Having Issues with Neighbors

M.,
This happened to me about 6 months ago and yes with the neighbor. The neighbors and their children ignore us. i was real upset first but then I realized I did NOTHING wrong. I do feel like an outcast but i really don't care, they can kiss my ***. You have to think what did the parents tell their children to make them ignore your kids. They must of told their kids not to play with your kids and i'm sorry that is not good parenting. I would never tell my son not to play with a certin kid because i didn't get along with their parents. I know its hard making friends but get active in church or maybe put a blog on here for a playdate at mcdonalds one day or something like that. The moms on here are great. And its a great support group. I wouldn't know what to tell my son. Thank god he's only 2 and doesn't understand. But maybe keep them busy doing other things and start playing in the backyard. I forgot I had one until all this happened.
Keep your head high and think to yourself I'm a great person. Its their loss not yours. Hope this helps.
J.

I do not think anyone could give better advice than the lady Jen B below! Awesome!

This is a sticky situation...I agree...but in the end your marriage and everything involved with that is between you and your husband and others should respect your union. Every marriage will have problems including your neighbors and I can only pray that God will remind them of the sanctity of marriage so their actions will change. I am a very direct and honest person so me personally, I would directly talk to the neighbors about what is going on. I wouldn't get into the "he said, she said," nor the whys/reasons because that is your personal life but I would address the way they are treating you all in hopes that it would clear the air and everyone have the understanding that it's your marriage not theirs so they do not need to gossip. Pray about it and let God lead you. He will open and shut doors according to His Will for you and let Him take care of the situation. Most importantly, you and your husband stay united! Best of luck.

What misery. Yes, the price is hard to pay for mistakes we make. I know this must be hard for you and your kids as you feel like prisoners of your own home.

This has created great turmoil amongst everyone. Your husband needs to apologize to the other husband. Then keep a low profile. Perhaps he can do the cleaning and cooking while you are outside watching the kids....no joke.

Is there any "one" friend on the block you can talk to that can help you clear this up with the neighbors so there can be some open doors? Even though this is something you did not do, but an apology from you can't hurt. Let them know you are not the bad guy and certainly not your kids.

With time and their acceptance, things will blow over.

Blessings!

Do both... MOVE and get rid of the Husband. Leave him there to deal with the rude neighbors.

Wow, that is tough. I hate to say it, but if people are talking behind your back and giggling about something as painful as adultery, then they were never really friends. Do you guys have a church home? If not, now might be a good time to look for one where you feel accepted and loved and have the room to work through the stuff going on in your lives. I know you already know this, but this might be a little work for you guys to be right again. If you ever want to visit my church and you are in the Houston area we are called Our Fellowship Christian Church at 6925 Cook Rd, Alief Tx. The phone number is ###-###-#### to speak with the pastor, Howard. We meet Sundays at 4pm. We are really friendly and non-judgmental. I know that moving is what almost anyone would want but it just isn't always that simple. I will pray for you guys and wish you all the best. Now is a great time to comfort your kids as their feelings may be hurt and use it as a lesson about the kind of friend to be to someone. Most of all, forgive your neighbors and tell your kids to do the same, bitterness never made anyone's lives happier. You hold your head high and pray for your kids, God will see you through because He loves you! Hang in there and come see us anytime :)

Sorry to hear this. This is just my opinion. If I were you, I will sell the house and move out from the there. Start fresh and build better relationship and trust with your husband.

Hi M.,
Have you noticed if the neighbors are treating the other lady and her family the same are they are treating your family? I ask because if they aren’t, it’s highly likely that she’s spun some story with the rest of them about being the victim. You and your children are the victims and I can’t believe anyone would act with such little compassion towards you and your children. This is ridiculously beyond being childish; it’s down right hateful. Unfortunately, I’m sure the other parents have said some pretty inappropriate things in front of their children so a lot of it will probably get back to your 10 year old daughter, so you might want to count it as a blessing that the kids aren’t really playing together right now. I say move on (emotionally) from these valueless neighbors because they were never really your friends if they can mock you and your children for being the victims of adultery. It’s going to be hard, but you need to focus on what’s best for you and your family and ignore the stupidity of the world. If you’ve decided that you can forgive your husband for this then it’s no one else business. Your 10 year understands what’s going on, so look into getting the 10 year old into an after school program or something else to keep her evening busy. Give her options and let her pick. If you aren’t already, please consider counseling for her so she doesn’t suffer self-esteem issues from this because she’s at the age where she’s developing her expectation on how to let men treat her by the way her father treats her mother. Even if you guys haven’t told her details, you can bet that some of the neighborhood kids will make unkind comments to her about this. The 2 year old is too young to understand so join a play group or get some new toys for the backyard and I’m sure he will be just as happy playing as before. I’m truly sorry for you, I know this is not the ideal situation, but it’s the situation that your husband has put your family in and unfortunately it’s really going to fall on you to make it work for your family’s sake. If you don’t have a church family that you can lean on, now is the prefect time to reach out and make one. You’re whole family will enjoy the fellowship it offers and your husband can hopefully have the good influence of faithful men around him to help keep him devoted to you and your children. I wish you and your family the best.