will pull a wagon with us in case he decides he's done. I have a seat with a seat belt type attachment so even if he's still having a meltdown, he's not going to hurt himself and we can still continue on our way home. This also saves my back. His sister is 7 and she freaks when I tell him not to crack the cement. Tells me it's mean, but then she realizes it stops him most often from continuing the tantrum.

Good luck! We all go through it. : )