To Share or Not to share...what to Do About Bedrooms

I had my own room but still slept on the floor in my older brothers room through elementary school. He was 2 years older. In retrospect I may have had some anxiety issues but I can just remember being really scared of the dark and our living room at night. I would have loved sharing a room even as an older child because it gave me security.

What about doing bunk beds in one of the children's rooms so that they can have both their independence and comfort when the times are right. A trundle bed would work to. One that you can pull out and put back.

Well my first question is that even though you may not mind her in there, does your husband? I have two young children and we are about to be a family of five in a(believe it or not) two bedroom trailer. I mean it is tiny. So I know all about space issues. My husband and I don't have much privacy because our daughters are 3 and almost 2 so at night time we are really glad that the girls have a bedroom to themselves that we can put them in. That is our time to talk or even just sleep in peace without kid interference. You may not mind her in there now but what about when she is older and still wants to be in your room? Kids get used to stuff pretty quickly and they don't react well to changes that they don't want. Maybe you can ask her is there any certain reason she doesn't want to stay in her room. I know she is only 3.5 but kids are smart. I would definitely keep their rooms seperate because your kids being different sexes, eventually they are going to have different interests. It is only natural. Hope I helped.

i would keep seperate bedrooms and encourage her to go back to bed in her own room. She is old enough to understand she needs to sleep in her own bed. My daughter who is 4 recently was getting up and coming into my bed (for about a week) complaining of bad dream, hurt tummy, whatever... being that i hate getting up at night I invited her into bed... but since none of us are used to sleeping like this my daughter, husband or myself were getting much quality sleep. So I told her that I expected her to stay in her bed... if she came down to my room I was going to tell her to go back to bed (and not get up and go with her) she asked what I meant and I said you will go to sleep in your bed and I expect you to wake up in your bed in the morning. She get it then... haven't had her come to my room since. I think she was getting up to potty and sense one night I let her come in bed because of a bad dream she kept trying it until I put a stop to it.
My girls share a room and believe me if I could give them their own room life would be much easier for me. But a family of 5 in a 3 bedroom house just doesn't work. I am sure also that your husband would rather not have a child completely move in to your room. (an infant is bad enough but a 3 year old- no way).
Whatever you decide be consistant. Hope this helps :)

I have 4 kids and have a 3 bedroom house (we also have a sunroom we turned into a bedroom). The 8mo is a girl and has her own room, the 4 year old twin boys share a room, and the 6 year old boy has his own room (the sunroom).

We have done a lot of room shuffling. But one thing is for sure, the kids have never slept in our room, with the exception of a stormy night or one of them being sick.

Before the baby was born the 6yo had a bedroom, the twins shared a room and the sunroom was the playroom. Then we moved the 6yo to the sunroom, gave one of the twins the other bedroom and everyone had their own space. When the baby came, we moved the twins back in together and gave the baby the other room. The oldest boy felt left out, so we moved him into the twins room and turned the sunroom back into the playroom. They ended up playing all night and the room was tight, so we finally settled on giving the oldest the sunroom, the twins sharing one room and the baby having her own room.

Out of all these situations, the current one is working the best. I did enjoy having one room with all the toys, but with our small house, this just isn't possible. The twins are use to being together and have adjusted to sharing the room. The oldest boy is in school now and enjoys having his own space away from his brothers.

My advice to you is to keep them separate in their own rooms. The longer you let your daughter sleep with you, the harder it will be to get her out later. You said her room is already decorated for her so maybe you can convince her with a new accessory for her room like a tent over her bed.

keep their bedrooms separate. in a year or so your daughter will ask for privacy then you'll have to redo again. my kids don't play well in rooms, that are meant to be bedrooms. instead i have a converted garage into their playroom (because our basement is unfinished). my 5 year olds share a room, and i have two empty bedrooms. i beg them to allow me to set up a bedroom for each but their interests (age) is the same so they don't want. i have not done anything with spare bedrooms because i know in no time they'll ask to be separated.
as for decorating, see, i suck at it. i did their room beautifully but i shed sweat and pounds trying to come up with ideas. i just don't have a decorating gene instilled in me :(

I agree with Rebecca, you should keep the seperate bedrooms. I think sharing is fine if you have to, but kids definitely like their space and you'll have less fighting later on over whose stuff is on whose side of the room. I shared a room with my sister for many years and we fought a lot. Finally our playroom was made into a bedroom and everyone was happier. Playrooms are probably only good when the kids are really young, but I don't really see the point since they will play in every room of the house I'm sure.

If you like having your daughter in your bedroom for now and she likes it too, then don't feel bad about wasting a room. She'll go back to it eventually I'm sure when she's feeling more independent. Just enjoy being close, someday she'll be a teenager and not wanting to hang out with you at all!

I would keep them seperate...if they were the same gender I might consider sharing but I say keep them the way they are. She will probably eventually go back to her room :) And I just have to say I love your name!! My daughters name is Cali and I think its gorgeous!!

Hello C.-

I worked with a family as a Nanny who had their girls share a room, they were 3 & 4 at the time. They enjoyed sharing the room, but when the oldest turned 6 she wanted her own space, so we converted an office into a bedroom.

With the age difference between your son & daughter, I think keeping both rooms would be best. She will start, (between 4 & 6), wanting privacy and alone time, but if you convert a room into a playroom, she won't have that space.

While the room seems empty right now, I bet your daughter feels it's here space, and if you take it away, she may feel sad, confused, rejected.

I hope this helps.

R. Magby

Keep separate rooms. When she is older whe will want her privacy.
OUt of neccessity I had to put three in one room in CA. Since then my girls share and the boys have each had their own. Yes, sometimes my youngest son, who is three years younger than the next child, would sleep with the girls. Sometimes my third would be in his room.
In 18 years she will graduate from college and move away. She will eat with silverware and sleep in her own room. She will take showers by herself and MOmmy won't be the first person she comes to when she needs a bandaid. The day my firstborn left was one of the hardest days of my life. Cherish the days you have with your babies.
And by the time my girls were three they slept through the night in their own beds. She'll get there, always start in her room and if you want her in her room then take her back every night.