Sorry to hear of your experience.
Nausea and pain is pretty common after tube surgery - we knew what to expect so weren't as concerned - we brought a garbage can for the drive home (vomit). My kids all experienced this. If you weren't aware before then I could see how that would be distressing.
Our tubes became dislodged with wax buildup. We use olive oil to soften the wax. They won't work if they are embedded in wax.
My children had chronic ear infections since infancy. They don't have sensory processing disorder - we were told by our ENT team that kids who grow up with pain become used to it unfortunately - I didn't always know they had infections. As they got older and with the tubes - it got easier.
We have also had tubes fall out (one time we had to replace them).
Hopefully they will be able to adjust it or replace.
Good luck :)