Divorce Help - Grand Prairie,TX

Updated on October 01, 2007
C.B. asks from Fort Worth, TX
3 answers

My husband wants a divorce. Last week he told me that if he had it to do over again, he would not have married me, and he is miserable. I was at a loss for words, and I don't want to make anyone miserable. I still love my husband dearly and do not know if he would be open to counseling. I have suggested Christian counseling before. Approximately one month ago, he convinced me to file jointly for Chapter 13 bankruptcy. I strongly objected but agreed because I figured we could work through it together. Although we had no credit card debt, and only $2k left to pay on his vehicle (mine is paid off, but 11 years old), we had gotten behind on our mortgage because he had suffered a heart attack 10 days after our the birth of our son, and we were never able to catch up with a repayment plan. This is all a very difficult situation for me because, I have no family or support system in the DFW area. I am from Louisiana. His parents, sister and cousin live here, but they have never treated me like a member of their family. I relocated to the state of Texas because of my marriage. I do not know what to do. I have a great job, but he pays for the health insurance, etc. I realize that I need legal advice; however, at this present time, I have no money. I am not certain if he is cheating, but something tells me that he is. I have confronted him on multiple occasions, but he always denies it. He receives no phone calls at home. Everyone calls him on his mobile phone. He has started a massive weight loss regimen. He has been sleeping on the couch for the last 2 weeks. He even sits in the garage and talks on his cell phone. I feel so stupid. Our home is literally falling apart, the air conditioning unit needs to be replaced, it has caused structural damage to the tune of leaking approx 2 gallons of water direcly into the master bedroom closet. Friday he dropped the children off at home after school (I typically do not get home from work until approx 6:00 in the afternoon), and left a shop vac and a message with my daughter that it was for the water upstairs. I did not see or hear from him again until 5:30 pm the next day. He came in, changed clothing and left. His sister called my 14-year old on her mobile phone at 10:30 pm Saturday night (totally inappropriately) and asked her if she would mind babysitting her almost 3-year-old son. My daughter had the prescence of mind to say "Let me ask my Mom". I feel 10:30 pm is too late to begin babysitting. Besides my daughter had been working on 3 school projects due within the next 2 weeks all day long. She was tired. I told her that she could babysit if she wanted to, but not to feel obligated. She told her aunt that she would babysit, but that she would need to pick him up by midnight. Needless to say, her aunt called back approximately 5 minutes later to say that she was staying home for the evening. The oven in our kitchen has not worked in over one year. I cannot afford to repair the house, nor can I afford the mortgage payment alone. I cannot afford to move to an apartment because of the bankrupctcy because I cannot afford first and last month's rent instead of the deposit amount typically required, because I am still paying bills at our home (Electric bill has been $500+ for the last 3 monhts) I do not know what to do. I feel isolated and overwhelmed. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

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So What Happened?

Thank you all for the prayers and kind words of direction and advice. I am focusing on my children (who are the most important and innocent parties in this situation), and have decided to reach out to my parents for support. Thanks again for all of your kindness and continued prayers.

More Answers

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R.S.

answers from Dallas on

C.,

So sorry to hear about your situation. I know the Tarrant Bar Association, and possibly the Arlington Bar Association, have a legal aid line for those who can't afford an attorney. Here's the info from the Tarrant Bar: LegalLine a bi-monthly free service -- ###-###-####

The Tarrant County Bar Association offers opportunities for free legal advice to the public. LegalLine, a FREE call-in service, is available from 6 p.m. to 8 p.m. on the second and fourth Thursday of each month. Callers may receive free legal advice by calling ###-###-####. LegalLine is a completely free, no-strings-attached public service.

Good luck!

2 moms found this helpful
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T.K.

answers from Dallas on

Wow, sounds like your thoughts are all over the place, as could be expected...

First and foremost, I think you need to seriously sit down with your husband and decide if counseling is the way to go or if divorce is truly the answer. For him to just be in and out of the house and talking on his phone in the garage is completely disrespectful to you and your family. And you have to tell him so. Counseling might be a good idea; the therapist can give you his professional opinion as to what you guys should do. But you both have to be up for it, in order for it to work.

Then you go from there--if counseling is what you decide, then commit fully. Put everything you have into it. If the answer is divorce, then you guys have to make a plan. You shouldn't be left to worry and stress over the house and bills while he gets to leave and do what he wants now. You two are still married and need to get yourself in order before leading a separate lives.

But most importantly, you need to pray hard on this. Get family members and friends to pray with you on this. The Devil sees a little crack in a relationship and can turn it into a canyon...but God can make a bridge over that canyon.

Whatever you do, know that i've sent a prayer up for you and your family. Good luck.

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

L.H.

answers from Dallas on

I feel your pain. Just Let go and Let God.

1 mom found this helpful
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