4 Year Old

I can't belive you put your 4 year old to bed at 1, 2, 3 in the morning! You are being selfish and not considering what is healthy for your child. I understand it must be hard with your and your husband's schedules and you're trying to make things work, but you really need to put her health first. She should be in VPK, but even if you don't do that, she will be going to kindergarten soon and she needs to be on a normal sleep schedule. Sleep begets sleep. Sleep training when you are having issues can be time consuming and you need to have a lot of patience and you must be consistent. I had GREAT success implementing the Sleep Lady Shuffle, which is from "Good Night, Sleep Tight" - read more about it here: http://hubpages.com/hub/sleep-training-good-night-sleep-t...

Best of luck! Sorry if I came off harsh, I was taken aback by what you wrote that you were doing with her sleep schedule.

She's probably confused about the whole time sequence. She wants to spend time with each of you and both of you; by this time, she knows you're both coming and going, and it's confusing for her. This anxiety isn't goiing to help her sleep. The good news is that she can't allow herself to get sleep deprived -- a child that age will just fall asleep exhausted when her body can't take being awake anymore -- but the bad news is that while she has this anxiety about mom and dad coming and going, she may not be able to get all her sleep at the time you want her to. And she's not going to let you sleep as a consequence.

There are no easy answers. My suggestion would be for everyone to be on the same shift. That would mean getting her into daycare until she's old enough for VPK. Otherwise, perhaps a relative or friend would take care of her while you both work during the day?

I hope you find the best remedy for all three of you as soon as possible.

Peace,
Syl

I think she should be getting ready for bed at about 8 p.m. She should sleep about 11 hours. That way she'll be getting up at 7ish. Putting her to bed later will def not make her sleep better b/c an overtired kid will sleep poorly. Why isn't your husband doing the evening dinner-bath-bed thing from 6-8?

wow are you saying she sleeps like 5 hours a night? Is she sick a lot? Get your husband on the same page as you - your daughter needs WAY more sleep and you need to get the habit established now because she will be in school soon. Your pediatrician will at least be able to tell your husband that 1:15 is not an appropriate bed time by any means for a 4 year old. You said you get home at 6:30 and sometimes he leaves right before is there another caretaker that can help with this? I would suggest bedtime around 9 so she will sleep in a little for you - get your husband to understand how important this is for both you and your daughter to establish this part of the routine - and if she wakes up at 2AM getting actually up is not an option. She is 4 you can discipline her take TV away, take a toy away- something to make sure she knows her job is to go to bed at 9 get up at 8AM- Its not goign to be easy and your going to have to be consistent- If you can find some episodes of supper nanny there where some ood one with sleeping issues in them she does a good job of helping deal with this...

Little by little have him put her to bed 15 mins earlier every night until she is going to bed by 10, at least. She is missing out on huge critical brain development by not letting the normal melatonin come into her body when it should at 4 yrs old. She needs to sleep 11-12 hours straight so that would be somehting like 9-8am or somehting which would work perfectly for her getting up for school. This is a really bad pattern she has gotton into for the convenience of adults.

I agree she needs to go to VPK. She will burn some energy and be ready to sleep. Or take her to Tiny Tots (at the Parks and Recreation). It's also a free program a few days a week for 2 hours. Maybe consider a babysitter or nanny to help out. Do you have family around that can help? I too wonder if your child is sick all the time from lack of sleep. I hope you can find your answer from the posts and work something out.

Have u thought aboput putting her in a VPK program since she is 4

I think your best bet is to start slowly. Put her to bed earlier each night in 15 minute increments. It will take a few weeks, but then you can get her going to bed at a resonable time. I would start soon because if she is starting school in the fall, she will need to be in bed much earlier. Good luck.

I think you probably have gotten her so out of whack that she's overtired. Different things I have read have all said basically the same thing... you need to have your child on a schedule. Most kids do well going to bed between 7 and 8 and getting up somewhere btwn 6 and 8. They do much better when they have a consistent routine, and you shouldn't change that routine to accommodate your schedule. It's hard, I know, but you may have to find another way to get your sleep...maybe a part time nanny, or a friend or relative who can watch her for a few hours in the morning. Once you start consistently putting her to bed at the same time, she will probably start sleeping better, but it may take some time.