Help for a Fussy Baby

Updated on February 04, 2008
K.V. asks from Bend, OR
50 answers

Hi all, I have a 2 month daughter who has started something new. I can rock her or bounce her to sleep and get her in a deep sleep. As soon as I put her down she will wake up within minutes and scream. Any ideas how I can put her down and make her stay sleeping??

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N.T.

answers from Seattle on

One thing that worked really well for my daughter was that I would put her down, and then keep both of my hands hands on her chest and belly for a couple of breaths and then remove one hand, wait a couple of breaths and then remove the other. It wasn't an exact science, just a sense and a little patience. Good luck!

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S.P.

answers from Seattle on

Hi K., My baby boy is 15 wks old. He'll wake up a little when I put him down, so I put a firm but gentle hand over his body (and sometimes on the side of his face - the Ped. said that's calming) until he settles back down into a nice sleep. We also use a sound machine and that seems to help a lot. We've only had him in his crib for about a month now. He was sleeping all night in his swing. That was great too! Anyway, I hope that makes sense, and is worth something to you.
S.

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M.K.

answers from Portland on

Is she swaddled when you are putting her to sleep? Mine can't sleep unless she is swaddled. We use the SwaddleMe variety. This was the best piece of advice that I got out of the Happiest Baby on the Block method.

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S.C.

answers from Portland on

WOW lots of advice!! I believe that you know best what your baby needs. I bet you are doing a great job.

I found that I was placing my baby down on cold sheets. He hated that...I bought some sheets at Babies R Us that are really nice and soft. It isn't flannel, but I am not sure the material. They always feel warm. He started sleeping better right away. I also have my husband put our son to bed. I feed him at 7:00. Then my husband does bath, story, song prayer and puts him to bed. He goes down so much better for daddy.

Hope this helps.

S.

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D.C.

answers from Portland on

I hope that I can be of some help. I'd first make sure to rule out anything medical. Keep a close eye on on what she does and when she does it, her reactions to your actions, and then let your pediatrician know what's happening so that anything medical can be ruled out.

When my son was an infant, I was fortunate enough to read an article that helped me find a happy medium between leaving my baby to cry himself to sleep and picking him up each time he cried.

For the first week, I'd rock my son to sleep and then place him on his back in his crib. (I do not think you need to miss out on rocking her to sleep and it doesn't hurt the baby.) If he woke to cry, I was there immediately, did not pick him up, made sure he was safe and didn't need a diaper change, and would quietly tell him I loved him, he was safe, and it was time to sleep. I would softly touch him, maybe rub his tummy a little, and then step back. I would assure him with my soft words that he was loved, safe, and it was time to sleep. Slowly, I'd make my way out of the room.

The next week, I added five minutes before responding. I'd repeat the process. If he wasn't asleep by the time I left the room, I waited five minutes before starting over. However, I didn't pick him up unless he needed physical attention such as a diaper change. I would gently touch him and talk to him and slowly make my way out of the room.

The next week, I'd add another five minutes before responding. I'd repeat the process and add minutes when needed; however, I think I rarely had to let my son cry for ten minutes because this process worked so well for us.

Note, that if your baby becomes sick or some event changes the schedule, you'll need to start this process over again. And, I have to encourage a scheduled bed time and a familiar routine before bed. The routine helps the baby feel more comfortable. Babies need a lot of sleep and they like schedules. Mommies and daddies need sleep as well and some grown up time.

Also, young babies like to feel safe. If you're not still wrapping her snuggly in her blanket, you might try it. Also, there are those baby chucks you can place on either side of her to let her feel safe and snug in her crib. I used them with my son.

I do agree with making sure the house has it's normal sounds at sleep time for the baby. You don't want to always tip-toe around the house.

I hope that this works for you. It sure worked great for my son and me. I was 30 when my son was born and I've always been a single mother.

