hey fellow mothers i'm a mother of a year old baby boy.my question to my fellow mothers is how do you teach your one yr old to listen?does every yr old keep doing things even when you stay stop, don't ,no a million times.i'm trying to teach my son with out physical discipline.but it's very hard like i said i've tried every thing no,don't stop in a soft voice on his level .i've tried raising my voice.i've tried giving him a real serious face.he just laughs and keep doing what he wants.sometimes i'll pop him and he'll laugh.i really don't want to get into hitting him.plus i don't want him to think it's okay to hit.sometimes i'll put him in his crib when all else fails.my mom said i shouldn't do that because he really won't want to sleep in there.well i just wanted to know if anybody is having this same problem or is my son just going to be bad boy.
One thing that I have noticed that helps is a visual. Basic Sign language at this age can sometimes help. There are tons of books at the library to show you these easy words and they help to get the point across. Hope this helps.
-Dr. Heather
Are you sure he understands the word "Stop"? At this age, they may repeat words, but most likely do not understand all they say.
Try playing the "Stop and Go" game with him. Play music, dance around (or just move to the music), then turn off the music while saying "Stop" and don't move. Then say "Go", start the music and move around again. By showing him what "Stop" and "Go" mean you may have a better chance of him responding correctly.
You just have to be firm & patient. No, maybe a little slap on the hand, not hard will work. I have a 3 year old. IO don't think putting him in his crib will hurt. Do you have a time out chair? That may help. Good luck.
one thing i've learned with kids is if you say "don't *fill in the blank*" all they hear is that second part. it's better to tell them what to do instead. like instead of saying "don't run" you'd say "walk". i know that doesn't help in every situation, but hopefully it helps a little bit :)
It may not be too early to start time out. Instead of putting him in his crib, sit him on the couch and enforce time out. By enforcing I mean, before you sit him down, take away anything that could be a distraction (toys, tv, stuffed animals, etc.). Then sit him for time out and sit with him to make sure that he doesn't get up. If he's calm enough, try to explain to him why he's on time out. Sometimes they understand, and sometimes they don't but getting into the habit of explaining it will be a great asset in the future.
If for some reason, you are unable to sit down with him, I've used the highchair in the past. He may kick and scream but again, explain it to him; show him what he did wrong. If you're afraid that he won't want to eat in his high chair, show him the difference between him going to the high chair to eat and you placing him in the high chair for time out.
My son is two and I have to do this with him constantly because he doesn't listen. He started his terrible two's when he was 18 months. Sometimes, he keeps on tantruming and other times, he will calm down to listen and repeat what I am saying to him. For a one year old, a time out of a minute or two is just enough.
But, if you're kid's as tough as mine, popping him once in a while may be the only way, as long as you're popping him in the right place (ex. hands, butt, etc.) and for the right reason. I'm at the point where I give my son a chance to do what needs to be done by the count of three with my hand raised. If it's not and he gets popped, he understands that he was wrong and I can send him to his room for disobeying. Good luck!
Consistency is key. I also don't think that by putting your son in his crib will make him not want to sleep there. Try to explain that it is a time-out. I do that with my daughter and it seems to work. Also, this may sound crazy but ignore bad behavior. Eventually he'll realize he's not getting to you and stop.
first u put on ur lap turn from left to right like the sign no,then with ur finger pointing at him saying the words no,don't and stop,and look at him straight in the eyes when u are talking to him.Thats my avdice, try it out. Good luck
It's not going to happen overnight and he may not understand "no" right now, but it is the right time to start "correcting" behavior and establishing rules. As the other mom's said find something other than crib for punishment. I believe that if you start using good language now, he will respond to your voice in the future without the need for timeout chairs etc. Be specific and pick your battles. Avoid saying "don't do that" because "that" is such an abstract term. Say "don't throw the blocks." Let your child know that this behavior makes you upset and follow up with an alternative that will make both of you happy and explain all of this to him. Finally, remember to stand your ground and be consistent.
