Changes?

I am so sorry you guys are going through this and even MORE sorry for that little man of yours. I don't know really what could be wrong and since I don't know the mother it is hard to guess, but has your husband taken him out alone and just talked to him about his life. Maybe if he takes him at a time when he is not so upset and talks with him he might get him to say something. Kids dont always comunicate well especailly when they are upset. I think if dad starts off with easy stuff and then maybe talks to him about his life and what is going on at moms house maybe he might open up a little more. That is if you havent tried that already. I would be worried as well so I think you are doing the right thing by staying on top of it as much as you can. I don't know but if his mother is ignoring you guys telling her something is wrong than i would really be questioning why she wouldnt want to help her son. I think you might find that the problem is over there. I wish I could give you more. Dont give uup though, something is wrong and that little boy needs you two. Good luck and I hope you guys figure it out.

It does sound like he is worried about his mom in some way. He may have been told by his mom not to tell anyone or maybe the boyfriend threatened physical harm to him, his mother or his dad so he wouldn't tell. Isn't that usually why kids don't speak up when something bad is happening? Why else wouldn't he share with you guys? I would seek professional help here asap. He is carrying some kind of burden and it is too much stress for a 10 year so he is crying but not talking. I feel so sad for him. Good luck.

Is there a way that your husband could talk alone with his son's mother? Perhaps meet in a public place for coffee. She needs to know that this is happening. She's aware he's calling more often. You're not telling her something she doesn't already know.

Have you listened in to your step-son's end of his calls to his mother? What he says could give you clues about what he's concerned about.

It sounds like from your description that he's not saying he doesn't want to be at your house but cries about something and isn't able to tell you why he's crying. Is that the case? And he wants to call his mother often.

I also think that something is going on at his mother's house. I wonder if the mother or step-father are making threats about him not being able to come back home. I know a mother who makes those kinds of threats when she's angry. He could, also, be concerned about his mother's welfare. Could they be saying negative things about your home so he's feeling torn between the two homes? Could he have told his mother that he wants to live with you and she's said OK, you just do that. Probably in anger. Or threatened to not let continue to see you?

I also agree with Shannon's suggestion that his father or you, which ever one he seems to be most comfortable and open with, to take him out for ice cream or something that he likes and gently talk with him about what is troubling him or what life is like with Mom.

You could do this in a non-threatening way by telling a story about a little boy is seems upset and cries when he visits his Dad's family and then ask him what he thinks might be going on. Then continue the story based in part on his answers. I know, it sounds like he'd catch on and not answer which is possible but it's likely that he'll go along with it.

He does have the symptoms of depression. If possible, have him continue counseling over the summer.

It sounds like he talked with the school counselor as if everything is OK. Did they not talk about the tears and phone calls?

Could it be as simple as when he is with you he thinks she might leave again?