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J.G.

answers from Bellingham on

I had this problem with my now 4 y.o. son. I was NEVER able to lay him down. And no one else could hold him. It also took me on average, 1 hour of fussy nursing to get him to sleep. It started from the moment he was born and stayed with us until he was about 18 months. It used to help my son sleep better when he was propped up because it felt more like I was still holding him. The other things that helped us were patience, a polithera of slings and baby carriers, and a book called THE NO CRY SLEEP SOLUTION. At only 2 months old, she is probably still adjusting to this outside world and wants to be snuggled close with movement. When that snuggling stops, it wakes her up. Lots of babies are like this.
She is young enough that it may be a phase and she may grow out of it. Just try to take it one day at a time and not get to stressed out about it. Good luck!

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K.S.

answers from Seattle on

Just wanted to second the recommendation for the "Happiest Baby on the Block" by Dr. Karp - if you are really in a hurry get the DVD instead of the book. Frankly, I had both - watched the DVD to get a quick demo (and it helps to "see" the techniques WORKING) and then used the book for reference. By the way, I was given both as shower gifts from other Mom's who said they could not have made it through the newborn stage without them....

K.

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J.B.

answers from Bellingham on

I think it is a parents hardest challenge to help their child fall asleep by themselves and to stay asleep. I don't think there is an easy answer to this issue. People are so varied on how they approach this because every baby really has their own little set of rules. I wore my daughter a lot in the front pack just so I didn't have to hold her while she slept. She would nurse and sleep in that thing. All of the books that I trust on the subject suggest that you should lay them down as often as possible before they fall asleep but if they fall asleep nursing obviously that makes it difficult. My son (currently 8 months) was too heavy to carry in the front pack for long. I rediscovered the swaddling thing when he was about 3 months. I would swaddle him (he fussed about this a little), then lay down next to him and nurse him. I tried to remove my breast from him before he fell asleep whenever I could so that he could practice falling asleep with out a mommy crutch. For a long time I could just slip away and leave him on the bed because he really couldn't get out of the swaddle or turn over. He would take really good naps this way. Then when he started to pull his Houdini act and wiggle out of his swaddle I had to make sure that I put him in the crib before I left the room. Then it was a matter of making sure he was good and asleep before I picked him up off of the bed and gently lay him in the crib. Finally we had to ween him off of the swaddle because we felt that having the blankets in there with him was not safe if he could wiggle out of them. He was doing fantastic for a while and taking two two hour naps a day. Recently he started teething and got into separation anxiety issues and I feel like we are starting over at square one. I have always been able to put up with some fussing or crabbing as he worked his way to sleep but the other day I was watching someone elses baby and he wouldn't go to sleep. I tried to bite the bullet and let him cry himself to sleep. I and just kept telling myself to wait 5 more minutes. He cried hard for 45 min. before I couldn't stand it anymore. I will never do that again. It was awful and he definitely seemed to be much more clingy the following day.
I really recommend the book "No cry sleep method" if you are like me and can't cope with your baby crying frantically for you to pick her up. I think that for babies younger than 6 months they just recommend laying your baby down as much as possible and letting her find her own ways of self soothing. They say not to let them cry it out this young. If you think you can tough it out they say that after 6 months that it is not supposed to harm your baby to cry for that long. Good luck!

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R.W.

answers from Anchorage on

Hello, K.,
I have three children that are now in their teens, but when they were young babies, I was told that dissolving a peppermint candy in like an ounce of warm water helps to sooth their stomaches and aide them in sleeping better. I tried it and it worked. My husband at the time would have to walked my daughter up and down the stairs or hallways before I tried it. Then, he was able to get some sleep afterwards....lol! I hope this helps. Take care and God Bless you and yours,
R. W.

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J.A.

answers from Portland on

As I've found with my 4 children, each one is different in their sleep patterns, however, you are in control of teaching them 'routine'. The very best thing for your baby is to learn to fall asleep on her own in her own bed, this way, when she wakes in the middle of the night, she'll be able to fall back asleep on her own. The result of that is you getting a full nights rest...eventually. Read "Baby Wise" , it's got some really great advice for teaching a routine to your baby who craves consistancy. You may not follow everything, but apply some of it and your little girl will sleep wonderfully. Good LUCK! Jen A
P.S.
2 of my 4 were tummy sleepers after 8 weeks, they were the ones with the worst gas/colic too, The pressure on the tummy is soothing to them. I waited until 8 weeks so they could turn their head from side to side easily.

