My son had chronic ear infections from the age of two months to two years. (Believe it or not...we have 28 ear infections documented in his medical records) He even perferated his left ear drum around 1 1/2 years old. At the age of two he had tubes put in and we saw immediate improvements. His poor ears were so full of fluid he couldn't sleep, he was losing weight, he cried for, I swear, two years straight! The day he had his tubes put in he started eating like there was no tomorrow and by the next night started sleeping through the night for the first time ever. Of course, then my husband and I were in a panic because we were so used to waking up every 30 minutes to crying that we couldn't sleep anyway for quite some time. His poor ears were so full of fluid that he heard very little. He only knew a couple of words at the age of two but within just a week or so after having the tubes put in his vocabulary grew substantially. We are still dealing with speech issues and have his hearing tested yearly. He does have some permanent damage in his left ear but it's not significant, that is according to the doctor.
I understand your concern about the tubes because we went through the same thing but it was the best thing we could have done for our son at that time. I just wish we could have done it sooner but his poor little ears were so infected it could have made things worse. He has had only one ear infection since the tubes were put in and that was when he was around 2.5 years old. He is now 4.5 and both tubes have come out in the past year and we are still free from an ear problems. Let's pray this continues.
I don't know if any of this helps but if your daughter is losing sleep, irritable, not eating, or behind in her speech, I would seriously consider doing it. Apparently the only reason they sedate young children is to relax them. If it was an adult having tubes put in, it can be done right in a doctor's office because there is really no pain involved. It's a very quick procedure... I know you will worry and probably be in tears because I was too while it was being done to my son but I knew if I didn't agree that there was a great chance he would end up losing his hearing.