You are his role model, so if you hit & shout, he will think that's okay. You can be forceful in re-directing his attention, but avoid hitting. The other thing you may want to try is a reward system rather than a punishing system. I keep a huge tub of small lollipops and oreo cookies on "the special shelf". My son knows that for good behavior he can choose one. When he is being bad I tell him that if he listens to mommy & shows good behavior he can have a reward. THe concept seems advanced for his age, but it is never too soon to start. At this age, the reward has to be immediate. Try telling him to "stop throwing blocks" for example. When you get his attention, show him the reward & say IF you stop doing ? THEN you can have ?. Of course don't let the reward turn into anything other than a reward for good behavior. If you can get him to respond to this concept, potty training will be easier. This will take alot of effort up front, but you will reap the rewards later. Good luck.
hi i have twin 1 yr old boys and i can totaly relate to u accept i have it in a double dose haha. what i have done is bought a play yard and put it in the living room rather than put your son in the crib try leaving him in there as hard as it is to walk away and avoid tantrums etc it does work i just walkaway for a while and do some housework and find they are ok after 5 or so minutes...as for the no dont touch etc its is good to start intilling that into ur child but in my opinion from my experience i still think they are a little to young to completely understand and do what we ask i tap my boys on the hand and say no if they have done something wrong soem people dont beleive in it but i was raised with a tiny tap to the hand and alot of other ppl have been raised that way and we all turned out fine.
i would keep doig that give it a few months or more and im sure yu will find they understand and will react a bit more then alot of people willtell you to try the naughty corner but in mycase impossible to make a 1 yr old sit and listen again some 1yrd old boys may but my boys are very active children .
this is just going off my experience so far every child is different but the play area is my life saver if u want details on the one i have that is roomy enough to fit toys etc in and allow them to still be able to walk and run around just contact me and ill send you the information. ____@____.com i wish u all the best
They all go through this. Have you tried more then just saying no. Remove him for the thing you want him to stop doing. You have to say things more then 15 times before they start to understand at this age.
your mom is right about the crib. If you use it as a punishment, then he will not want to sleep in it. Sleeping time will be a bad thing to him. At one year old, he is really to young to have time outs, as he won't understand. Keep telling him in a very firm voice not to do what he is doing, and when you tell him not to do it, take him away from the activity. If he is touching something he shouldnt' touch, tell him "Don't touch *" and then give him something else and say "here you go." He will do the unwanted thing again, because of his age and short attention span, but if you keep at it, he will learn to stop when you say so. My son is 15 months old, and since before he was a year old, he understood no, no touch, naughty boy, naughty baby. He willcry when you say those things because he knows he is in trouble. He will stop what he is doing though. I can even point to something he threw on the floor and tell him to give it to me and he will. It just takes time and patience to do this. Also, make sure the tone you use when you correct him is only used when he is being corrected. He will respond to the tone before understanding the words. Good luck.
liz
a sting on the but hurts less than an electrical shock
replace crib with playpen bed should not be a punishment at his age
Consistency is the key. Pick one command like 'no' or 'stop' and ALWAYS use the same command. Say it firmly and say it every time. It will be very tedious but also very necessary. Also, I didn't want my son to pick up hitting either so when he didn't respond to 'no' I plucked him. That really worked!
It's a long road ahead... good luck!
my daughter is the same way.. shes now 2 and a half and still does what she wants.. ive given her little spankings before on the wrist and butt when she deliberately does something that she knows shes not supposed to do...honestly i wish i never started doing that because now she hits me back sometimes and calls me a "bad girl"..but sometimes u just cant help it.. ive tried it all--talking nice, talking mean, time outs, bla bla bla... its just part of growing up i guess..im sure they will turn out just fine!! good luck i know it gets very stressful
Our children see us (we mothers) as nurturers. They come to us when they want to feel safe, so we have to work even harder to get them to take us seriously. I have used the method of popping their hand, using a stern voice, putting them in the corner, I have recently discovered that using a squirt bottle can control a child that does not listen...try it all. Something's bound to work. But yes, children at that age are a challenge, and you will have to repeat yourself a lot. Your son's about to go through the terrible two's too. Good Luck, and be patient and stern.