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A.B.

answers from Portland on

My daughter was the same way. I found if I put her in a swing, bouncy chair or the car seat where she could still be moving she would stay a sleep. She is now four months and still take a nap in her swing or bouncy chair but sleeps in her crib just fine at night. Good luck. I remember how exhausting that was.

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A.B.

answers from Portland on

Hi kristen,

My daughter is almost four months and she did/does the same thing. Not as much now but it's to the point where only I can put her down to sleep. My husband says I am more gentle but I think he just likes the fact that I can instantly calm her where as he has to try for a while and he doesn't have to do it. :) I will bounce and rock her whatever it takes and the seems as though she is out for the count and as you said wakes up the second i put her down.

What I do now is instead of holding her up on my shoulder I hold her in the position she will be in laying down(horizontal). Then I bounce/rock her. When I am convinced she is asleep I walk over to her play pen(where she still sleeps in our room) continuing to rock her. As I lay her down I keep her close to my body even when she is in the crib. I just lean over( chest to chest)then I put my hand on her chest/belly and stay there until her little hands slowly relax.I think even though I lay her down she can still feel my presence and hear me breathing untill she falls into a deep sleep in her bed. That seems to be working for me.I tried to explain this to my husband but he still lays her down on our bed and then when we go to bed moves her to hers and wonders why she's awake. Hope this works. Just wait untill she starts teething and it messes up her sleep pattern again...ugh! LOL

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R.L.

answers from Reno on

I had the same problem with my son, who is now 2 1/2 and is a GREAT sleeper...now. I tried taking off the shirt I was wearing and putting it either near him or over him so he could still "smell" me while he slept. Worked more often than not.

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B.M.

answers from Seattle on

K.-

Hi. The thing that worked best for me I read in a parenting magazine. What you do is to pick up and rock or just hold baby for five minutes and then put baby down for five. Then pick baby up again for five and down for seven, then up for five and down for ten, then up for five and down for 15... This is a "settling" technique that helps soothe baby's nervous system, and helps them learn to fall asleep on their own. I know it looks like a lot of work, and you'll have to repeat it for a few nights, but it works. And this time will pass for your baby. Before you know it she'll be independent and you'll miss the days when she needed you.

Best of luck to you!
-B.-

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K.S.

answers from Portland on

My little one started doing the same thing at about the same time. I gave the swing a try and she started taking two hour naps in it!

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A.S.

answers from Seattle on

Have her ears checked thoroughly, it seems if there is a problem in the ear, lying down can be more painful. This is exactly what my son was doing at 2 mos.

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L.Z.

answers from Anchorage on

We have just done this with our 3 month. I am now no longer bouncing carrying, rocking etc. as of this week. My DH walked her miles in a carrier and it is just not possible for me to do so. So I laid down with her and she cried, terribly so, but she is now no longer *demanding* to be moving. She has now learned that it is possible to go to sleep without moving. She also has a flailing limb syndrome and we have to stand guard until she is really far, far down because she will wriggle out of burrito wrapping. We practically have to nail her hands and feet to the bed. One hand goes and bops her on the head and then the other and before you know it all hands and feet are going at full speed. Yesterday this happened even after I thought she was down for her nap 5X. Finally nap time was over. :-( UGH... Anyway, my advice would be the following:

1. Check for gas...burp her again before trying to get her to sleep. Make sure that if you are BFing that you are not getting excess air in her. Ours passed through a stage where she was not as fussy about air in her tummy and we were not aggressive about getting air out and then it went into intestines...Yikes! Talk about screams! I now feed her lying down because I have learned that I have a fast letdown.

