Bedwetting in Older Kids

It is more normal than you think. My husband was a teenager and still had to be woken up by his parents every night to get out of bed and go to the bathroom. That said...he remembers taking some pill before spending the night at a friends house or going to summer camp. This should not affect his life. Sounds like his doctor is indifferent, at best. I would try a different pediatrican before giving up. Best of luck to you!

I don't have any advice really, just support to offer. I have an almost 8 year old with the same issue. I've been told he'll grow out of it. We use the Goodnites as well. We've tried waking him in the middle of the night, but he is so sound asleep, even if we get him into the bathroom he won't go. He is more upset if we just let him wet the bed, so we stick to the Goodnites. Just know you are not the only one dealing with this. My 5 1/2 year old son has been dry at night since he started potty training, so I guess their bodies are just different. I wish you the best!

I'd suggest getting an evaluation and assistance from a specialist. This does not need to go on. I'm a grandma now so obviously my son's experience is dated, but we were told it is not particularly unusual with boys, especially deep sleepers and an 'immature' splincter(?) muscle. The specialist did put him on medication at night to make it less likely to wet, no liquids after 7pm, and a mat on the mattress which would trigger a sound to wake him up if it got wet (the idea was to train his body to come out of deep sleep when he needed to urinate). Then he'd get up and finish going, put a towel on the bed and go back to sleep. At first it just woke me up but soon it worked for him. I have no idea what the protocols are today but I can't believe your son has to wait for puberty!

Hi M.,
My son was a bedwetter until about age 12. He grew out of that, but as a young adult has been diagnosed with obstructive sleep apnea. The dr said prolonged bedwetting can be a sign in children, so if you child is snoring in addition to bedwetting, you may want to discuss this with your pediatrician. I wish I'd known earlier!

If night wetting continues past the age of 6-8 an assessment by a pediatric urologist is indicated to exclude any physical reasons for it. If your doctor is an urologist and has given your son a thorough examination, he might be right - in any case a second opinion never hurt anyone...

Hi M. - Has the peditrician done any testing to check for additional medical problems (including small bladder or other mechanical structure issues)? I ask because a friend of mine had that with her 7 yr old son. It ended up being a simple surgery to fix the issue & he is doing much better. It is tough when kids are older & still having bed wetting issues. A few of the things that we have tried with my oldest (and he is much better with his accidents) is to limit fluids beyond a set time, he also tries to make a game when he goes potty (seeing how high he can count during that time, to "sinking" TP squares, etc). One thing to consider (you may have already tried this) but to wake him up at set times during the night to try to go potty (we got our son an alarm clock so he can be responsible to do that himself - he likes that he is in control of that).

Let your son know that he is NOT the only kid with this but it is just something that other kids just dont talk about. We even had our peditrician talk with our son & he seemed better hearing it from the DR that it was ok & that they would find a solution. If they have not ran some of the basic tests (like the pee in the cup ones) and even ones to check the structure of his bladder, etc, that might be a good step if that is where the possible issue is. If your dr brushes it off again, go get a second opinion! This too shall pass. God Bless

M.,
We recently talked to our sons pediatrician about this same problem. He said that a bed wetting alarm is the most effective treatment. Good luck!

Hi M.,

My daughter had the same thing and we found out that it was allergies that did it. To be specific it was a milk allergy so we took her of all milk, cheese, yogurt, ice cream - anything with milk for three weeks to a month and then see if they improve and then give them a glass of milk and see what their symptoms are and if they still wet the bed and that will tell you if that is what they are allergic to.

N.
Health and Wellness Coach

Take him to the dr immediately. There is a word for that and they can give him medicine to help him.
That shouldn't be happening at his age.
GO TO THE DR
I can't beleive that your pediatrician hasn't done anything about that by now. Find another dr that is more thorough and who cares.

You are not alone - my 9 year old twin daughters have the same problem. We have tried all of the suggestions given. One thing that did help a bit was to cut dairy products out of the diet. I am also waking them up each night which and that has been working. They are like zombies when they sleep . Good luck and let your son know that it is a common problem just not talked about:)

howdy. I am a 30 year old female and in all honesty I wet the bed off and on till I was 18. my mother did as well till she was 21. we both were extremly heavy sleepers and i have a smaller then normal bladder. I finally stopped when I wet the bed while sleeping next to my then fiance'. not sure what made me stop I just know i did. I am sorry for what your son is going through but he is not alone. It is hard to stay the night at a friends house or have a friend stay at yours when you have this problem. I wish you both the best of luck and send my thoughts and prayers to you.

M.

