We all know the game, but do you think I should worry that at 7 years old she knows about it and knows girls who have played already???
I wanted to follow-up a little by saying it was, as one lady mentioned, the beloved Arthur books that brought up the subject! This normally innocent and very amusing show/book series was how I found out she already knew about it. I was NOT happy that it was in the book, so it has made its way out of her room now. Question is, do I tell the mom the 'secret' she told me about her friend? She is not, I think, in any situation where she could play this game but I'm wondering how her friend was...! Thanks, everybody.
I agree. 7 is too early. Talk about what is appropriate and not appropriate. It's ONE THING to know about it, another to take part. I would ALSO investigate as to WHO/WHERE she learned about it and have a discussion w/ that child's parents, etc. They may think you're over reacting..........wait until their daughter is 13! Then she'll REALLY be a "knowitall".
I am shocked that girls her age have played this already! I think I first played it in Jr. High. I would definitely have a talk with her about how this is not an appropriate game for kids her age. I would also make sure that you never let her go to a party at which an adult is not present the entire time. I just can't imagine how this game could have been played without a parent knowing. Our kids are growing up too fast! This is one reason I am homeschooling. These bad influences are way too prevalent at school...
It's funny you bring that up. I was watching "Arthur" cartoon with my girls one morning this week and one of the (girl) character's on the show kept wanting to play spin the bottle. I thought that was really inappropriate for such young viewers. It seemed to go right over my girls heads, although after your post I am starting to wonder!
Hi M.,
Wow! I hate that this stuff begins so early! My feeling is that your little girl needs to know what your desire is for her more than judgement about the girls "who participate" in this activity. This might be an opportunity for you to go to the bookstore and find a book which fits your belief system regarding social maturation, boundaries, sexual purity, dating etc. I believe that kids want to know "the why...behind the what." You might not find a book targeted to 7 year-olds but you can take what you read and water-it-down to become age appropriate. Some studies say that girls who know, see, feel that they are precious and special in the eyes of their father, are more secure to delay seeking male peer approval. Life is so full of things to explore and experiment with i.e. hobbies, sports, social and environmental philanthropic activites etc., that I don't know why any parent is allowing spin the bottle to be on the top priority list for a 7-year old. I'm so sorry that you have to confront this now but you are the best role model for your daughter and to show her how much you value her, you set her on a path to value herself.
L.
UGH! It's disgusting now days to hear what the young children know! They are way too young and they know way too much. Thanks to sex education in the schools, older siblings and TV. Just talk to her about it when she brings it up. Let her know it's ok to talk to you about things like this. Don't make it something dirty or naughty. Just be open. In this day and age, we have to talk to our younger kids about things our parents would've NEVER DREAMED discussing with us because it's out there and they know about it!
Good luck!
I would make it clear to her that this is a silly teenage game and that girls her age should not be kissing boys. We all need to shield our kids from growing up too soon.
Good moring, At your daughters age she probably just thinks of it as game. If you make a big deal of it she may become more inqusitive and play the game behind your back. I never had that problem with my three kids but it has been a long time since then and everything is so out in the open now. I would keep an eye out and see how far the game goes. I am an old grandma so my ideas are old fashioned. Good Luck
Since I have a 7 year old granddaughter, I think you should just make sure that your daughter has her childhood with friends who are on the same page.
In other words, her teens will come soon enough, and despite our culture of "too much, too soon",you must let her have her childhood.
So look for other mothers who feel the same and together you can give your girls experiences appropriate for their ages.
I was never afraid to say, "this is the way we do things in our family" to my four daughters.
Unfortunately they are learning things like that earlier and earlier these days. I don't blame you for being concerned. Sadly, short of home schooling her and keeping a very close eye on who she hangs out with, there is no way to stop her from learning this stuff. I guess the best you can do is to sit her down and explain that though some of the girls she knows have played it they are actually too young and you would not want her play it. Then I would be careful about where you let her go for parties. Wish I had some better advice but I guess you have to trust her to make the right decisions when you aren't around.