2. Check her diaper one last time.

3. Get her to go down without carrying or rocking her. However, don't leave her to cry it out. Stay with her and reassure her with nice even shooshes and tell her that it is time to go to sleep and that this is the way you go to sleep...that you are going to teach her something new. The first couple of times it may take a long time...for us it was an hour. I did not really believe in letting her cry as we are doing attachment parenting, but it got to be so bad that she would not even be happy in my arms and was insisting with body language she wanted to be walked like DH had been doing and I physically can not do so like he can. HOWEVER, you must now always put her down this way. We tried to do this, but then would often cave not wanting to let her cry and basically we were not teaching her how to go to sleep. I have been doing this now 3 days and it is really working. No more walking etc., but consistency is important. I have been the one to put her down each time. I think that if this does not sound right to you right now, you have to reach a certain point of exasperation. It takese a tremendous amount of patience and you need to be prepared for that. Don't get frustrated or irritated or upset. I felt like it was our fault for having taught her the way we had, so I had to be the strong one and patient one and exude confidence even though you and I know that we are FTM trying to do this the best we can.

HTH

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Y.G.

answers from Portland on

My 4 month old has been the same way. I've decided she not truely in deep sleep, just content to be on you. Kinda like a cat nap. I've notice an night, when she is ready, she is out like a light. Babies that age still like to be swaddled. I found the "swaddle me" brand wraps work great. Rock her to sleep in it, then lay her down. Then you don't get the startle reflex when her arms and legs move. Also, they like the movement. Try a swing on low if you haven't already. I'm starting to believe this is the norm, the more moms I talk to. I can't seem to lay this one down for 5 minutes and she's screaming to be picked up. My first was content as ever by herself on the floor, swing, or bouncy chair. Good luck!

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T.S.

answers from Bellingham on

I had the same problem with my son. I spent lots of nap times with him on my chest...which now that he's seven seems heavenly...but at the time I would occasionally like to get some things done during nap time. I used the rosado sling and would put him to sleep in that, then I would slowly lay him down and scootch out of the sling. He would stay wrapped up in it and it seemed to help him not notice the transition as much. We did a family bed, so I didn't have to worry about lifting him into a crib, laying down for a few minutes in bed with him and then getting up also helped, or nursing him side lying, laying in bed until he fell asleep and then slowly getting up. In a few more months it will become a lot easier. At 2 months she is still working on getting a consistent sleep time and really needs to be close to you most of the time anyway.

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K.K.

answers from Spokane on

My daughter who is a premie did the same thing. I found that swaddling her really helped. Also putting a hand on her when I laid her down helped her feel secure until she fell back to sleep.
Another thing that worked wonders what putting a small fan in her room. It was just enough "white noise" to help her stay asleep. It probably helped block out other house noise while she slept.
Hopes this helps. I spent many nights with her sleeping on my chest before I figured these things out! :-)

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C.S.

answers from Portland on

Hi K.,

My daughter did this too. No matter how asleep we had her, every time we'd lay her down she would wake up. Sounds like what you are describing. We bought a book called, Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Baby. While we found it some what frustrating at times, it did help. We ended up just laying her down and letting her cry herself to sleep. It took a long time and was probably harder on us than on her, but one night and she was going to sleep on her own in her crib. Now we go through a night time routine, bath at 6:30, baby oil, pj's, nursing and to bed by 7:15. She is almost 7 months old and goes to sleep on her own for naps and bedtime. It's amazing how easily they realize that you will do whatever they want when they cry. Good luck!
C.

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A.K.

answers from Richland on

I had the same thing happen with my one and only baby girl and there was nothing I can do but continue on to do the same things. It helps if people in the family take turns to rock her and cradle her to sleep, not just you. If your mother or mother in law help out, it helps to do this. Sometimes when you lay them down in the crib, they need something around them so they know they are close to you, such as a blanket near their back to make them feel secure. Of course, I was afraid to do this because of possible SIDS. So my child was in a bassinet first which really gives the baby a feeling of being enclosed in a womb instead of a large crib which might not even be in the same room as you sleep in. They need to smell you to know you are close. You can even keep a shirt you just wore nearby that might have your scent.
Hope this helps. My one year old daughter sometimes still wakes up the minute I put her down but there are lots of reasons for it and you will know all the resons as you are around her more often. Good luck!

