How to Fire My Nanny?

A., I believe that you should be honest with her about why you must find a new nanny. It may be difficult for you to do, as well as for her to hear, but you will be doing her a great service. As a teacher, I find that in life you must always be looking to help instruct people who seem to need it. It extends outside of the classroom and this girl clearly needs to be directly told that her lazy manner and inability or unwillingness to change are what has led you to replace her. Hopefully she can learn from it and when future families tell her that they are looking for more out of her, she will get with it.

I don't think it takes any special training to come up with structured activities and projects. If someone is advertising themself as a nanny, such things come with the territory. If she WANTED to, she could easily Google some activities to do, or pick up a few little books on kids' projects/activities--like the rest of us do.

I also do not think that you should give her a 2 weeks notice. The 2 weeks severance is more than sufficient. After all, it is the income during those 2 wks that is the important part for her, and it sounds like you should really move on asap.

Good luck!

I agree with what Robin D said -- if you're paying the 2 weeks severance, I would not have her work after the date you're telling her she's fired. Two weeks of extra pay should float her while she looks for a new job if she gets the time to look immediately! Who knows how she'll react with your kids while you're not around? Just give her the check for the extra 2 weeks and tell her you wish her good luck.

Do tell her the real reasons she's being let go so she can learn from her mistakes -- if she's been given reasonable warnings about what you want her to do and she's not doing it, that's fair. I wouldn't necessarily mention about the bilingual desire, though. That's sort of unfair to her since YOU hired her knowing she was NOT bilingual. That's like saying "I made a mistake and you're getting fired for it." Not fair to change the expectations after the fact/after the hire. Expecting the kids to do activities and projects, that's totally reasonable. Expecting the nanny not to SLEEP at your house during the daytime hours, also extremely reasonable!

A., sounds like you have several issues going on. A good heart to heart with her may fix the problem. Not just "telling her" nanny's as a rule are not there to teach. they are there to care for the children. it sounds like your looking for a preschool type program in the daytime. is she trained for that? if not she may not even know how to proceed with that. maybe get the kids enrolled in a part time program that she can drop them off at. as far as safety you definitely need a handle on that. if she is sleeping and neglecting children you need to get rid of her. But if its nap time and she dozes next to them then that's different.

I would just tell her what you have mentioned as the problem. You say that you tried to talk with her about it to get her on track but it is not working out. Sometimes things just don't workout at all. Also, you can mention that you want someone bilingual as well, though as a side line. Telling her straight the main concerns will possibly help her in the future, especially if she wants to continue taking care of children.

Hi A.,
You could just explain to her your concerns as the reason why you are heading in a different direction with a new nanny. If you are concerned about the safety of your children then this is certainly reason enough! As they always say, it is not what you say but how you say it. If presented in a nice manner, I am sure you can avoid making her feel horrible and resentful. I am not so sure about the 2 week notice though. I am not sure I would be comfortable having a nanny watch the kids after I have told her she will be replaced. I think the 2 wk pay is sufficient. Also, mention the lanquage and educational part...i do think this part can offend.
Good luck and if you feel really bad, you can always pull a "it's not you, it's me: :)