Youth Football Game Cheating

Updated on November 01, 2013
M.C. asks from Joliet, IL
25 answers

Wanted some other M.'s opinions on my sons youth football game. They had a game where they were winning 21-0. In the last 5 minutes of the game the people controlling the scoreboard decided to add 20 points to the losing teams score so the game ended up being 21-20 at the end. I am extremely upset because I feel that it does not teach these kids how to lose gracefully. If kids continue to be "handed" everything at a young age, how will they know how to deal with failure as adults? My son played last season when this rule was not in effect and he got slaughtered at some games. He dealt with it and it made him want to improve his game. I will be writing a letter to the organization today, but just wanted to get some other opinions on this.

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V.K.

answers from Minneapolis on

Just recently there was a youth football game where one team beat the other team something like 91 to 0. The losing team is actually trying to SUE the winning team for "bullying". Maybe the people behind the scoreboard were trying to avoid being sued? It's ridiculous either way.

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K.D.

answers from Jacksonville on

I think its wrong on a few levels. Points should not have been added to the losing team-thats dishonest. But, the winning team should've been instrucetd to hold back a hit when it was obvious that it would be a blowout. On my daughter's soccer team, if the score is very uneven, the coaches put in the less skilled players to give them some more experience. Other teams have a passing rule they follow where they have to pass the ball so many times before scoring. There is losing gracefully, but also winning gracefully.

ADD: adding points is cheating, holding back so you don't have a blow out and humiliate the other team is not cheating.

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B.P.

answers from Cleveland on

My daughter plays youth soccer recreational and they don't keep score at all. But I'm hoping as she gets older and more advanced they will keep score that's the only way kids will learn to be a good winner/loser

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C.V.

answers from Columbia on

I think it's wrong too. If your team loses, they lose. You practice harder and play better next time. Giving them artificial points doesn't mean anything because they didn't actually earn those points. Every kid on that team knows they didn't earn the points. It's completely unnecessary and worthless to give them points they didn't earn, and defeats the good lessons that could be taught by a big loss.

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A.P.

answers from Washington DC on

So your son can deal with a devastating score, but you can't deal with a little kum-bah-yah?

You should follow your son's example and get over it.

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T.S.

answers from San Francisco on

Sign up for a different, more competitive league. Though I assume these kids are very young so your choices may be limited. Usually the younger programs focus more on skill building and less on scorekeeping.
In the meantime follow your son's example and deal with your own disappointment gracefully.

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D.D.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Well - is it a rule, or it's not a rule?
If it's a league rule, then it's not cheating (a strange rule, but not cheating).

If it's not a rule, then yes, it was inappropriate for the people running the scoreboard. But actually, it's not usually the scoreboard that keeps the official results, it is the home team recordkeeping. So the scoreboard doesn't really mean anything. After all, if you looked at game records that the home team should be keeping, it would have 0 for the points scored (because they would have to write down who score the points, pass, or run or field goal, etc, and those are all 0. And if you tried to just add scoring plays, you would mess up all the per-player stats).

Think of it this way - how often do you see officials in pro games make announcements for the game clock to be re-set to match the official time? All the time. They can do this because the scoreboard is not the official record-keeper.

So either way, I wouldn't get too bent out of shape over this.

ADDED: Interestingly, there is a recent huffpost article about the pointlessness of dishonest praise, and how kids don't really take pride when they know that the praise (or score, in this case) isn't deserved and that it undermines the credibility of the person or group giving the undeserved points (or praise). http://www.huffingtonpost.com/kyle/the-dangers-of-overcel...

If the link doesn't work, google "the dangers of overcelebrating our children"

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S.F.

answers from Fargo on

They did that in the last 5 minutes of the game? 5 minutes is a long time in football. What would have happened if the other team made their first goal during the final 5 minutes of the game? Would they have awarded the other team the win, even though they had not previously scored?

Research the rule and then make your case.

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A.S.

answers from Boca Raton on

Wow I've never heard of that! I think it's strange too.

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J.F.

answers from Las Vegas on

Completely wrong to do this. Kids do have to learn how to lose, and for heaven's sake, if they can't deal with losing a youth football game, these kids will have a rough go of it when life throws some real losses and disappointments at them.

This is one time where I think a letter to the organization's board asking for follow-up and correction of this procedure is in order.

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M.S.

answers from Columbus on

How old is your son? We have youth football starting in 2nd grade all the way up to middle school. Not that it matters, because I agree with Christy Lee. The kids know better, whatever age they are. I would think the kids wouldn't want "pity points", anyway. Instead of giving points that weren't earned, how about putting in ALL the kids. Again, depending on the age, if they are in elementary school, all those kids should be getting a turn on the field. Instead of running up the score, make sure each gets some decent playing time. That's more of a coach decision than a league one, but there's no reason to be adding points when they weren't earned. I wouldn't hesitate to voice your frustration in an email, but I wouldn't go bananas with protests or angry debate. I think if the kids are really young, they are just trying to give them some confidence, but not exactly the right way. Making sure those coaches they bring on build those boys up and not tear them down, is a better way to build confidence and an appreciation for the sport.

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A.G.

answers from Dallas on

Whether it is a rule or not, I think it is ridiculous.

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B.S.

answers from Lansing on

I wouldn't like it either.