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J.G.

answers from Anchorage on

she's gotten used to the warmth and comfort of your arms to sleep! But you can't get anything done if she has to take all her naps in your arms.

You'll have to train her to sleep in her crib or bassinet. It may be stressful for a day or two.. but you'll have to put her down and go back every 5 minutes (but adding 5 minutes each time you go back) and rub her back and reasurre her... without picking her up.... she can cry herself to sleep - it won't hurt her! After a while.. she'll also learn that you'll come back to rub her back and talk to her. so she may also fall asleep waiting for you to do this. If after a half an hour she is still crying, change her diaper, nurse her or give her another bottle then put her down again and do the same thing all over again. You may need to do this for a day or two until she learns, but if you stick to it.. she'll learn that her sleeping place is in the crib or bassinette. The next time you let her sleep in your arms again.. you'll have to start over again.. she'll remember it and start crying for it again!

best wishes...

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K.B.

answers from Bellingham on

I HIGHLY recommend the book "on becoming babywise" it's been passed back and forth between us girls and our babies were sleeping straight through the night at 2 months. To paraphrase roughly let her cry. Avoid at all cost rocking bouncing her to sleep, do you want to be doing that for another year untill you have to break her of that habit then?! let her cry it out for 15 minutes (seems like an eternity at the time) but it isn't!! go in, make sure everything is fine,clean diaper ect. rub her back and bum
then leave again. Repeat untill she is sleeping. You might have 3 days of hell, but persist! You need to teach her that it is okay to fall asleep by herself and that she is fine. Short term pain, long term gain!

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E.N.

answers from Eugene on

have you tried swaddling? My son is 5 months, and I still swaddle him snuggly at night :)

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T.J.

answers from Seattle on

sounds like our 1 month old, colic maybe? For now I'm just letting her sleep with me until it passes, that way we all get more sleep. I'm having her adjusted as well by a chiropractor, I've seen it work for many other families, she does seem to do better on those nights especially. And she also seems to like a bath before bed and a massage too. Good luck!

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T.Z.

answers from Spokane on

I have a 2 year old daughter and a 2 month old daughter. I found that with my 2 year old we always rocked her to sleep and then tried to lay her down gently and sneek out before she would wake up. Now she is a very light sleeper and high maitenance when it comes to going to sleep. It may just be her personality or it may be because we babied her too much when she was young - I don't know. Now with our 2 month old we cuddle her until she is content and then lay her down to fall asleep on her own. I've read in books that this should help them learn to comfort themselves. So far it is working great. Your daughter is probably already forming habits so it may take a few tries. Try not to pick her up if she fusses a little - but you'll know when she is getting too worked up and needs to be settled again. Good luck!:)

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A.S.

answers from Seattle on

There are two different methods I've tried to keep my daughter (4 months old now) asleep when I put her in her crib. The first is to put my hands on either side of her torso like I'm holding her and LIGHTLY squeeze her so she feels like she's still being held. The second is to place my hands on the mattress on either side of her and lightly bounce the mattress. Both methods require about five minutes of leaning over the side of the crib, which can be back-breaking but worth the extra sleep I get!

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J.P.

answers from Medford on

I know this may sound a bit off. My daughter was likethat found out later she is lactose intolerant. Maybe if you switch her to soy .... again check with your dr.

My daughter used to cry when we would stop at light if she were asleep....stop once the car got going.... I know there places you can rent motion pad for infants..

So you know she is now 36 herself with a 3 yr old daughter...So know there is light at the end of the tunnel.

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E.A.

answers from Seattle on

Hi,

For naps, you could try wearing her in a wrap, like a Moby. That way she'll fall right to sleep and you can go about doing your daily activities being close to her. You can even wear her at night too, and then put her down in your (preferably) or her bed when you go to sleep.