As soon as his hormones kick in it will stop. You're almost there. Yes I had lots of experience with this and it was the hormones that worked for our little guy now quite tall.
I learned that it is more common than anyone would think but people did not and still for the most part don't talk about it.

This is more common than you think.

There are exercises to strengthen the pelvic floor - try asking a yoga or pilattes instructor for this information.

Also, have him take time in the evening to unwind. To read to relax, avoid too much tv/video games as they get him in his head and out of touch w/his body's signals.

My son has a couple of hours in his room everynight where he can do anything he wants as long as he is learning or studying something. He can read, study music, work on electronics, no tv/video games - real hands on learning. We started this when he was about your sons' age, at first he was a little resistant, but then he started getting into it and now he counts on that time to do his own learning. It has been a way for him to get to know how he learns and develop his own interest. It has helped him be aware of his energy and his body, which are good things for everyone. Boys tend to get in caught up in their heads and quite time where they can study how they want to is very interesting to watch. It is often a blend of drawing/doing/creating/learning and moving around that seems to help him know himself. It has been great for his confidence and he doesn't miss the tv at all. He does however enjoy sharing what he has created/learned.

Help him become more aware of his body and slow down the mind.

Also, there is a homeopathic that can be helpful for bedwetting.
Help him to recognize that he is much more than this situation.

Hi M.,

I was a Nanny for a child who wet the bed at 10 as well. There is medication, but it can be hard on the kindneys. If you haven't already, wake your son before you go to bed so he can pee later in the night, and you may want to set an alarm to send him to the bathroom in the middle of the night.

If none of this works, I'd talk about this more with his doctor or seek a second opinion. This is really hard on your son, it was for my charge, and I think your son's doctor needs to take this more seriously. Yes, he'll out grow it, but it's still hard on him.

Good Luck-

R. Magby

I wet the bed until I was about 13 years. I got abused because of it. It's actually quite a sensitive topic for me to completely talk about. What my parents put me through because of bedwetting I will never punish my son or any other child the way they did.

Please be patient with him - he will out grow it. Yes, let him know he definately not the only one.

have you tried eliminating dairy?

M.-
My son is 11 and still wears good nights too. Many of his friends are also still using them. Your son is not the only one. My son goes on sleepovers and pretends he's shy and gets dressed and undressed in the bathroom. We pack an extra bag to bring the dirty pull up back home so no one knows.

Do talk to your pediatrician, but mine said that most boys grow out of it around 12 or 13, but rarely do you see goodnights in college. He's a funny guy. My son's only physiological problem is sleeping like rock. He goes into a very deep sleep and even waking him up doesn't always help. I was told by another mom that her older boys all used a medication after age 12 or 13. They were only on the medication for a short time.

Also, I've been told that this is very common in preemies. Their little bodies are still trying to catch up with their peers. Was your son a preemie?

S.

I can definitely sympathize with your situation, M.. We've been through this with our son, and our daughter was a bed-wetter longer than most, too. With our son, we did a sleep re-training program through a non-profit organization recommended by the famous pediatrician, Dr. Brazelton. It costs a bit, but 1. they were the least expensive of this type service I found, and 2. had the most thorough training, including consideration of possible food allergies, that I saw in no other program. Other programs cost in the thousands while they were in the hundreds (at the time, anyway; not sure what their current charges are). Here is their website, if you'd like to check them out:http://www.hargitthousefoundation.com/ . I hope this helps! It worked miracles for my son. For a year or 2 after treatments, he would still have occasional accidents, mainly when he was getting sick - it was always a hidden clue for us! But at nearly 10 years old, he hasn't wet the bed now for nearly a year.

Hi M.,
Try taking him to a chiropractor. I read something a few years ago about kids who have this problem that they rebreathe the carbon dioxide that they have breathed out and this can cause the muscles to relax. Chiropractic helped with this from what I remember.

No, he is not alone. My son is 9 and still does this also. We also have a friend who is also 9 and still does the same. I got to a point where I told him that I will not buy the pull ups anymore...it seemed like they were a subconscious excuse to keep peeing in them especially at night. So, I got into the habit of putting all kinds of bed protectors in under the sheets, and he puts or keeps a towel next to him. He has also learned to recognize when he is wet and will now wake himself and change clothing and put the towel down so he can go back to sleep.It has been a long process and patience has been the key as well as making him aware (he would wake in the morning thinking he stayed dry, but wreaked like pee) It won't stay like this forever, my son is a hard sleeper and that is what we had to get past...I wish you well and please let your son know that he is not alone. There are so many others with this same problem.

I like your son was a bed wetter. I wet the bed till I was 12 just like my dad. It was something that I just had to grow out of like I am sure is the same with your son. I wish I had a solution for you but I think the doctor is right and puberty will probably be the answer