Amputation

Hi S.,
This is a tough situation but their are still other options then amputation. I do wellness work and am always learning about new techniques people are using with a lot of success. A red colored cold laser speeds up healing of all tissues and skin responds really well. A violet/red cold laser helps heal same as red but is even more effective for healing infections. I have a Violet cold laser made by Erchonia that is FDA approved for healing severe acne. It kills the acne bacteria( so it is anti bacterial). Manatech makes a product called ambertose that has glyco nutrients for cells. My Dad had wounds that didn't heal for6 months and once he made some changes including taking ambertose his woulds healed. Hyperbaric Oxygen is used for wound healing too. The new WIN Institute in Basalt has a hyperbaric chamber. The Synergy company makes a green superfood called Pure Synergy. The man who developed it was mangled in an auto accident and they said he would nr walk again, he had horrible infections and the docs wanted to amputate but he said no. He created synergy to help other heal. Where does your Dad live? I am part of a network of practitoners using some of the above techniques and tools in other areas of CO and the states. Blessings, S.

Hi S.,

I am so sorry to hear about all the health problems your dad has had to deal with and how losing his leg is affecting the whole family. I just want to share with you briefly that my dad lost one of his legs when he was 18 years old as a result of bone cancer. By the grace of God his cancer never returned after the amputation and he has lived a active and healthy life. He turned 80 in August! He still tries to walk with an artificial leg, but is becoming more open to using a wheel chair or scooter when needed. Fro me growing up with a dad with one leg was no big deal. We just accepted that was the way dad was. He was as active with us as any dad could be. My children who are now 6, 5 and 3 ask about grandpa's leg, but are not afraid of him at all. They understand that he is grandpa with or without a leg. And I think they are more compassionate and empathetic to others in wheelchairs, or with other handicaps. I would encourage your dad to find some support as he goes through this. And I pray your family can love for who he is and enjoy every minute you have with him! Blessings to you all. C. M.

This will be something he will adjust to if he choses to. All you can do as a Mom is to help educate your children. Let them know Grandpa has something that the dr needs to fix and it'll be a little bit before he can play with them again. There should be books to help you if you need (there seems to be a book for everything!!)

On my personnal note, Please dont let him wait too long to get it done. I never met my paternal grandpa b/c of something similar. He had a bad infection in his leg that he never went to get treated until it was too late. They tried amputating, but it had already spread. I'm not saying this to scare you at all! I just want them to keep their grandpa!!

GL, everything should work out. Kids are smarter than you give them credit for most times!
J.

never dealt with amputation, but heard of someone who had. A friend came to see him in the hospital. she was worried how he was holding out emotionally. His response was, "I knew that when the Lord came to get me, He'd have to take me a piece at a time!" Humour is the best medicine, and i believe it. Some situations are difficult to bear. but if he, and the rest of his family and friends, turn to God and be happy, learning how to be positive and not take yourself to seriously, the load will be lighter.

What a horribly difficult dilemma. My heart goes out to you.As an older person myself, I know how hard it is to age and have your body deteriorate. I have many friends who have gone through hard times, although probably not as hard as your Dad's. All I can say is, friends, friends, friends! They have helped rally me through many hard times. Get as many considerate friends to surround him with love and compassion. Is he religious? Clergy can help immensely. Hospice? I think they work with people who are not necessarily dieing. Check into that.My best wishes to you. The best thing you can do is let him know how much you love him.

My dad went through the same thing and now has half of his other foot amputated as well. I know the best thing is to ask him what he needs Does he and your mom going to need help getting to appointments at lest until he can figure out driving again depending on the leg amputated. Let him know that you love him and that with or without the leg he is still the man you know and love and respect. Men more often than not feel that they are losing who they are when the think that they can't do everything they used to do. They want to provide and feel respected. He right now is probably trying to figure tha out for himself right now and what his role will be after the amputation. My Dad says they are just burying him a peice at a time rather than all at once. Humor is what helps him. Help him with information the have a prosthesis that is made for running and one for walking. The biggest thing is letting him go at his own pace. He is going to have to relearn how to get around again. Whether it is walking, with a crutch or prosthesis or using a wheelchair r walker. All these things my dad used at first until he found what worked for him the best. Your kids will be fine and still love papa. Their questions will be the most honest and loving and he will know that he is still their papa. Maybe he won't be able to play the same at first, but please let him decide how much he can do. No it may not be the same but it will all work out. Your little guy will undestand that.