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M.C.

answers from Spokane on

i second the comments supporting the idea that you refrain from rocking or bouncing her to sleep. you don't want to "aid" her in going to sleep, because it is actually debilitating her from learning how to fall asleep on her own. and you WANT her to learn how to fall asleep on her own.

other tips for sleepy time is to avoid playing music. when baby finally falls asleep, don't go out of your way to be quiet. you also don't want to teach baby a learned environment for what is normal sleep sounds. that way, when baby becomes accustomed to louder sounds AND sleeps through them, you won't have to rush to answer the phone or quiet the person ringing the doorbell for fear that they will wake your daughter up.

if baby does not accept you immediately putting her in her crib for bed time, you sit in a chair right by her bed. don't talk, just sit with her. she'll eventually fall asleep (though it's not necessarily fun). each day, you'll pull the chair farther to the door--until you're out of the room and baby is falling asleep without your presence. i did this with my little one after reading an article about it and it truly works.

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A.L.

answers from Seattle on

Hi - She might be freaking out because she was asleep in your loving arms and then finds herself lonely in her bed or where ever she's sleeping!

I'm not a cry it out advocate - but you might try putting her down when she's a little less asleep - maybe even just drowsy. Have her spend time where she sleeps when she's awake so it's more familiar.

The other thing that springs to mind is she may have reflux if you are nursing her to sleep - she needs to burp and this hurts and wakes her up.

Good luck - and if you haven't already figured out the Mama Mantra - This too shall pass! A.

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K.R.

answers from Portland on

May just mean she's learning to recognize when you are gone--think about how vital that reflex would have been to an infant's survival even 100 years ago!

If you can't carry-sack her (I couldn't--back injury), read up on the international response to SIDS.

I say this because putting babies on their backs means that if they jerk At All while asleep, they will freak out because they didn't meet physical resistance: this tells them clearly that Mommy Isn't There! On their tummies, the mattress provides that resistance--but ONLY if you don't have a poisonous matress! (DON'T DO THIS without blocking the chemicals from the baby!)

Tummy-laying is also easier for breathing--consider how our organs essentially hang from our back bone. (Think about how much it hurt if someone made you labor on your back--because that squishes the main blood vessel and nerves that feed the uterus.) Again, not a good idea with a regular matress, especially not a new one.

If tummy-laying isn't a choice you feel safe making, which I understand, the wrapping, or a thin (breathable-through) heavy blanket (crochet can work, with a receiving blanket to make it feel "smooth" to the baby) will help prevent or lessen the startle reflex.

A friend told me she saw a respected baby psychologist say on TV that the only two things that a baby naturally fears are loud noises and falling. No. Those things _startle_ the baby--the baby _fears_ abandonment, and the fear kicks in if they startle and find noone there. So sitting with her or singing quietly sometmes help with the no-bounce sleep a couple of people advocate, too, even if it is harder(!) than walking away and letting her cry.

Babies only have needs, and their needs are necessarily natural. And they grow.

(And during her next growth spurt, her body will demand that she sleep--and maybe she won't come back to this wake-up habit. It's all phases. She's learning her world.)

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C.C.

answers from Seattle on

I had the exact same experience with my youngest daughter.
At the six week check up I asked the doctor what I could do
he replied, "women in Korea never lay their babies down but
we are not in Korea". He suggested allowing her to cry. First
just 15 minutes. Go in and pat her back. Leave again and let
her cry again. Pat the back again. Continue until she learns
she is ok in her bed.
Letting her cry was very difficult and I have to admit I let
her go one time for thirty minutes thinking she would stop.
She didn't. I began simply holding her in a front pack while
I did the housework and cared for her older brother. She just slept with me. I considered a king size bed.
She was fussy until she was six months old and switched from
nursing to the bottle. When I began the bottle feeding she
was able to sleep in her own bed.

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V.D.

answers from Eugene on

www.askdrsears.com has great sleep advice there and some insight into why babies wake up from what we consider "deep sleep".

