Boys and Ear Piercing?

Updated on June 20, 2012
J.D. asks from Rochester, NH
27 answers

While sitting at the dinner table tonight, my 14 and 9 year old sons both told me they would like to get their ears pierced… both ears. I didn't think I would have such a problem with it. If someone were to ask me if I thought they should let their boys get their ears pierced I would have said... why not! It wouldn’t bother me. If they were rude or acted terrible, that would bother me.

After all I was 8. It doesn't seem to be an issue when a girl gets her ears pierced at any age. If they change their minds later on they can always take them out. But, I’m not sure. I didn’t say yes or no. If my daughter were to ask me now at age 3 I wouldn’t hesitate. At least, I don’t think I would. My boys are good boys and very clean cut. Just wanted your thoughts.

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J.B.

answers from Boston on

I'm cool with piercings on teens of either gender. I don't like pierced ears on younger boys, but I honestly hate pierced ears on little girls too.

When kids are old enough to actually own their fashion choices, I'm pretty much an "anything goes" kind of person as long as those choices aren't sexually provocative or inappropriate for a specific setting. My SD is 14 and has double piercings and has dyed red streaks in the underside of her blond hair for a couple of years. I think the look is a bit cheap and trashy, but she likes it and cleans up nicely for holidays and family functions so...whatever. If my 14 year old son wanted his ear(s) pierced I would have no problem with.

4 moms found this helpful

S.G.

answers from Grand Forks on

I would be fine with the 14 year old, but I would probably make the 9 year old wait until he was 12 or so. As far as one ear or both, I would go with whatever the style is amongst his peer group. No point in having him get one ear pierced if it would be an embarrassment for him. Around here men in their 30's and 40's have one ear (as was the style in the 80's and 90's), but teens and 20's have both.

3 moms found this helpful
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S.B.

answers from Kansas City on

The 9 year old probably only wants to because big brother wants to. If you're comfortable with both of them doing it, why not? Now's the time for them to experiment with looks if they want.

3 moms found this helpful

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S.H.

answers from Honolulu on

Its fine.

Just a story: when I was a kid, I pierced my own ears.
Used ice and an apple in the back.
Then I went out to the living room, told my parents "I pierced my ears! Look!" I was really excited and wasn't doing it to irk them. I just did it myself. Cleaned it before and after. Sanitized the earring I used and had sharpened the tip with, to pierce my ears.
I did not get an infection at all.
Mind you, this is in addition, to the pair of earring holes I already had, which my parents got for me previously.

I also had a mohawk and different colored hair, and was into punk.
Was I a weird kid? No.
Was I a bad kid? No.
Was I rude or a terrible kid? No.
Am I still that way? No.
I was a kid then.

How did my parents react? They were unperturbed about it. They didn't flinch. My Mom just said "keep it clean!" Mind you, my parents are typical standard parents. Not liberal or anything. From an earlier era.

8 moms found this helpful
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D.K.

answers from Pittsburgh on

They are more than old enough to decide. If they decide they don't like it later on, they can just stop wearing an earring and the holes will close up.

ETA: I misread their ages as 14 and 19. I would still be great with the 14 year old. The 9 year old I would make wait. I did mine in high school and I don't see that waiting should be a big issue. Of course if he was 19 - then whatever he wants to do with his ears is fine.

7 moms found this helpful

A.G.

answers from Dallas on

I agree with the others. My boys are 8 and 14, and so far have not expressed a desire for earrings, but my 14 year old has had some pretty awful hairstyles. I let him know which styles I prefer, but also let him know it's his hair, and he can decide what to do with it. The earrings are the same thing. If the boys are good kids, like yours and mine are, I'm not going to get too worked up over simple things like earrings or hairstyles (or clothes or other personal choices). I'll just be thankful that they make good choices when it comes to the important things in life.

Fortunately right now he has chosen a great hairstyle! We'll see how long it lasts. :)

7 moms found this helpful

T.M.

answers from Redding on

my son got his pierced at age 8 for his bday. He was a very good kid. He was on a wrestling team so I think he wanted it for intimidation purposes, plus his dad wore an earring, so I let him. He quit wearing it at 18 and hasnt worn one since. (gotta love maturity)
I don't like two pierced ears on guys tho, I think it looks crappy... but I'm old so that's probably why.
I'd worry they would want those gauges tho-- those are pretty awful looking... so if I had an 8 yr old now that asked for a pierced ear I might be more inclined to say no just for that reason.

6 moms found this helpful
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M.M.

answers from Dallas on

I wouldn't have a problem with it. And just to be aware, you should check their dress code at school, it may not allow for it unless of course you homeschool.

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D.P.

answers from Sacramento on

My personal preferance is that boys keep short hair and no earrings. Realistic probably not.

5 moms found this helpful

C.O.

answers from Washington DC on

My husband would say NOT ONLY NO BUT HE$$ NO. When you turn 18 and a legal adult - do what you want with your body...

I PREFER my "men" to be clean cut and no piercings. I would ask that they wait. But also ask WHY they want their ears pierced. Unlike a tattoo - should they change their mind - they can take them out and the holes will close up.

They are YOUR kids. Go with your gut!!!

