I Need Suggestions...

I would talk to the teacher face to face, and when my daughter was in public school, I had been known to confront the parents who sent sick children to school as well. I didn't win any popularity contests, but what would typically happen is that my oldest would catch something at school, and bring it home to the baby, who was asthmatic. The whole time that my daughter was in public school, I spent my days working and going to college, then hanging out in the emergency room at night with one or both of the children. That year, the little one even got double pneumonia and ended up in the hospital. It was not a pleasant time for us, and removing them from school improved their health tremendously. I know that homeschooling is not an option for everybody, but I would make it known to the teachers and the parents that they need to teach their children some manners and also keep them home when they are sick.

Ask your sons teacher if you can come teach a "germ fighting" class, most teachers love for parents to come get involved plus it gives the teachers a little bit of a break. You could teach them to cover their mouths when they cough or sneeze(I recommend covering it with their arm, just inside the elbow to prevent germs on hands), you could teach them how to wash their hands properly and for a good length of time (long enough to sing happy birthday twice), and maybe teach them how to sanitize after touching their faces, noses, etc. My kids school has hand sanitizer in dispensers in every classroom and in the cafeteria if yours doesn't you could give each kid a small bottle of it to keep at their desk or in their locker. You might even talk about blowing the nose in a CLEAN tissue each time and throwing it directly into the trash. Anyway, just some suggestions. I think the teacher would be appreciative and I think the kids would benefit tremendously.

Dear C.:
I would see the teacher in person and first of all verify that you heard the story right. Not that your child lies deliberately, but if the teacher repeats or confirms what you heard, your child is not in the middle anymore. You can then directly discuss that with the teacher. Plus, you can then talk to that girl's parent and say that you heard it from the teacher, which by then you will have.

The teacher's reply is unacceptable and not true (if anything, boys are more likely than girls to be gross on purpose, but this is a health issue, too). If she was not paying attention, perhaps she should have stopped and listened. If she was, perhaps she can explain to you why coughing at someone is not a big deal. If she really thinks so, cough a couple of times into her face at close distance. I am sure you will get a reaction.

However, if the teacher disputes the story, you have a bit of a problem, since you were not there. In that case, I would just discuss with her what the proper thing to do is, if such a thing occurs and the girl refuses. My point is that you should not be aggressive until you hear both sides, and a lot of your tone should depend on the answers you get from the teacher. You can and should still take it up with with girl's parents.

Regards,
W.

I would talk to the teacher one on one & remind her your child can only miss so many days of school before they are held back. So you'd like her help to keep that to a minimum & make sure the kids are not COUGHING in each others faces. I bet if you talked to her face to face, she might be a bit more understanding. I would definetely voice your concerns. My daughter just started Kindergarten this year and she has been sick quite a bit. She has asthma & catches stuff more easily. I keep in close contact with the teacher by e-mail. So that's another option for you. Hope this helps!

Anytime I have had an issue with something my daughter has experienced at school, I have written an email to her teacher to discuss my concern. Each and every time, I've been able to resolve the issue with that simple email, except one in which the teacher thought my note was serious enough that she called me to reassure me the issue would be handled.

Sometimes teachers say "That's just what boys/girls do..." because they're busy, pre-occupied or just not really paying attention or don't realize how important the issue is. When a parent brings it to their attention, however, it puts it in a whole new light and I doubt very seriously she will be so flippant in her attitude with you.

If it were me, I would just send her an email with my concern and see how she handles it before I elevated it to something more. Of course, if she doesn't respond or responds in a way that's not sufficient, I would then respond with a phone call to her or her superior as appropriate. Good luck!

I think this is going to happen....but......the response from the teacher was inadequate not to mention bigoted........little girls aren't genetically predisposed to do this and I wouldn't want my son taught that kind of thing.......I would talk face to face to the teacher and you cannot get expression in email. Good luck and hope he feels better fast!

