How Can I Get My 7Yr Old to Wear Her Jacket?

What is it that concerns you? Short of frostbite, nothing will happen. She either runs super hot, or she will get cold and put on her coat. There is a misconception that people get colds because they are cold, but it's not true. She's not going to get sick because she didn't wear a coat. If she gets cold, by the way, a great response to her complaint is not "I told you so" but rather, "How unfortunate for you that you made that choice." If her hair gets wet because she wouldn't put up the hood, "How unfortunate for you." Don't even go down the road of her not doing what you said - then it becomes about what you want, and that can backfire with stubborn kids.

Let her see that her actions cause the results. On the other hand, if she's comfortable, she shouldn't be forced to wear a coat. I think you can require her to take it with her just in case - either stuffed in her backpack or hooked to the back (if it's safe and it won't get caught on things), but I wouldn't fight this battle because there's no up side to the power struggle.

If she has issues with other clothes, blankets, or fabrics, then I'd say you have a sensory issue to deal with. But if it's just this one item, I'd let it go.

You don't. You let stuff happen. You don't bring her jacket with you. You let her get cold. She will learn.

I do agree that you need to find out if there is something wrong with the coat. Is it too heavy? Is it down and the feathers stick her? Kids usually fidget and wiggle when they are uncomfortable.

natural consequences. forget the jacket, she will get cold and begin to understand why she should wear it.

Just give her a very light weight jacket - think jersey hoodie.
Kids get too hot unless they are outside in freezing weather for hours.
By middle school you just give up.
It was 39 degrees outside at one point yesterday and I saw more than one high school kid wearing shorts.

What you do is allow her to learn from her mistakes.

I told my girl over and over and over and over and over to wear a heavy coat, it's winter. She would wander out in a hoodie or a sweater or jacket. I'd sit and wait and make her go change.

One day I'd had enough. Love and Logic tells us that kids will learn their lesson much quicker if they're allowed to make mistakes, suffer the consequences of their own choice, and we stay out of it.

So we were heading to BMX one day and I remind her it's bitterly cold out. I told her to make sure to get her heavy gloves and hat, it will be very very cold on top of the hill.

She came out in her racing pants and shirt, they're thin fabric, stretchy and they wick away sweat. The pants had leather at the knees and a few other places and they're double thick some places too. But her body, for the most part, is encased in a light weight denim jacket.

I shut my mouth and let her wear it. I figure even if she gets sick she will learn what it is to feel cold.

We went to the track. Warm ups came and went. When she's riding she wasn't cold. When she was waiting she was shivering. Then we took a break for a few minutes to set up the motos. One of our friends had a tent set up with a kerosene heater going inside. I let her go inside, I truly didn't want her sick, I just wanted her to feel the cold and suffer a little bit so she'd understand what it is to not dress warmly in winter.

They were all "Let me give you my coat" and I told them she had been told plenty of times to get a coat and that denim jacket was what she choose. I told the parents what I was trying to do. They said more kids needed to learn consequences for their actions.

So she spent about 3 hours running out of a tent where it was toasty warm to her bike, then she'd ride her race, then run back to the tent.

She wore a coat every single day after that and I didn't have to tell her once to go get it.

She's older now and can make that choice on her own. She comes and snuggles up to me and sort of crawls inside my coat. She had me buy her a coat of her own choosing the other night so now she's wearing a coat again.

I think you need to let her choose what she wants to wear. I do think you need to keep safety measures in your possession in case she does get too much beyond what her body can handle but she does need to get bone cold so she can understand what you've been telling her.

If we constantly tell them they are going to freeze to death if they don't put a coat on then when they go out and they don't freeze to death, well, that makes us liars and they don't have to pay us any attention. We are obviously just not trustworthy.

But if they do go outside and get really really really cold and we don't rescue them, that's when they learn that mom was right.

I'm a HUGE fan of kids learning "natural consequences". This is one of them. You ask her to put her jacket on because it's cold. If she says no, you say, ok, but it's cold out so don't complain if you get cold. Done deal. She will either be ok with her decision or she will be cold, therefore learning next time you tell her to wear her jacket, she will because she will remember the natural consequence of her own decision. Good luck.

As a former school employee I can tell you that some kids just run hot. I was shocked to see mostly boys, some girls, running around at recess in winter in short sleeves. Sure their parents "made" them wear jackets to school but they were quickly discarded in hallways and on the ground. Nobody died or even got sick so don't worry about it. Just make her take it to school, in case she gets cold and changes her mind.

