Husband Logic.

Ahh! Boss Fan! That is so my husband.
"Where's the peanut butter?" (The peanut butter that he uses EVERY.DAY and leaves on the counter beside the toaster, or on the island, or wherever, and I put back on the exact same shelf in the pantry every. day.)
Me: In the pantry?
Him: I don't see it.
Me: Look on the shelf on the right side about elbow high.
Him: It's not there.
Me: (get up and go into the kitchen, ease past him into the pantry door, move the jar of peanuts---that he was standing there eating out of while looking or the peanut butter---and pick up the peanut butter and hand it to him).
Him: (when I am almost into the kitchen) You don't have to come get it, you can just tell me where it is....

AUGHGHGH!!!!

For the most part my husband maintains but occasionally he stumbles through the man brain fog bushes. The other night he graciously offered to wash bottles and get them ready for daycare for the next day. I pump at work so it is a combination of formula bottles and breastmilk bottles. When he got done with bottle duty, I noticed there were more formula bottles than I expected. I asked him why. He said oh there wasn't enough breastmilk to make a full bottle so he threw the extra breastmilk away and made a formula one instead. I gave him a very hairy eye and I told him the next time he hooks his boobs up to the pump and does the jersey cow routine while at the office, then he can decide if and when to throw out breastmilk. In the meantime he better not so much as even spill a drop of that stuff.

Sometimes, I really feel sorry for men...because of having to deal with women.

__________
My husband is very smart and all together. Then again, I don't treat him like an idiot, or assume he's a man, so he must be an oaf.

my ex once said to me "I thought ALL pants go with ALL shirts. I mean an outfit is just pants and a shirt, right?"

yes, honey........

I am constantly venting about my husband, even though he is a great dad and a great husband, he is a man. My mom constantly tells me, "If you continue to think that he should think like us, you'll constantly be upset." They just don't think like us and we unfortunately just have to deal with it. Common sense is not as common as we would like it to be, and common sense for a man and a woman is usually different. A woman would ask what's wrong, do you need anything, etc. A man, unless you say something, will go on doing whatever they were doing or going to do.

LOL, yeah, we have little spats about what goes in which kitchen utensil drawer. One way makes sense to him, one way makes sense to me. Which leads to each of us looking in each kitchen drawer every darned time we're trying to find something. I could just agree to his "logic," however, he never sticks w/ the same drawer so there IS NO logic.

Not to be mean but your mom having a mental breakdown 1,000 miles away has no baring on your husband going to get exercise. It also may be his way of blowing off steam (ie: stress, depression, sadness) about the dog.

About the can opener - that is funny. Hubby always comments I am rearranging our cabinets/drawers and he can't find stuff so I stopped doing that. Now everything has it's place...unless our 3.5 year old son moves it (like he did with a can opener and put it under the ellitpical I get on EVERY night in our LIVING room and we bought another because we could not find it!) LOL

Husband logic = not thinking

My hubby will be standing in the kitchen and ask me (who is in another room) if we have something (bread, butter, dressing, whatever). Sometimes he's already has the pantry or refrigerator door open (no not really looking just standing there waiting for me to tell him where it is). He often will tell me something isn't there, I direct him and he's still empty handed. I walk into the room and there it is...right where I said.

Today, he text me to call him. I do, he wants the doctor's number (which I can look up on my phone but not when I'm on the phone with him). He then asks me about our insurance (which is through his employer AND he has his own card...and will need to give the info to the doctor since this is a new visit for him). He got mad when I said "Honey, can you please look at your card".

What makes it worse is that my boss is the same way. I am so frustrated all the time at both work and home.

Seriously....they can't be THAT helpless!

I'm not sure what it has to do with "logic" that your husband went to his scheduled activity when he was supposed to.