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A.V.

answers from Washington DC on

I believe one of the leagues SS played in had a mercy rule, where the coaches could decide that the game could be ended if there was no way to win and one team had not yet scored. But nobody ever ADDED points to make it close. I think it's like not allowing less than a 50% on HW (which our district tried and abandoned). Kids decided that hey, a 50% was fine and they didn't do it. The adults thought it would be a motivator and 50% was still failing and the kids thought "I still fail, so why bother?" This points thing could go the same way. Sometimes you do fail...spectacularly...but at least you fail legitimately.

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L.R.

answers from Washington DC on

As others noted -- is it an official rule that scorekeepers can do this or did some scorekeepers do this on their own? Finding that out is important, I think.

If it's just something these particular scorekeepers did at this one game, yes, you could still complain and ask that the organization look into this and institute a clear policy that this can't be done.

If you are told it IS a rule, ask to see it in writing. The rules should be written down SOMEwhere, right? See if it says that scorekeepers, for instance, "may add points to prevent any difference in the final score from being greater than X points" or something like that. Of course that would be idiotic too but find out what it says in writing -- assuming it's really a "rule" and is really in writing somewhere.

And then when you complain, you can cite the exact language of the rule. That generally shows folks that you are giving due attention to what's on the books. If you want to fight not only this one game's outcome but the whole idea of doing this (and I sure see why you would want to do that!), then enlist other parents-- one letter from one parent can be ignored easily, but a petition or many letters from many different parents can't be dismissed as readily. I don't know these kids' ages; if they are older kids I'd say have them write letters too, but I think from the situation you describe that these must be very young kids and I wouldn't involve them in protesting this if they are indeed young.

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A.A.

answers from Tulsa on

While I think it's silly to add points, I promise those kids know that they didn't earn those points and that they "got slaughtered". Just because of what the scoreboard said doesn't mean they aren't learning to deal with failure. Find something worth it to worry about, this shouldn't be something to get so upset over.

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M.O.

answers from Chicago on

Seriously??? That's wrong!!

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J.B.

answers from Boston on

I sort of agree that it's wrong. There should be "slaughter" rules in play that are less heavy-handed to prevent totally humiliating, lopsided defeats but a 21-point loss in football is not that bad.

In hockey, at least in the leagues my kids have played in, there is a limit to the score differential. Something like after a team gets ahead by 6 or 7 points, the leading team's goals are no longer counted until the other team starts to score. Then if the score gap falls below the differential cut off, goals start counting again.

My oldest son's team played a team a couple of years ago that was leading 7-0 halfway through the first period. I had to give the other team credit because they handled it very graciously and just stopped shooting. That game could easily have been 20+ to 0 so I was glad not only that the rule was in place, but that the other team didn't continue to push the point by scoring "uncounted" goals. Winning gracefully is as important a lesson as losing gracefully.

At the end of the day, a win is a win and a loss is a loss.

M.D.

answers from Washington DC on

I've not heard of it and think it's strange. My son's team (4-6 year olds) were told to not run up the score several times, but if other teams did it, it was okay. We have both of our boys in baseball now. It's SO much better.

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C.B.

answers from San Francisco on

I agree with you completely. If they don't learn how to handle losses/disappointments, we are setting them up for failure in the future. This is the age of entitled children - they are ALL entitled to win; they are ALL entitled to a trophy; they should NEVER experience anything bad. We are going to have a generation of mass murderers because no one is going to be able to graciously handle losing/disappointment or sadness. Looking at the kids today, I am scared for the future and REALLY hope I don't live long enough to see our young generation in charge!

And I certainly don't think the winning team should have been instructed to hold back. Again, kids need to learn how to lose and win graciously. Holding back and adding points are cheating. I guess it's okay to cheat sometimes - end justifies the means??? Not in my book!

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B.A.

answers from Chicago on

Y

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B.M.

answers from Chicago on

I am sure the referees knew the actual score. I am sure that the score is recorded as 21-0. Someone was just playing around not that serious.

S.K.

answers from Denver on

in my sons basketball league (at the age where score is kept but not standings, 3rd grade) after half time if the winning team is up by 30 they will reset the score board. Is this fair? No and even if they were to lose, which I haven't seen happen it brings life back to the opposite team so they don't just "give" up. Of course this changes when standings are kept that way it doesn't take someone out of the ranks who really did win that game. but for now its just to keep everyone motivated

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K.F.

answers from Salinas on

That is weird. How old is your son? In our softball league the 8U teams don't keep score at all to focus on learning the game and having fun. Boring to watch but good for the girls.

Then 10U it's regular play and there are some VERY lopsided games.

My daughter was put on a very immature team for Fall travel ball because they needed pitchers and a team leader. It took some humility to get over the fact that as a player she clearly belonged on the stronger team but in the end she had one of the best sports experiences of her life. She played all games at pitcher or first, was looked up to by all the girls, developed her game under an awesome coach and LOST just about every game by a wide margin. Losing builds character more than winning IMO and isn't that the point of kids sports?

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D..

answers from Miami on

I don't quite understand your description here. You said that the rule wasn't in effect last season. Do you mean it is now a rule that they change the score to make it more palatable for the losing team? Or do the people running the scoreboard just have carte blanche to do whatever they want?

I don't quite understand people saying to get over this. You should be talking to the league about it. If they ignore you, tell them you will go to the town newspaper and talk to them about it. There's no point in keeping score at all if they are going to cheat.

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