Angry 7 Year Old, Please Help!!!!

He's a boy I know its hard but you have to lay down disaplin If you dont he'll think its ok to do all this even if you yell at him take away gameboys eletronics say he's groundes or other thing that make him sad

Has he always been this way or is this something more recent? Anything going on with him at school or with another kid at school or his teacher?

Would you consider talking with his pediatrician and maybe consider a behavior specialist or professional counselor/therapist of some kind?

ETA: After reading your edit at the beginning, I would not accept the whole "boys will be boys" statement - it's enough of an issue that it causing some major disruption in your lives and who knows what he will be like when he is 13 or 18 if he continues this way. I would be seeking a second opinion and looking into professional psychological help pronto.

Our son had anger issues last year (he was 6 then, now he's 7). It only happened when he did not get his way. He seemed out of control for a while though - we even went and talked to a child therapist to see if they had any advice. I made some changes and either he outgrew it or these things worked very well with him (for the moment anyway). I talked to him about his anger and we went over and over and over what appropriate responses would be. I read the book the Kazdin Method for Parenting the Defiant Child and followed the advice in the book. This worked very well for us. The other thing I did was I started being very black and white about things. I explained it to him beforehand. If I asked him to do something (for example, stop playing a video game and get on shoes to go out to the bus stop) and he would not do it, I would count to three (reminding him if I got to 3 the consequence would be X (in this example it would be no video games for the next 24 hours, so the rest of the day after school as well as the next morning). It had to be a consequence of something he LOVES to do (so for him the only things that worked are no video games, no screen time, no bike riding, no skatepark, no family golf night). If he still did not listen then no video games for the next day as well. After a few times of him getting no video games for a week or 4 days or even for just the next day, he realized we mean it and now he does what we ask by the count of 3. Basically he learned there's no messing around anymore. He gets asked once, then there is a count of 3 and then there is ALWAYS a consequence he hates if he does not do what he's asked. I know that's common sense but it's just that we really made a conscious effort to not get distracted and ask him things many times. We became much more black and white...it is now the same every time. The other method, the Kazdin Method is all about positive reinforcement and you pick a very specific behavior you want to change. Every thing we have done this method on has gone great! I really recommend it and I need to continue to use it. Anyway, that is just my advice but I know every child is very different and what works on one does not work on another.

My son started behaving similarly when he was 7. For me, I noticed that when he would 'blow up', was when it had been a while since he had eaten or drunk anything. So then when he would 'blow up', I would tell him to stop, and come to the kitchen while I got myself a drink. While I was getting myself a drink or snack, I would ask him if he wanted one. He would usually say yes. Then after a few minutes of snack time, I would talk to him about why he got mad. He would usually calm down and then go back and do whatever was asked.

When you do get angry, keep your voice regular/low. Do not yell. The more he gets angry the 'calmer' you get.

As for the singing/talking out of turn. keep a journal. Have him make notes or draw instead of singing/interrupting. Just make sure that the teacher knows that the book should stay available to him.

1) he needs to learn coping-skills, per his emotions & frustrations.
Not even some adults, have learned this.

2) he needs to learn how to talk about his feelings, and be allowed to. Some boys grow up, thinking they have to be all strong and silent, per that is how boys are and should be. But any child, has to learn to express themselves and how. Even an adult.

3) So, has anyone just asked him, "why" he is so angry???

4) He does not have impulse-control. He in school/at Church, gets into trouble because he is impulsive. Cannot control his reactions, at-will.

5) A kid cannot just get what they want. They need to learn 'right and wrong'. It just is.
Kids sometimes act like that to get what they want. Don't give in to him.

6) He has a sibling. Do they get along?

So many possibilities.
But, a kid has to learn they cannot act like that.
Maybe talk to your Pediatrician.

Also, try Google Searching "7 year old development" or, "7 year old emotional development."

Dr. Sears has some good advice on helping kids cope with anger and other discipline tactics:

http://www.askdrsears.com/html/6/T060100.asp

helping the angry child:
http://www.askdrsears.com/html/6/T061700.asp

how parents can cope with their anger:
http://www.askdrsears.com/html/6/T061800.asp

Sounds like you have a little boy who wants more control over his life. This could be a good thing a few years down the line, but right now the part of his brain that allows him to control and channel his impulses is still developing.

You can actually give him more control while giving him less-visible guidance of your own with the techniques offered in a practical book called HOW TO TALK SO KIDS WILL LISTEN, AND LISTEN SO KIDS WILL TALK, by Faber and Mazlish. This book is set up as a workshop, in each chapter introducing and illustrating principles in a way that allows you to "practice" and then look for real-life examples.

The principles are sound and well-tested, and honestly, this wonderful book can help you bring out the best in your boy. You'll find ways to connect with him respectfully and empathetically, give him the chance to solve many of his own problems, and support him along the way.

Kids who are supported in finding their own solutions can be original and creative, and tend to be really invested in making them work. I've seen some pretty amazing turn-arounds in several young families who started using this book, and it's been my favorite parenting book since I started using it with my grandson when he was 2.5, and becoming a very assertive little guy. I spend at least one day with him most weeks. He's now almost 5.5, and we are a joyful, mutually respectful team.

I cannot recommend this book to you highly enough. You may find other books that augment and assist, too, but this is a marvelous place to start.

I'd get him into an organized sport or a solitary sport like wrestling or karate. I truly believe that would help him learn self control. Piano lessons might be a good thing too. He sounds like a pretty sensitive type kid, probably smart as a whip, just doesnt have the right avenues to express himself yet.... try to provide them if you can.

Lysa, I hear you loud and clear. I am sorry, but I do not agree that "he's a boy" and "he will out grow it". We are hearing too much of that now, it's time that someone takes responsibility. It is up to us parents to see what is really going on and do something about it.
I often blog about this topic: http://heyyougetreal.com/momblog/category/behaviour/
Read some of my posts, you may just find the answer you are looking for.

Try reading "The Explosive Child" Our youngest has a very hard time controlling herself once she is in a full rage or explosion. And she would blow up over such little things, we felt like we had to walk on eggshells around her. It was getting ridiculous. Like you, we tried punishments, rewards, none of which really helped at all. This book helped us tremendously. We changed our approach with her, and it has been a lifesaver.