I have a friend whose teenage daughter is having a lot of issues, ie. attitude, terrible temper, skipping classes, ignoring curfew, lying about where she's going, etc. Her attitude problems started when she was much younger but are getting worse as she gets older. My friend and her husband think one of her problems is that she is depressed. They are so frustrated. They have taken away everything but it hasn't helped. They are active in church and she is in the youth group but obviously she isn't listening to what is being taught. They recently had her start seeing a counselor. Anyway, can anyone recommend a good book that deals with this type of thing. Or, has anyone had experience with this and can offer some insight that I can pass on. ANY help would be greatly appreciated!
S.
First, they all need to be in counselling... it's not just her problem, it's a family problem.
Second, depression could well be part of it and meds are a huge help. A psychiatrist will need to prescribe meds.
I can't tell you a good book, but a good counselor is Lisa Lang ###-###-####.
From my experience with my oldest daughter, who will be 33 yrs old in 2 weeks, it sounds like there is a lot more going on. I will gladly share my experience with them if they would like. Just send me a private message.
You are a good friend! The best things my friends who had not been through what I was going through did was continue to be there for me and help me get away for some "sanity moments", even if just for a cup of coffee. L.
Stephanie, You are a good friend and as a mother of two teens (one boy 14 and one girl almost 17) and in today's world society is setting most of the values and different rules of what a parent can and cannot do to raise there own child (and raising of our teens no matter how hard we try to help or love them). The counseling may help only if the teen is open to it. I wouldn't just start or suggest meds unless she is fully evauluated (some just make them drown out the true issues and never get to the problems if they are beyond just being a teenager. This age is the toughest (at least for me and with my daughter) and alot of it may have to do with the friends she is associating with so you might want to suggest the mother meet all of her daughters friends (make sure she knows who they are) and talk/meet and get to know the parents. I also went onto my daughters computer and monitor this regularly (you might be surprised what you find out). We have also taken her to the doctor (family practice for drug testing and genol. exam) since she wants to be treated like an adult, she has to take care of herself. Sometimes they just want to be like others and it comes out in such a disrespectful way especially to the parents. Medications are not always the answer unless you definetly have her evauluated and again, she will need to be truthful and this age is hard to get them to say what is really going on. Prayer is what is helping me some, but tell your friend not to give up, be supportive, but don't give in either. In other words have consequenses for bad behaviour (disrespect, skipping school, etc) and ones that make it hurt. The important things need to be taken away not just like grounded for a weekend. Too many parents are not involved enough and like another respones said it is a family issue, but hopefully it will all work out. Your friend will be in my prayers. OH, a couple of books that were good were Parents who or That Love too much, How to Parent Your Teenager, and ag really neat book I bought for my daughter was Dreams Alive (Prayers by Teenagers. This was good to let her read and we always try to eat dinner together at the table and talk about our day. I hope this helps and it also reminds me that we are all struggling to face the problems of our teens, she is not alone. Send me a message if there is anything else you want me to look up or give any additional suggestions on here.