That's rough, S., best wishes for your Dad's recovery.
Keep it simple and positive. Seems that involving all the siblings with support for each other would be best, maybe brainstorming some fun things to do with Papa while he's recouping and afterward.
Don't forget about your self in this also, it must be traumatic to watch a parent go through this.
Again, best wishes,
A.

hey S.,
i'm so sorry for what your going through. but keep in mind that an amputation is a very small price to pay and that the consequences could be much more sever without it. there are also many options your father will have that were not available in as little as fifty years ago. he'll be fine. don't worry about your little boy, just let him ask questions. i'm sure the hospital staff wherever you are have excellent tools in teaching your children about this situation. also, just because he's getting an amputation doesn't mean he can't play with his grandchildren. while he's healing sure, but once that's done, there's no reason why he should have to give up the joy of playing with his grandchildren. and, if it were me, (i know this sounds cold) but try a little humor where your father is concerned. it's not the end of the world, just a little tweak. good luck

S.,

What a tough thing for your dad to be going through--I'm sorry. But let me give you a little perspective from a grandchild's point of view.

My grandpa lost his leg in a car accident in his 40s. He was 70 when I was born, so I never knew him without his wooden leg. Despite the prosthetic, he was one of the most active people I've ever known! He lived out in the country and was solely responsible for building fences (from scratch--he cut down the trees himself), baling and storing hay, caring for their horses, etc. He lived until he was 97 and he still made it a point to go for a walk every day, even if it meant just walking around in circles in his room at the nursing home.

I can probably count on one hand the number of times in my life I saw him without his wooden leg, and when I did I was not disgusted or scared; I just knew that was part of who he was.

Kids can be pretty matter-of-fact about these things. And there's no reason he can't still play with them after he's healed--it just may be in a different way than it used to be.

Anyway, hopefully this helped a little bit. Good luck and I hope everything turns out okay for your dad.

S. I'm sorry, this sounds really difficult. You feel like you are losing your dad but you are just losing the expectations you had of what he would to and be in your future. He is especially going through this too. But he will still be there for you. You still have your dad and the future but it's just going to be different. Not bad or distanced from him, just different. I just have advice for your youngest. Tell him that Papa is going to play differently from now on, that he's been sick, and that "we" are looking for new fun things to do with him. There is so much you can do with kids while seated, like thumb wrestling, drawing pictures, tickle wars, talking, you can even play catch etc. Neither of them is really going to change, they will still find ways to bond and make memories. When my dad was in a couple car accidents we had to stop swinging on his neck. He would come home from work and we would jump on him w/ our arms around his neck. I felt like I was losing my dad because this tradition was so important to me when I was like 8, but in reality this didn't distance me from my dad at all, I just had to find other ways to show him my love and play with him.

I'm sorry this is such a big change for all of you. Children can handle change amazingly well, and if you act like it's just change, not a horrible thing, and you are open with them, they won't be weirded out by it, or so nervous around him after the surgery, they'll just accept it. They will really pick up on your attitude. Good luck!

Hi S.- sorry to hear that you and your dad are going through such a tough time. Losing his leg will of course be very difficult and life changing. On the possitive side the advances they are making with prosthetics are amazing. My husband is a prosthetist and the technology now is very impressive. Prosthesis are now lighter and more adapatable to a person's imdividual needs. It will take time and hard work but there are alot of options out there now. Also- I don't know where he lives but there are some support groups in the area. There's one at Boulder Community Hospital (they meet there I'm not sure if it's "through" the hospital or not) and I'm guessing the VA in Denver would have one. I can ask my husband about one in your dad's area if you want- he would probably know.

My husband's uncle had some medical issues as well. It was diabetes that eventually cost him one of his hands, most of the fingers on another hand, part of a leg and part of his other foot. He was distraught. This was a man who was used to providing for his family and not depending on anyone. He became very depressed. His family rallied around him and gave him support. They listened to him and was there for him. They helped bring his spirits back up. It's easy enough to tell someone that they will be able to continue to live without these limbs, but it's another thing for the person to accept it and want to continue on.

With the help of his family, he got through his recovery and physical therapy. He got a specially made car for him so he could still drive. There was some worries at first that the kids would be afraid of his hands, or lack of. To be honest, the kids in the family found it fascinating. We made sure not to make a big deal out of it and they were welcome to ask any questions and even touch his hands. In fact, they started to think it was interesting. Since then, no one looks at him any different. He was able to adjust how he does things in order to still be independent.

I believe it is important to be there for him emotionally, to begin with. It can be a long road to accepting the lose of a part of your body. There is also the process of relearning your independence by using a prosthetic or a wheelchair.

I hope everything goes well for your father and your family!