Has she told you why she won't wear her jacket? Maybe she isn't cold. I think this is a natural consequences situation. Let her get cold. She will realize she needs her jacket. It won't hurt her. She won't wait until she has frostbite or hypothermia.

Me, personally, I HATE hoods. Despise them. Unless there's a downpour and no umbrella... usually I just wear a hat in the cold.

My son is 8. Not the age of great choices.... there have been times where I just let him feel cold. He hates his raincoat, so I will just ask him to pack it in his school backpack and use an umbrella. He doesn't like the texture of some coats he has, so we ask him to find something he wants to wear and leave him to it. To me, this isn't worth the battle--plus, it gives him the opportunity to reflect on his own choices. I never say "see I told you", just when he complains of cold, say "oh, yes, it is a cold day, isn't it?" and let it be.

She is 7, she can decide for herself is she is cold or not. If she does not want to wear it don't force her, and if she is cold then she is simply facing the natural consequences of her choices, and will adjust her choices accordingly.

seriously?
duct tape her into it.
i mean, if you don't have enough parental authority to tell your 7 year old 'it's too cold to go out without a coat. put it on now' and have her comply, you need to go get parenting help.
what kind of help could we offer? suggest an escalating series of threats and punishments?
khairete
S.

Can you switch jackets to see if it's something to do with the coat? Or ask her why she won't wear it?

Sometimes it's a phase. I had a friend who's kid would not wear shoes. She would struggle each day and seriously hated mornings because it was this battle over the shoes. The thing is, he'd get to school and have to put them on. You have to wear shoes at school. So he did.

So .. it can be their little willful determination, it could be sensory thing coat just bugs her, or she could be too warm (try lighter version). Sometimes you have to compromise until the phase is over or till you figure out a better solution.

One of my kids wouldn't wear hats. So I did hoods. One wouldn't wear mitts, so he got to pick out cool gloves HE liked. I picked my battles. Good luck :)

Ask her why she does not want to wear the jacket. What does she say? My friend's son has Oppositional Defiance Disorder as well as ADD and has a very quirky and stubborn personality. He never would wear a coat...but the difference with him and a regular kid is he would just go into a complete rage about it. She decided to let him figure it out and stopped telling him to wear his coat. She let him deal with the consequences. About age 9 or 10 he would choose to wear his coat on really cold days. My 11 year old son dislikes wearing his coat also, but on really cold days I say put it in your backpack if you aren't going to wear it. He usually tells me he ended up wearing at at recess.

I had one that went through the phase of refusing to wear a jacket. He owned a lot of fleece shirts and sweatshirts in that time just to keep him warm. We'd bring his jacket along and when he'd inevitably get cold he'd eventually give in. If he wouldn't put one on for something simple like going out to play then he didn't get to go out to play. If it was somewhere we had to be then we just brought the jacket and waited until he gave in and put it on. He never went very long before realizing he was cold and a jacket would help.
Don't make it a battle. It's not worth fighting. You'll win in the end.

R.,

Welcome to mamapedia!!

Sorry - you need to TALK WITH YOUR DAUGHTER and ask her what she doesn't LIKE about her jacket/coat.

Also - you need to let natural consequences happen. If she gets cold? Too bad. That's why you needed to wear your jacket. She will learn to prepare and check to see if she needs her jacket or coat.

My 13 year old son wears shorts year-round. There are days when he comes home from school and said "oops - I should have checked" Those are natural consequences. She needs to learn to take care of herself too.

You need to figure out why she doesn't like the jacket. I allow my kids to be with me when we buy their jackets - even wear 'em around the store to see if they like it. The jacket might be too hot for her...you may have her WAY over dressed.

IAsk her why she doesn't want to wear her jacket. Maybe its uncomftorable? Does she feel embarrased wearing it because her friends don't have to? Unfortunately, not all parents realize the need for properly dressing their children in the winter, although I've noticed that is more common with slightly older kids. Make sure she knows you want her to wear her coat so that you don't have to worry about her being cold or getting sick. Tell her that if she doesn't wear her jacket, she doesn't leave the house. Don't let her play outside, go to friends house, or anything unless she's wearing her coat. That will probably change her mind really quick.