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M.K.

answers from Spokane on

Hi have you tried wearing her? I teach Mom and dad too how to wear their little ones. When my second son was born I wore him all them time and it really helped in keeping him calm. He was a higher needs baby and wearing him was my only saving grace. I just moved to Palouse so I could meet with you and help if you wanted. Just let me know. Also check out this website http://mamatoto.org/Default.aspx?tabid=36 Hope this helps

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J.R.

answers from Seattle on

Hi K., How do you lay the baby down ? on her side or on her tummy ? Oh and do you bundle her up or leave her blankets loose? Sometimes if you wrap them up in a receiving blanket, burrito style it keeps their arms from flapping and keeps them warm and cozy. Also make sure and burp her a more than once, she could have a tummy ache. oh, my best advice is do not keep the baby in a quite enviroment...she'll get used to it and then when she's around noise she'll freek her out.

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K.C.

answers from Portland on

ok, I had that problem w/ my son as well. I read that once a baby has fallen to sleep, they will go through a period of heavy breathing, eyes twitching....but if you wait for about 20-30 min after your child falls to sleep, the heavy breathing and eye twitching will stop, and the baby will have nice steady breathing...then you can put them into the crib. I know it's time consuming, but it works!! My son is now 13 months old, and I still have to hold him for about 45min after he has closed his eyes....it is hard to always do this...but I do not beleive in ferberizing(spelling?)
Good luck....(also, try a nice bath before bed time, Johnsons sleepy soap is great(its the purple container), we use Aveeno now)

Karrina...(my son is our 1st child as well)

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J.M.

answers from Portland on

Until she starts rolling you could try what I did. Laying the little one down in her crib using a soft 'boppie' U shaped pillow to make her feel like she is still being held. I had made my own pillow that was a bit flatter and softer for my babies. I made sure that once my little ones started rolling over I tried other things.

jem- mom to seven

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T.F.

answers from Eugene on

Hands Down!!!

The Happiest Baby
THE HAPPIEST BABY ON THE BLOCK, by Dr. Harvey Karp, has helped parents from working moms to superstars like Madonna and Michelle Pfeiffer calm their babies' ...

www.thehappiestbaby.com/excerpts_book.htm

This is an awesome DVD!!! I didn't read the book but the dvd is wonderful.

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J.L.

answers from Sacramento on

My son was a terrible sleeper in the beginning as well. It seems that they have an alarm that goes off every time you try to lie them down. At 6 months, he still will only nap for 30-45 minute intervals during the day, but usually sleeps through the night. For the first 3 months, the only way that I could keep my sanity and any of us could get any sleep, was to side nurse in bed at night. (I had to hold him for naps during the daytime.) I even tried to move him after we both had been asleep for awhile, but he would still wake up when I moved him. He slept in our bed until he was 3 months and then one night my husband moved him to his crib. He cried for 30-45 mins that night (so did I) but fell asleep and has been there ever since. I swore I'd never do the family bed, but it was the only thing that worked. Good luck and know that it will get better!!

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T.K.

answers from Seattle on

HI K.,
I did the same thing for about 3 months w/ my son, rock him to sleep and then it stopped working for him too. I did 2 things. I know we are not supposed to do this but I started laying him on his tummy to sleep and he liked it and slept much better. Also, I started laying him down when he was awake so he'd learn to sleep on his own. He would cry a bit(sometime for 15 min) at first. But after several days, he would only fuss for a minute or two and then he'd fall asleep on his own. he was a little older that your baby so you could wait to try this approach. My son is 18 months now and he actually says "bed" when he's ready to sleep!
good luck!