You're dealing with your hyperactive sister...what is your husband supposed to do? He's not your mother, to sit there and pat you on the back while you try and calm your sister down. The way I see it, there's nothing he can do in that situation and if it were ME, I'd rather my husband LEAVE the house (or the room, whatever) so I could try to concentrate on my sister/mother/whatever. I am not trying to downplay whatever the issue was, but really, what do you expect of him?

Now, on the can opener thing, I get it. My husband doesn't do that, but he does leave onion peels on the counter ABOVE the trash can. Really? You can't throw them away yourself? THEY STAIN THE COUNTER!!!

He also...not kidding...KICKS his dirty clothes out of the bathroom, and down the hall, into our room, and over to the hamper...where he leaves them on the floor. Next to the hamper. Seriously? Would've been easier on both of us if he'd just picked them up, carried them over, and put them in. It's like it's a game.

***UPDATE*** Sorry, didn't realize you had a baby to look after. I understand how that goes. I just know how it's usually helpful to me if my husband leaves while I'm trying to deal with someone on the phone...and I really wasn't trying to downplay what was going on with your mother. Just that your husband probably wouldn't be able to help.

I am another lady that thinks men and women are quite different. However frustrating it can be at times...I am glad I am not married to myself. We help eachother learn so much from our differences. Daily lessons in patience...forgiveness..compassion...

Picture this:

My (hot) amazing hubby was making the kids Top Ramen over the Christmas break.(Hey don't judge us on the food choice. Santa put this "treat" in their stockings...and my husband took it upon himself to make them lunch) So I walk in and see said husband with a big fork and dangling Ramen noodles over the pot as he has scissors(yes I said scissors) in the other hand and he is trimming the noodles. I asked him what he was doing. He said the noodles were to long. What the heck?!? I told him to hold it right there because it just had to be documented!!

This is a man that is very successful in business and our community...and he trims Ramen noodles with flippin' scissors because they are too long..

This man is the love of my life. I would choose him all over again...because I did not marry him for his cooking skills.

As for the can opener. That is funny!! How about you turn the kitchen upside down and put things in random places. Then he will get the lesson on why it is important to put items back where they are suppose to go. (Or some other items that he uses every day.) Women are known to be better at multitasking and time management. To him it is a non issue..you eventually found the can opener. To you it wastes a lot of time and could be done better.

Good luck and best wishes!!

Good men have a hard time when their women are upset . . . hence the hasty retreat to the gym. I'm not saying it's right, per se - just that it's something I've noticed over the years.

The can opener - I have no insight there. :P

First- so sorry about your dog, that is such a hard decision to make and hard thing to do.

Second- vent away! you have certainly earned it.

Perhaps our husbands share a brain, this is something my husband would do as well. I'm thinking it's not that you necessarily need him to stay home, you just need him to offer- and see what he can do to help. Here is something my hubby has done for YEARS. We are going to leave to go to church or wherever, so we all need to leave at X time. He gets himself ready and gets into the car at X time, sometimes honking, sometimes just coming in and announcing that we are late. Really? I am running around packing diaper bags, letting the dog out, etc. Now like you, I realize he is not a mind reader and I know if I just say, hey babe please help me do x, y, z he totally would. But we do this routine every time we leave the house! I can't believe it doesn't occur to him that there are things he could do without me asking him! So crazy.

I hope you feel better getting this off your chest and reading that many other husbands would do the same thing! And I hope your mom is ok.

LOL. Mine has a smartphone with a weather app and access to the internet to get more information. He calls me at work and asks me what the weather is going to do ! (He works outdoors.) Makes me want to scream and pull my hair out - especially when I am busy.

momma w i think its brilliant to trim those insanely long noodles although i J. break them in half when they are dry

i think he was right to go to the gum
as for the canopener
my boyfriend likes to place toenail clippers in odd places and when i say they should be kept in the bathroom he replies, "who made that stupid rule? i can clip my nails downstairs on the couch more comfortably......" ewwwwwwww!

