Hello,
I need help! I have six children who really don't like to clean up and needless to say I just can't keep up. It is sad but, true my 2 year old is the best one to help me out. Does anyone have a good chart idea to get them going? I have three boys 10,6,5 and three girls 3,2,6mos. They share a room (boys in one and girls in the other) thus the smallest mess from each one is just disasterous. They have a play room in the basement that doesn't get picked up either. We have taken things away when request are not met. I would like them to have daily or weekly jobs. They like to complain that I didn't get that out and I try to explain that I don't dirty all the dishes, or laundry either but, somethings just need to be done. We really can't afford an allowance so, their reward is to spend time alone with myself or my husband. We do have tubs for the toys in the basement but, things don't get put back. I can get one room clean and they will migrate to that room b/c they have more room to play so, within 20min that room looks like I didn't do anything. It gets very embrassing. My kids don't have friends over b/c of the mess they have in their rooms and basement.
Thanks for your ideas!
A.,
One thing that I have done is go through all of the toys every 3 months or so, and get rid of everyting that is not age appropriate and/or broken.
Another thing that may be fun is to those large laundry buckets. It is a great place to put toys!
Every evening at a specific time, have all kids, take 15 min to pick up the toy room.
Do this for their rooms as well... Hope this helps!
Good Luck!
T.
I might be a big meanie, but when stuff doesn't get picked up around here, I get rid of it. Usually, they don't even ask about it, but, if they do, I just explain that I thought they didn't care about it anymore since they left it on the floor like garbage. I tell them that I donated it to charity so that some little boy or girl who appreciates and takes care of their toys can have it. For awhile, it will seem like you're getting rid of all of their great toys, and it will make you feel sad and guilty. You'll be over that once you realize that you've walked through thte entire house w/o killing your foot on yet another action figure/barbie shoe. Kids are stubborn, though, and they may not change their ways at first, just to see if you can stick to your guns. They'll really start missing those toys, though, and, when they know you mean business, they'll be a little better about picking up. If not, eventually you won't have to worry about picking up after them or harping about it because there won't be anything to pick up. :-P It seems harsh, but it's what it took for my oldest two to get it together, and, really, if they have so many that they can just leave them lay, they have too many, right? Good luck!
Flylady.net is a wonderful system to helping you get your house decluttered and clean. She gives you something to get done each day and makes it fun, too.
Target has a really cute chore chart in the office area by the calendars and dry erase boards that you might like.
I just read an article about how to discipline with respect. It said to take away things that coincide with the problem. For example, if "Matthew" leaves out a set of blocks and you have asked him to put them away, take away the blocks for a few days. If "Suzy" leaves her bike in the driveway, put the bike away in the garage for a day or two. When it is time to give the items back to them, make sure to have a discussion about why the item was taken in the first place.
My parents did this with me. Once I got the item back, if it was left out again, the consequence would be longer. The third time, then item was given to charity. It didn't take me long to get into the habit of putting my toys away once I saw a few go off to charity!
I have one word for you www.flylady.net This CHANGED my LIFE!!!! sign up for everything! Good luck :)
It is so funny that you feel the same way as most of us mothers. I have a 11year old, a 9year old and a four year old. I have decided to do a chore chart that each job is age appropriate. most f the jobs that my older girls do are chores at the supper time, I have a dry erase board i keep in my kitchen and we change the kids name every two weeks, butthe jobs stay the same. They have set table/clear table, then load dishwasher, wash table off. The next girl will have unload dishwasher, wash table off, take out garbage. My little guy is responsible for keeping his toys picked up after play, his room is a bit more of a challenge, but i take in to consideration his age, if he doesnt clean up his toys from living room, he loses them and they go to a seperate bin, when the bin is full we take to homeless shelter and they give them to needey children. When my children do a good job on chores and with respecting us , we do have reward boxes. I just bough cheap wood boxes at a craft store about 3 to 5 dollars and then we bought stickers and we used markers and whatnot and as a family activity we decorated the boxes, each their own creativity. To keep the (treasure boxes) as we call them, full I go to the local dollar store and fill them up with various things, sometime i do coupon books as well such as one hour of mom alone time, or one hour of whatever activity they may enjoy. well i hope this helps you a bit.... good luck
Target has a great magnet chart that works wonderfully. It's run about $10.00. It comes with many,many magnets to use for the chores. YOu will find it around the wodden puzzle area where the toys are.
