Hello all. I have a question and I hope some here can help me. It's a long story but I will try to be breif. Back in 1979 my my sister had a baby when she was 13yrs old. My mother and father paid for everything from medical to everything the baby needed. before the baby was even a year my sister ran off with her boyfriend and abandoned her baby leaving my mother and my older sister to raise him. Sometime before he started school my mother could no longer work and my dad retired so my mother was supporting the baby. In order to put him in school she had to be the full lega guardian which my sister so signed away all her rights. My mother passed away in 1994 leaving my nephew which we grew up as bother and sister so since my sister never had custody and did not want custody they handed custody to me. Since moving around I have lost all those papers, but now my Lil bother is lying in the morgue at the age of 32 mind you and the medical examiner will not give the body to my older sister because now my other sister wants to play mommy way to late. The medical examiner is waiting for me to go to New Jersey to claim him because they think I have that paper but I don't. Where do you think I can even get a copy of that it's been over 15yrs? Why are they doing this to her to us? He's an adult who needs to be laid to rest and she is just being plain mean. How can I stop her from medeling? She has no right or even any money for funeral cost. His last wishes are to bury him with his mother. Any help please I leave on 8/12/2010 to Jersey. Should we hire a lawyer?
Wherever you were living when your sister signed over the rights to your mother -contact that courthouse. I would start with the records division -where they keep birth and death records. There is probably somewhere there that has the documents showing that your mother had full custody/guardianship, and now that she's dead, you have it.
Ask someone at the morgue what paper you need and how you can get it. There will be a court record.
Did your mother adopt her grandson or did she become legal guardian? Adoption papers would be on file in the States Bureau of Vital Statistics. Some states allow you to get copies over the Internet. Others require that you get them thru the mail or in person.
When "they" turned over custody to you,how did they do it? Did you adopt or become legal guardian or thru a different legal process? I'm unfamiliar with the process resulting from death. This may have happened because of a will and I don't know how that's handled.
If you don't want to go back there, I suggest that you can obtain copies of legal documents and then send them along with a notarized document giving your other sister the right to obtain the body for you.
The best place to start with this is with the morgue. Ask what they need to release the body. If you don't have those papers when you arrive you'll still have to wait to get them.
I am so sorry that you're having to deal with this. I send my condolences.
Later: Ina G.'s suggestion helped me think of another idea. If you have a report card from his school years that may have you listed as parent/legal guardian and might work.
I think yo may want a lawyer to help speed things up here. Some where the paper had to be signed at a court house. If you know where you lived and that was done at you need to call the court house and tell them what you are looking for and why. They are to keep all of that I would think no matter how long ago it was. If it is like here it is all on their computer systems now. They may be able to send it over the internet to the morgue that holds the body. I hope you are able to work everything out.
if there were papers filed giving you custody of your brother then go to the county office where they were filed and you should be able to get those papers from them even though it has been so long..i am sorry that you are having to go through this...prayers and blessing on the way
One thing you can try...but it's a long shot... contact the school district that he went to school in. If your parents provided some sort of paperwork to enroll him, there might be a slim chance that they still have a copy of it.
The family court in the city you lived in at the time might also be a good place to ask.
Good luck!
