Fussy Evenings

Hi H.,
I feel for you! My son had his fussy time like clock work, as well. I called my Doula and even though it wasn't a "cure", it just made life easier when she told me that "babies just cry and need to cry".

First off, it took the pressure off of me thinking I was not meeting a need. Second, I got into the habit of just holding my son for a bit in the glider chair and saying (in a loud voice), "it's okay, sometimes babies just need to cry" or "it's good for a baby to cry" or other things along those lines. I did this while he had his head up near my shoulder and I would pat his back or bottom. And, it really helped calm him down. I don't know if it was the fact that I was more calm or my voice or just the rocking back and forth or the combination thereof, but it made life a little easier- less stressful.
Just my 2 cents. Hang in there.
R. B.
www.MakeYourOwnStuffedAnimal.com

My son has the same fussy period.. and I think all of the comments you have gotten so far are good ones:) My son LOVES to go for a walk.. he fusses the whole time I am getting him in and situated.. but once I am out the door he is totally calm.. if it is rainy or cold though.. I sometimes try to calm him down and if it one of those days where nothing can soothe him.. I just put him down on a soft blanket where he can see me.. and I let him cry it out. I promise he will be fine.. and this kid is way more than loved.. and they know it too. It took me a while to realize I was doing the right thing.. honestly now.. he has gotten to where he doesnt want you to hold him during these times.. and when he is ready for bed.. you better lay him down and walk away.. occasionally he will let me rock him to sleep.. but I honestly think that letting him cry has also taught him to be a little more self soothing.. I just wish I would have figured this out when my daughter was a baby.. she ended up slepping with us until she was 2 cause I held her all the time to keep her from crying.. and couldt bear to let her cry herself to sleep.. Good luck.. Its just a phase.. you will miss it some day!

Invest in a good sling! They keep me sane!

Something like a mei tai so you can wear her on your back while your cooking! The constant motion should soothe her!

Oh, the 5:00 fuss. Those were so tough for my little one. There were times that nothing could soothe him. A lot of times he just wanted to be near me. I put him in his baby bjorn and got dinner ready with him in there. MANY times he took his 3rd nap in there. I had to cook sideways (so he wouldn't get hurt) or put a blanket over him. Granted, I moved slower so I wouldn't wake him up - but I was able to at least get stuff done - and he was somewhat happier in there.

Mine also loved to be outside, so maybe a walk after she woke up would make her happy - or put her to sleep. A few times I would take him for a walk and he would fall asleep in his stroller. I left him in there while I got stuff done around the house.

I remember those days and they are hard. I hope you find something that works for your daughter. Do you have a jumper to put in the doorway? Maybe a little gym that she can sit in and bounce in or play with? This might sound bad - but when my son was able to watch Baby Einstein, he watched that while I cooked dinner. He loved it. As he got a little older I used Sesame Street alphabet DVD - he learned his ABC's really young. I'm sure that helped! :-)

Good luck!
S.

What about a swing? If I'm trying to get dinner fixed, I put my baby in his swing, and he's content for a while. This is the only time of day that I use it, and I only leave him in it while I'm doing the big stuff or working with things that don't need his assistance like stoves or such. I put my swing in the kitchen that way he's near me and can watch what I'm doing and not get upset b'c he's not with me or nearby.

My 9 mths old baby gets up about the same time varying between 3:30 to 4:30 from his 2nd nap, and I feed him, bathe him and get him ready for bed then put him in his swing until daddy gets home to play with him about 6pm. We stretch it till 7pm to put him down for the night but sometimes we only make it to 630pm. I think the pack-n-play will be a great idea once baby is sitting up on her own with a few toys. Again put nearby in kitchen so she can see what you're doing.

We took out our baby's 3rd nap when he started waking up at night again. There should be a chart online maybe at www.babycenter.com that will tell you about how much sleep your baby needs in a 24 hr period. Then we just adjusted his wake/nap time accordingly so he would sleep thru night again. Hang in there!

How about a pack and play? Maybe you could put it in your kitchen or near you while you are fixing dinner? You could put some toys and things in there for her while you get everything ready. I've done that before for short periods of time. I used a bouncy seat also, I'm not sure if she is ready for that yet though, maybe you could do that later. It has a seat in there and toys, so that might work.

Have you tried some soothing music? That always helped my child and still does. They have a lot of great CD's out there for little ones, so maybe you could try that. I also have a sound machine that works great for my Son. It has the waves, rain, outside-cricket sounds and the white noise. It has helped a lot with naps, bedtimes and other times he is fussy. Even other music like Baby Einstein or you could sing songs to your baby, maybe that might help soothe her. The library has a great selection of CD for kids/infants and videos too.

You might try giving her a little snack after her nap. I don't remember our Son having any major problems with this and at that time either. Maybe she needs more holding, so maybe a sling or the Baby Bjorn type carrier might work also.

If problems continue and get worse, you could always call your pediatrician, maybe there is something else going on that needs attention. ECI (Early Childhood Intervention) is great also if there are significant concerns with development/behavior that kind of thing.

Have you tried Tummy Time? I did that with our Son and put toys down on the floor and got down on the floor with him and he never liked his Tummy much, but they really need to get Tummy Time. He would roll over a lot to his back.

Does your daughter have any type of cuddly toy or special toy that she enjoys? If she does, give her that during her fussy times and while you are fixing dinner.

Hope this helps and it will get better!