Hope that helps
hey sounds like u should get together with me i to have the same problem i hve 3 kids 2 boys ages 13,11 and 1 girl 12 and my daughter is my helper i cant get my boys to do anything when i ask them either i even for warn them about what will happen and they dont care so i went on strike and didnt do any laundry and they started to help i have the same issues with picking up toys and rooms i live in a old church and so i live in the basement and my kids dont care to pick up anything they are hard head and stubborn too i have to threaten to take things away and wehn i do they dont care so we are some what in the same boat , i found out that charts are a waste of time and effort take away things like haveing friends come over or they going over to friends till its done
I imagine with 6 kids you have tons of toys--get rid of most of them, make the mess smaller and easier to manage and maybe you or the kids won't feel overwhelmed. Fewer toys means less cleanup. Or find something that all the kids enjoy (books, reading-my choice as a parent) and get rid of the toys. Even your 6 month old will gain alot more from somebody reading to her than blocks or a stuffed animal. After that is done then the chore chart should come out. Don't expect your kids to do something you're not capable of. That is just my thoughts on it-Good luck!
A. I would go through all of the toys and get rid of the toys that are not age appropriate for the kids.
I have a 3 1/2 old and a 20mo. old. This is what I did I went on line and make a chore chart for them both! My oldest was
Brush teeth (morning)
Make Bed
Get dresses
Put clothes away in Hamper
Pick up toys
Take a bath
Brush teeth (night)
Then every night before bed we would get the chore chart down and put on stickers. Her reward was simple she could have a say with mom and dad or she could save them and go out for dinner. Sometimes she just wanted to oick out what I cooked for dinner. You could reward with watching a movie or a special snack. But my rule was that there could be only one sticker missing from each day or it was not complete. To fill that she could do somehting extra for me like helping to put clothes away.
You can do this for all their ages just give them things that are right for their age. Your oldest can put away clothes for his brothers and things like that
Good luck
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My mom created charts out of tag board that had columns with the the job adjusted for age level(pick up toys, make bed...etc). I always got mowing the lawn, why was that. When we completed them we put up the velcro piece. Each week if all our velcro pieces made it to the end of the week together, then we got to do something special. (like picking a movie at the video store, or sitting in the front seat, ...it doesn't have to spectacular).
She left them sort of general, so that pick up toys meant all toys, pick up clothes meant all clothes--dirty ones in hamper, clean clothes put away. If we didn't, then she started taking things away. She locked the tv in the trunk of the car for a week once. After a while of not having access to things, we started getting the picture. If you have to pick them up, then put them in a box and put it somewhere where they can't get them. If you end up picking up all their clothes and they have nothing to wear and have to run around in their underwear they may start getting the picture that keeping their clothes picked up is worth respect too.
It sounds like they lack a basic respect for what they have. If they argue, just cut them off and tell them your not arguing, this is the way it is, and if you have to do it then this is what is going to happen. No second chances. if they don't have any tubs of toys, they'll be pretty bored. Don't even let them argue. I find that picking up immediately, is better than later. Immediately has better association recall. If they come out of a room, send them right back in to pick up, even if that delays them eating lunch/dinner. My brother went to bed a few times w/o dinner, my sister lost out on getting to go to a slumber or birthday party once that even though it was like 2 weeks away, mom just took it off the calendar. I lost getting rides to school from her for early morning band...I had to walk or ride my bike and I was still expected to get there on time not just by her but the director. Riding my bike with a bass clairnet/tenor sax is not the easiest thing, but yes it can be done all while wearing a backpack of books.
The things they do or have are for them to take care of. our ancestors probably did not have 1/2 of what we do now and they generally lived well or we wouldn't be here.
Sometimes i think if kids can start developing and understanding for what's going on around them it makes them start paying attention more. You could create a calendar that shows everything that your doing. have family mtg night (Sunday) that goes through everything you/kids are doing and impress that if their chores don't get done then activity A will be "erased" from the calendar. My dad did that with us.
The first few times, I remember my dad standing in the middle of the room and we had to report back as we finished he would inspect.
Good luck. it's an uphill battle on a slippery slope, and you may feel like you don't have time, but it's worth it in the end if you can achieve it. And your kids will appreciate it later too.
GROUND THEM ground all of them to their rooms take away all their favorite toys/electronics and leave them there until they learn a little responsibility don't let them run all over you. Its tough love but it works. And get a piece of paper and make a list of things that you want done and then write each of there names next to it and alternate each week. Good luck. I was the middle child of 5 and thats what my parents did. Again good luck!!
