I Don't Know That's Not My Tribe.

Unfortunately I do not think we are well educated about American Indians. I do know enough to realize they have their own languages and traditions, but I do not know what they are.

I am going to hope she did not mean this as disrespect, but instead it is just ignorance on her part.

I am of Hispanic heritage and it is amazing to me what people say when they first meet me.. "Gee, you do not even have an accent." "Gosh you seem educated." "I would have never guessed you were a Mexican. You don't act like one."

I just smile and think, "bless their hearts.. They are so clueless.."

No, you're not being sensitive at all. I think that you should help to educate MIL as well as other Americans.

Turn those moments into something positive. The U.S. educational system only talks about "Native American Indians", lumps all the various tribes into a undifferentiated mass. Most U.S school children only get introduced to a very mediocre *example* of the American Indian--and Hollywood portrayal of tribal life/culture was even more unfair. If someone were to say something stereotypical, take it as an opportunity to share your culture with them.

Honestly, I wish our Native American Indian populations would speak louder and more often on this topic, because sadly, as long as those who know the details stay silent, The Native American experiences be a silent culture.

"O' Great Spirit, help me always to speak the truth quietly, to listen with an open mind when others speak, and to remember the peace that may be found in silence."
~ Cherokee Prayer

I understand your frustration. People have a tendency to lump similar things together without understanding that there are separate distinct parts. I think I would use the opportunity to educate her on what my heritage was. "I don't know what the ______ tribe eats, but my grandmother who was an _______used to cook ______. It does seem she wants to learn more about your native culture. She would probably be asking same types of questions and making the same assumptions if you were from another country or another state (stereotypes)

It's called stereotypes ... it's like this all over in all kinds of groups, Food is a huge thing too I have a friend who is a Chef, Norther Italy is his specialty ... people expect him to make a marinara sauce and that it tastes more like a Sicilian sauce, but Tuscany is more hearty/meat based flavors vs Southern Italy that are more veggie based ... "sauce is sauce" people say ... I know it's not the same thing but it kinda is too. I think a simple, I was not aware the Arapahoes, or Hopi tribes did that, we do this instead ... interesting different areas have different priorities, Blackfoot would hunt larger game being from Montana (I think) where as Hopi would need other hunting skills in the dryer climate areas of the southwest. I understand your senstivities about comments like these but I would turn it around and give them an education politely of course.

I think it happens with just about every culture. We are all supposed to be able to answer any and every question people from another culture/country/background have about our's. It's just people not thinking about it before asking.

No, I don't think too sensitive...just that you are frustrated with people's ignorance...

Just because someone is Native American Indian - does NOT mean that they followed the Apache beliefs...this may sound wrong - but it's an analogy - just because one is Christian - doesn't mean they have the same beliefs...how many religions are there? TONS!!! So just like an Indian - each tribe is different....beliefs, customs, etc. it's just ignorance on her part and many others because they ASSUME....

No, I think it is an assumption about every culture. I'm part Irish and people assume I should speak Gaelic and know everything about the culture for some reason. I would love to someday, but right now no I don't. I could go on and on about what people assume I should know based on my culture and race, but I won't...it'd just turn into a big ol' rant :P

Hi J. - the answer to your question is probably yes AND no.

Sadly, unless she tried on purpose to learn about the different Native American cultures, she's not going to have a clue that there are so many. Schools don't spend ANY time teaching it, at least they didn't when I was young (I'm in my 40's). The only reason I have a clue is that I developed an interest as a kid, read some books about the different tribes, paid attention at museums, noticed that there were differences in tribes in the movies, etc.

I can't begin to understand how it is for you - it has to be frustrating and annoying. And I can't think of anything to compare it to to help you out.

The only thing I can think of is to kind of teach the people that are REALLY interested, and try to shrug off the clueless ones. The ones who care will appreciate learning and it may open them up to learning some really amazing things - all because you can share with them pieces of your heritage.

I think any more people just dont think before they speak. There is so much information available now that is overwhelming at times to know who goes with whom. Granted some people (hopefuly not your MIL) are rude with their questions but I think there are a lot of us in the world that wish we knew more about the world and the people around us. Take the opportunity to educate with the knowledge you do have but then let them know you can't go into detail of the other tribes because you haven't had to luxury of learning about them as of yet.
Best Wishes!

sorry about that. most people don't know much about native americans, and yes, they get lumped together a lot. i'm afraid that you might have to just develop thicker skin. most of us would "get it" if you said, "that's a different tribe, i don't know anything about them." but i think you might have to expect to say it a lot. we mean well :)

I think it's because when you look in the U.S. history books, the tribes are almost always referenced very generically as "Native Americans." It's not unless you get into specific situational history that the tribes are even referenced by name.

For instance, how many people even know that North Dakota and South Dakota were named after Native Americans in a wide region referred to as the Dakota (and Lakota)? Not very many, especially since you see people thinking it's a "kyoot" name for their babies. Talk about cultural misappropriation.

I just don't think that it's on a lot of people's radar that different tribes and different tribes' names actually mean that they're ethnically different the same way Swedish are different from British and Danish and German and Lithuanian and Italian.

I get a very blank stare if I mention that my mother's side of the family descends closely from three different tribes of Native American and First Nation Canadian. They just need to hear, "Italian, Canadian, Native American, Native Canadian." Anything else means nothing to them. I just smile and nod, and educate when someone seems receptive.

Just answer honestly, Nope, I'm Apache/Blackfoot, not Cheyenne. You can even say I'm Apache/Blackfoot not all Native American tribes. Say it nicely calmly and be prepared to repeat it a lot. If you say it like No I'm not German/English descent, I'm Swiss/English. Its not meant as an insult but you should help educate so set the record straight without getting upset. People just dont know. Its sort of the same as thinking Spanish, Mexican, Puerto Rican, Columbian, etc etc are the same culture. (Well at least they share a language- which Native Americans didnt.

Not at all!!! I dont have any Native American ancestry, but I would get irked about it as well.

I didn't know that either - thank you for being a messenger of information! Maybe if you looked at it that way, it wouldn't bother you so much.

I think sometimes people are just excited to be able to show that they "know" something about you or that they can relate to you in some way. Your question reminded me of a time when I was working for a very large company that employed literally thousands of people in the city I was living in. I would often go to the store (or some other public place) before or after work, and inevitably, some well meaning person would see my uniform and say, "Oh, you work there! Do you know my friend Jim?" No last names, nothing. It was both funny and frustrating because of the sheer ignorance. While my experience has nothing to do with identity or heritage, I think it is still a similar reaction where your mother-in-law and others are excited to be able to share some part of your knowledge (or so they think). It's really a kind of a compliment, and as others have said, it's a good opportunity to kindly educate others about your background.

Well I am not Native American and know only what is in the Social Studies books. So mostly the Iroqious nation is lumped together, the Seneca in FL, the western Navajo and others from southwestern US, the plains, the upper NW tribes.
Intellectually I know that each has their own language, each has their own customs, but as one who is ignorant I too would lump them together. I wouldn't know that the Arapaho is any different from the Blackfoot or the Souix for that matter.
The best way to help those around you is to educate them. Say "In our tribe we dont' do it that way." or "The Blackfoot do it this way."
Advocate for your tribe. Be the voice to help those of us who don't "get it". America needs people like you to speak up.
I truly feel that our books have done a disservice to the Native Americans in this country. Either they are very stereotypical and geared towards k-3 readers or way over a child's head until they reach 11th-12th grade.