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M.C.

answers from Portland on

Hi Kristen,
I am a stay at home mom with two boys, now ages 4 and 7, but who were both VERY fussy babies, "colicky" they called it back then. First you have to ask a couple of questions: is the baby sick? Hungry? Properly burped? This last one is a big one, especially at this age because their little tummies are easily upset. If you are nursing, somtimes what you eat can also upset their tummies, so take a look at your diet as well. One thing I used to do for my boys to help with the transition from being asleep in my arms to putting them into the crib was to place a heating pad set on very low heat in their crib once I got them out to feed or change them. This way, the crib wasn't cold when I put them back to sleep. Of course, remember, SAFETY, SAFETY SAFETY! Never leave the heating pad in the crib, unplug it after use, and make sure to only use the lowest setting. Finally, remember, that little ones at this age are going through so many changes, and sometimes you may not figure out why they are crying. Just remember that "this too shall pass", I promise! Best of luck!
M.

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A.C.

answers from Portland on

Yeah, my four month old does that still too!

Sometimes they can run you ragged and if you let them yell it out, they are all the happier with it. I try to nurse my guy to sleep, but if I have to do more than twice, I just let him yell. It makes my life easier.

Try establishing a naptime/bedtime routine. Turn off lights, disperse essential oils, massage, bath--whatever it takes. And stick to it. It can often takes months and months.

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J.W.

answers from Seattle on

Try elevating her head a little bit. Put her car carrier into her crib, and then put her down in the car seat. Some babies have acid reflux when they lay down flat. She might have heartburn. It's apparently rather common in babies. This worked for my son, and if it doesn't work for your daughter, at least you'll know she doesn't have acid reflux.

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C.G.

answers from Portland on

Hey Krisin,

Things you can try include swaddling (letting the legs remain free because I read somewhere tight swaddles can hurt growing hip bones), warming the blanket in the crib before placing the baby in it, nursing the baby to sleep (full belly seems to keep the baby napping longer), holding the baby for about 20 minutes after she falls asleep, and having her nap during the day in a sling that you wear.

Good luck! The sleeping will get better. Or so everyone tells me. :)

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B.P.

answers from Seattle on

Yes, it's true. A baby that small still needs to feel the warmth and comfort of being held. Like the one mother said, snuggle something around her to make her feel held. Let her cry for three minutes and if she doesn't stop, go in and pat her for awhile, use a soothing soft voice to quiet her. This will make her feel more secure that my mom is still here. Then leave her again and let her cry for a longer period. Repeat if necessary. Don't pick her up! If she learns that you will not pick her up, she will eventually tire herself out and sleep. If she does this when she is older, it is safe to let them cry for 15 min.if you know everything is ok. She has to know that she is fine without being held everytime she goes to sleep.

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L.H.

answers from Seattle on

K....I know this sounds too good to be true, but drop everything you're doing today and go get the book "The Happiest Baby on The Block" by Harvey Karp, MD. It will change EVERYTHING!!!! I came so close to having a nervous breakdown w/my first daughter who I thought had "colic." My 2nd daugther started the same deal and I got the book and it was smooth sailing after that. Seriously...it's a quick read and it makes perfect sense.

Good luck! Hang in there! It's soooooooo frustrating I know.

L.

P.S. Stay at home mom to 8 year old and 5 year old girls.

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C.G.

answers from Seattle on

Try putting a piece of your clothing (shirt / bra, etc...) that smells like you under her head / near her nose when you put her down. A lot of times, babies just need to be reminded of you to rest easy.

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C.H.

answers from Seattle on

Boy, this sounds familiar! You'll read so many things that say to NEVER bounce/rock them to sleep- but if your baby is like mine, she would NEVER sleep if you didn't (and believe me, I tried from day 1)! Some things that helped me: Swaddling, constant motion (like a cradle swing, bouncy seat, stroller, etc.), white noise (sound machine, fan, etc.) Some days I had to hold her the whole time she slept while bouncing on an exercise ball, and even then she would only sleep for 45 minutes or so. Don't let anyone tell you at this age to let them scream- you do what you have to do to get her to sleep! And it will get better- by 6 months I could lay my daughter down in her crib and she would fall asleep on her own, no crying. Two great books to read: Happiest Baby on the Block (Dr. Harvey Karp) and Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child (Dr. Marc Weissbluth). Good Luck!!!

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