Filing Ch 7 ; Sad, Scared, Embarrassed. Please Tell Me Your Bounceback Story

Speak to the hospital to see if they can reduce the fees and/or offer payment plans.

Also, if you can listen to Dave Ramsey and try and call him for advice. You can also check out his website. He is a financial advisor.

Wish you the best of luck.

I'm with Fuzzy on this one. People need to go jump in a lake. It's your family and your call. You need to make the best choice for your family.

My husband filed after his divorce left him with a six figure debt. Together we got him through the filing and then slowly built him back up. He had my help but within five years his credit score has recovered completely. Part of our strategy was putting him on loans as co-borrower because we knew the payments would be made every time one time. Also I helped him get a credit card with a box store. It had a low limit with a high interest rate but we paid it off every month and used it sparingly as a means of rebuilding his credit. He is still barred from certain loans in his own name because of the bankruptcy but with a solid credit score many doors are open to him. We had to get a little creative to rebuild his credit but with my help we got him there. I say all of this to encourage you. Sometimes we have to do the best with the hand we have been dealt which doesn't mean it's a very pretty road. Do the best you can and don't add any unnecessary guilt, stress or shame. Good luck.

Make sure that you don't blow your chances to get your surgery by filing too soon! If the hospital finds out that you might not be able to pay, they won't do the surgery. Hopefully your insurance covers the bulk of the surgery, but still...

I'm so sorry you've had this awful thing happen to you. I don't have any other advice, but I just wanted to tell you that...

Ten years isn't really as long as you think it is.

Lots of people go broke! You'd be surprised how many multi-millionaires have gone broke a time or two in their lives. I know people who have gone through bankruptcy court (I haven't had that experience, but you never know) and not only lived to tell about it but also are doing well now. Sometimes they say that, even though it was something they *never* wanted to do, it was the best decision considering the circumstances.

If you ever read Louisa May Alcott's AN OLD-FASHIONED GIRL, you'll remember that, close to the end of the book, the father of the rich family has to declare bankruptcy, and the daughter asserts that his was an honorable bankruptcy - the result of bad economic events - rather than the result of a crime, negligence, or some other less honorable behavior. I do think your illness puts you in the honorable category.

It could be that people won't look down on you as much as you think they might. Chapter 7 is not that uncommon. If it were me, I'd just tell the truth if anyone actually asked about it. I'd say my health went way downhill and the money went the same way. They may make other comments, but you don't have to listen to them.

Don't focus on what others may or may not think of you; focus on your goal of getting back in good financial (and physical) shape. You don't drown by falling into water - only by staying there. Start swimming. Keep your encouraging, positive friends and family members around you as much as possible. Consider that this might turn out to be a great learning experience for your child if you can face it with a good attitude. I'm in your cheering section.

I filed BK in 2010. I don't really have a bounce back story. I haven't been using credit and the house is in my husbands name. Just wanted to say, don't worry about what other people think, do what's best for your family. Sometimes you just need a fresh start, nothing to be ashamed or embarrassed about.
As far as the disability, have you applied for long term disability? When you say "chronic" it sounds like your illness is long lasting so you should be able to qualify. And don't hesitate to try to get help from your human services dept., that's what it's there for. Wishing you the best.

Medical reasons are the top reason for bankruptcy in America.

No advice, I just wanted to say you shouldn't even find yourself in this situation. If we removed the middle man and his billion dollar profit, you wouldn't be here. I'm sorry we have such a messed up medical system.

It's not anyone's business except yours and those who you share with. Don't tell anyone. Just go about your business the best you can and move forward.

Do you KNOW how many companies file bankruptcy every few years? Tons of them. They do it so they can get out of paying off stuff. Then they turn around and form another business and do the same thing again. It's horrible! They are the reason so many laws regarding bankruptcy.

We had all the stuff gathered up to file but it just cost too much. Then the laws changed and we have a whole slew of new medical bills.

Things I would ask you to think about...

Talk to the hospitals billing office, ask about subsidy help to pay the bill. They often have money for this purpose. If they don't let them know you are financially unable to pay any part of these bills and are going forward with bankruptcy. Letting them know there is no money coming from you will help them to understand you're not someone who just doesn't want to pay the bill, you ARE someone who absolutely has no money to pay that bill.

They might change their mind and try to find some funds to allocate towards your bill at that point.