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H.W.

answers from Portland on

ETA: Oh, boy, I read this incorrectly... I thought you wrote that your boys were 14 and 19. That said, I'll have to change my answer-- the fourteen year old- yes, if he wants to care for the piercings, but the 9 year old should wait until he's 13. 13 would be my rule if it was for a boy or girl.

Here in Portland, it doesn't seem to be a big deal for a boy to have both ears pierced. Certainly more common on the men.

Deleted previous answer...for obvious reasons.

4 moms found this helpful

A.M.

answers from Kansas City on

at 14 i'd be okay with it - assuming he paid for it himself. at 9, no. i would say, set an age that you are okay with, and hold them both to it.

4 moms found this helpful

T.S.

answers from San Francisco on

My daughters both had theirs done around 9/10 (because that's when they were ready and mature enough to take care of them) so I wouldn't be concerned about the age.
It must be considered cool where you live because around here almost no boys have any piercings.
If it's a "norm" in your community and you think the boys are mature enough to be responsible for the cleaning and upkeep, then why not?

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B.K.

answers from Albuquerque on

The 14 year old I would allow, the 9 year old it would depend on maturity level. I know I wouldn't let my daughter pierce hers until later because she wasn't mature enough to care for it.

4 moms found this helpful

M.B.

answers from Orlando on

I would let my 6 year old boy if he wanted it, I have no problems with piercings.

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S.G.

answers from Chicago on

I would only let the 14 year old get them done and have the nine year old wait until he is fourteen. Go with what you think.

4 moms found this helpful

R.B.

answers from La Crosse on

When my oldest wanted his ear pierced I made him wait until he was 12. I figured by that age he was old enough to choose if he wanted his ear pierced or not and be able to take care of it by himself.

I was right. In (almost) 4 years his ear has never gotten infected or anything.

On the other hand he wants his other ear pierced... I told him no. I personally don't like both ears pierced on boys/ men. IMO it looks girly. I told him that was something he could do when he is 18. But he is getting an industrial bar in the same ear that is pierced for his 16th birthday ( in a couple of months).

I know that probably doesn't make any sense to anyone else but me.. but that's where I stand with it ;)

4 moms found this helpful

X.O.

answers from Chicago on

Age 14? Sure, Age 9? A bit young to make that decision, but if he were a girl I'd say ok. I'd let them both do it.

(ETA) my mom pierced my ears when I was 5, and I never had an infection. The 9 yr old is plenty old enough to care for it. And, after all, it is just a piece of jewelry. If he changes his mind he can take the stud out and let it close up again.

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☆.A.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Personally, I'm more concerned with what's on the inside of my kid than the outside. And self expression is important to me.
And it's not visually permanent--like a tattoo. They can be removed for certain occasions, situations.
My husband is the O. who would have an issue with it in our house.
Honestly, it is so common now, I barely notice when a boy has his ear(s) pierced.
That said, my 9 year old son probably has 2 friends that do--definitely the minority.

3 moms found this helpful

A.H.

answers from Anniston on

I personally would make my son wait till 16 for that, but at the same time when i see younger boys with earrings i dont think nothing of it. so either way i think is fine. on the other hand i know for a fact my husband would say NO lol

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K.B.

answers from Detroit on

At 14, I don't think it would be a big deal, but I wouldn't let the 9 year old - I would make him wait until he was 14, like his brother. But I would rather it was just one ear, not both.

3 moms found this helpful
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S.H.

answers from St. Louis on

my older son (age 24) had his ears pierced....hmmm, age 12?

& then we went thru the stupid gauging. Hated that phase.

& now he's removed both earrings. Probably 3-4 years ago. & I'm so thankful. I hated the gauging. Don't mind studs or small hoops, tho'.

at this point, my younger son (age 15) has zero desire to be "like his brother". & I am thankful.

I honestly believe it is now passe. Not many boys doing it anymore.

3 moms found this helpful

K.M.

answers from Chicago on

14yr old, yes and only one at at time, most of the boys with both look silly IMHO, the 9yo and your girl will both have to wait until 14 per the rules of my home.

2 moms found this helpful
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C.W.

answers from Washington DC on

No. wouldn't allow it. Sadly, stereotypes still exist. I would have to draw the line at that.

2 moms found this helpful
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C.N.

answers from Baton Rouge on

If they're old enough to ask for it, they're old enough to have it done. The sex of the child is irrelevant.

1 mom found this helpful

S.T.

answers from Washington DC on

why not?
it's awesome that they're good and 'clean cut' (what DOES that mean any more?), but even if they weren't, holes in their ears probably wouldn't change 'em.
i myself would probably have the 9 year old wait a little, although if he is a particularly responsible kid i might relent. i think kids (boys AND girls) should wait to get piercings until they're old enough to care for them independently. i really like the idea of a piercing being a rite of passage.
i really don't get being okay with piercing a toddler girl but not a teenage boy. who has a better sense of his/her body?
khairete
S.

1 mom found this helpful
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B.C.

answers from Los Angeles on

I don't think boys should have their ears pierced. I also don't think boys should wear bras and slips and nightgowns. Boys shouldn't bring their girlfriends over to their homes and sleep with them either even though some moms have said they have caught their sons doing it.

I know others are doing it. But that doesn't make it right or proper. I'd not let my sons get their ears peirced even after they lower my casket into the ground. Fortunately, I taught them well enough that none of them have had their ears peirced.

Good luck to you and yours.

1 mom found this helpful
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