Hey C.,
I am a mother of a two year old boy, and I completely understand your concern. I myself am an educator, but I work for the Boys and Girls Club. In other words, I get to deal with all of the kids that no one really cares about. Way too often I hear my kids come in after school saying the same things, and then when the kids get sick I get sick and take it home to my son! What I make sure I have constantly in my room at the Club are kleenex, hand wipes, and hand sanitizer. Not that being clean and keeping a clean room isn't important, but sometimes teachers have so much on thier hands that one child coughing on another seems unimportant. Even though it isn't, I can understand both sides of the story. Schools don't give teachers much money for them to order a continuous supply of "clean keepers." You could always express your concern and then ask your son's teacher if you can be of help by supplying some of those needs, and maybe even ask if you can give a 10 min. instructional to the kids on how to stay "germ free." With all of the germs that float around any educational facility, it would be really good to have such a presentation for the kids. Sometimes we have to remember that not all mom's teach the same things, and cleanliness is one of those things that is definitely not universal!

Contact the teacher immediately. Either in person (probaly best) or by e-mail. Re-explain the situation that your child has already explained to her. Dont accuse her of not listening to your child in the first place. (dont want no bad blood started) Just tell her you would like her to speak to the little girl. And ask her to teach proper hygiene to her. At 8, the little girl should, notice i said should, know better. Some children are just not taught proper hygiene by their parents. Explain to her how ill your son was. And just tell her you would like to prevent this from happening again. You are not being overly protective, I too would have a talk with the teacher if it was my child. Afterwards, follow-up with your son to see how the situation is going. It may take a couple of days, unfortunately. But if there are no results, your next step would be the school counselor. Good Luck. Hope your little one is feeling better.

i would so talk to the teacher face to face because it will have more impact then over the phone. it will show that u mean what ur saying and how u feel.

I would email and cc the principal.

If I didn't get a response within 2 days I'd call and ask for a conference with both.

S.

Calm down for a min. You werent there you don't know exactally what the teacher said children can misunderstand or over exagerate. You dont want to come at the teacher in a negitive mannor instead voice your concern in a positive way and come at it with a sulution. The main way germs are spread is though contact that is why keeping your hands clean is so important. Suggest that the children should have a hand washing time, also you can give your son anti bacterial wipes or hand sanitizer (kid friendly you don't want him getting high on the alcohol) you may also look into that airborne that was created by a teacher to help against sickness. Hope this helps.

Send the Costco size of sanitizer, boxes of wipes, a boxes of tissues and a note to the teacher saying that you understand that cold season is here and want to make sure his/her classroom is prepared with supplies...and that you are willing to provide more if the need arises. Not only will the teacher understand your concern, you have provided a solution and not taken up any of his/her time.

It is gross, but the kids are 8...Much worse things can go on in 3rd grade classrooms...Please don't set up a conference, email the principal..etc...the teacher is just trying to do her job.

Hi-
As an ex-public school teacher (taught for 15 years), I can honestly say that in the scope of a day, the teacher probably puts teaching a child to cover their mouth while coughing low on her list (really should be a parent taught activity). I found that between disciplining, teaching students at all different levels, meetings, extra duties, paperwork, and worrying about the state tests, teachers are already pulled in too many directions. If you do contact the teacher, I would be "suggestive" and maybe even offer to come teach the class about germs and how to keep them at bay- just an idea. When you come to a problem with a solution, though, it really does help the situation out and it isn't taken so defensively.

Also, as an ex-public school teacher, I have chosen to home school my child because it is our educational system that is lacking and many teachers are struggling with a system that was put in place 100's of years ago. We have advanced so much as a society in many ways, but we still use an educational system that was put into action when people used horses and wagons to get around. Sorry, I'll step off my soap box now.
R. B.

Suggest that you talk to the parent or the school nurse. C.

I think your best avenue is to send him with disinfectant wipes with a note to the teacher that since the children have a hard time remembering to cough into their sleeves (no good just covering a cough with their hands) that you have sent some wipes. The wipes probably won't do a bit of good, but she gets the message without confronting her. The two times I confronted a teacher directly, totally backfired on me. They deserve our applause for they have a hard timeless job, BUT they don't take criticism very well. Also, some of the time the "tattler" gets the punishment, and the "interferring parent" gets a bad rap.

It might work. Hope it goes well and nothing backfires on you.