Try contacting the credit bureau in your area. Find out if they have a free bill consolidating service. We took classes and signed up for them to take a portion of our money to pay certain bills. They took almost all of our bring home income. It was more than we could afford. We had to cover housing costs/utilities, car insurance, gasoline, food, etc...out of the small amount they left us each month. Our credit card companies could agree or not agree to sign up for this program. If they did agree they took what payment was sent to them, no more phone calls, no legal actions, their hands were tied legally as long as any payment from the money was made. If they didn't agree they got nothing until the others that had agreed were paid off.

If they don't offer any programs like that where your creditors would agree to sign up through this then you really don't have any other options than to file in court.

If your family is suffering due to her private school cost then apply for a scholarship with them, let them know you are sick and it's chronic. If they say "We don't do scholarships" then they aren't a school you want to be associated with. They don't see the value in poor people or people who are going through a rough time. Hopefully it's not the school you teach at.

Of the 4 private schools in my area, one is catholic, one is associated with a nationally recognized church, one associated with a local congregation, and 1 privately owned the only one of these that does NOT offer scholarships is the one that is a local congregation. They are a large school but don't have the highest reputation for education. They are the highest priced too but they don't pay their teachers near half of what the other teachers in private schools are making. They aren't where I'd send my kid for sure. They have a high turn over of kids too.

BUT if the private school does not have a scholarship program you really need to consider the amount of money you're spending sending her there.

I'm assuming Chickpea is around 8 since you had a question about first communion a while back. She's firmly entrenched in her school. I know there aren't many more years of her going there if it's like the schools in my area, they go through 6th grade or 7th grade but then the kids go to regular high school.

I feel bad for you being so sick, I hope someone can find a good solution for your illness and it will help you be healthier. There is nothing worse than having long term illness.

Persimmon, you have absolutely no reason to feel ashamed. Life happens, that's a shitload of long term health issues, which are still not over.

Some perfect advice already...but wanted to tell you that many years ago my father helped his other step children file bankruptcy, even paid for their attorney's. And their reasons were ALL their OWN fault...just chronic overspending....they bought a huge home, paid for private schools, RV, boat, fancy vacation...and the thing is they didn't learn to reign it all in. They just recreated their life style again. In another state.

That behavior is shameful. Yours is not. Stop beating yourself up over.

It really bothers me to read medical stories like yours though. You work, you pay for insurance, and the insurance companies have so many rules to protect their assets, and no concern for what you have invested in. I'm a huge believer in socialized medicine for reasons like this. NO ONE should have to lose their homes and savings over unforeseen medical problems. You're health is stressed out as it is, and then you lose all that you've saved. The insurance companies should be ashamed, not you!

Without going into details, I have a dear friend whose business was hit hard by the recession. She's gone banko (that's what she calls it) more than once, and you know, I have no less respect or love for her than I did before. She, like you, keeps on doing the best she can. Life is not perfect and sometimes, this is a truly necessary measure.

I don't have a story. I just have some unsolicited advise. I just want to second the Dave Ramsey suggestion. He has great ideas on how to best handle these types of struggles and how to prevent them from reoccurring.
I wish you all the best as you go through this!

You couldn't help this-you were ill and needed surgery-this is what bankruptcy is for. It is there to help people like you-there is no shame in this-feel better, take care and stop worrying.

Not only did I have to file bankruptcy, but my house was foreclosed on around the same time. If the house had sold, I could have avoided bankruptcy but there were no buyers until I was there and once allowed to sell, the buyers had all disappeared.
Anyway. Four years later we were able to buy a nice house at a reasonable interest rate that I still love. We were able to refinance to an even lower rate 2 years ago. I have 3 store credit cards - all with 0 balances - and an unsecured credit card through my CU for emergencies - I am working to pay off its balance in the next 7 months. I have a medical credit account at 0% interest that will be completely paid off within the next year too.
The 10 years on your credit report is true, but with the explanation of medical emergencies a lot of companies are understanding.
The way you bounce back is never making another late payment on anything. Realize that your next credit card will be probably be secured - money that you give the company up front for any charges you may make. Also, you do not have to tell anyone about the bankruptcy. You won't be wearing a scarlet B on your forehead and your finances are no one else's business.
It may make getting a new job a bit more difficult as some employers now access credit reports, but the longer ago it happened, the less it affects that decision.
Be aware that some creditors may actually sell your account after they get notice of your filing and those new creditors may try to collect it. This is illegal and once you tell them the account was made a part of your bankruptcy they must take it off the books and are no longer allowed to harass your for payment. If they do, you can report them to your State Corporation Commission and the bankruptcy court for the violation of the federal laws that are there to protect you.
Once it is completely over, you will be amazed at how well you will sleep.