Was your husband not suppose to go to his activity because you had a crisis with your sister, that wouldn't include him anyway? I'm lost on that one. And by the way, there is NO logic whatsoever in how men operate. They are not mind readers, although we women expect them to be. I have been putting away dishes and other items in the same place for YEARS. If my husband empties the dishwasher, there is no telling where the items will be. It's like a search and rescue mission. Does it frustrate me, hell yes. However, in looking at the big picture.......it's not a big deal. Just something for me and my girlfriends to laugh about behind his back. :-)

Is he allowed to determine the placement/storage of any items of shared use?

We have the "short handled" drawer and the "long handled" drawer...if the kitchen item has a short handle, i.e. the can opener (short handle drawer)...if the item has a long handle, i.e. a spatula (the long handle drawer).

Then we have the one drawer in it with every item that never sees the light of day...

Sorry, but I think that I follow your husband's logic better than yours in these cases. He had no reason not to stick to his schedule. Your sister was freaking out, but you were handling it. Had he put the can opener in the "weird place"? Maybe that was his way of telling you that his location is logical and yours is...not.

Yes, my husband does not seem to be fluent in English sometimes. Here's a recent story that made me have to just get off the phone with him. He was getting some warranty work done on his car. Because it was dragging out, the mechanic told him that he would reimburse us for the rental charges, which ended up totalling about $700. My husband asked me if I thought we should let him cut us a check or just use the credit for future repairs. He said that he didn't see any immediate future needs for repairs, so he would take the check. (I keep the accounts and always know what's going on with the money.) I asked him maybe two times since he said that he would get a check from the guy, in about a two- to three-month period. (I do better about keeping up with money, AND we were spending a lot of money right then, and I had told him that I was trying to keep up with everything that we were spending.) The first time, he just said that he'd forgotten and would contact him. A few weeks ago, I called myself reminding him--"Hey, what's the status on the reimbursement?" His response (with plenty attitude): "Well, I was just gonna use the credit, but since you're gonna keep nagging me, I'll go get a check." Really?? YOU are the one who said that you would get the check. Idiot.

Comomom, I am raising your H right now with my son!

I completely understand your frustration with your H leaving like its any normal day. We went to visit my moms grave for the first time after she died. I burst out crying and my H walked away. "I thought you would want to be alone." ? !

Anytime anyone threw up everyone in my family (males) would just stand there looking. Like they were deer in headlights! If yelled go get a towel or a wash cloth, they looked at me like they had never seen one and had no idea where one might be! Seriously.

I just went through this thing with my H about laundry. We have always had a double hamper in the bathroom. One for towels, underware and socks and one for clothes. Lately I had been finding clothes in the towel side, after 20 years or so of separating them? So I gently reminded H. Next night, everything's good. Next night clothes, underware and socks all in clothes side? He said I was fine till you said something. Not really.

I have to remind myself he does an important job for military aircraft. This stuff is hardware not software.

I think men are wired completely different from women. I could go on and on, but it just seems to me like it's a fact of life. I had an incident this morning with my husband. I have an older cell phone, so I don't have all the fancy apps like most people do, partly because my husband is too cheap to invest in one for me. He has a Smartphone with all the apps, but his work pays for it. Well, I was sitting in the lobby of the car dealership awaiting my car to be fixed. My husband texts me and tells me to find out what time our son's hockey game is this evening. Mind you, he's sitting at his computer at his desk and texts me on his Smartphone...hello, anybody home upstairs? He has all the emails, phone numbers, and schedules relating to hockey on his phone. Plus, HE'S the one who takes our son to all the hockey stuff....so, why is he asking me to find out the game time?

I'm sorry about your mom, J.. I can't imagine what she is going through. Your husband probably thought "Jen's got this" and wanted to get the heck out of Dodge. Not cool. Not cool.

Good grief about the can opener. How about you move his underwear and when he asks why it's not in the old place, parrot back his answer. I'll bet he'll "get it" then!

Dawn