Is Something Wrong with Me?? Help

Possible troll alert!!!

This person has posted several questions about this same subject in the past year. The first one in Jan of 2011. And then was posting about her husband and now it's a boyfriend.

It took us about 7 months the first time and a year and a half the second time. I don't know what to tell you. Sometimes it takes a while.

Well since you have one child, your BF has 2, and you are not married, I'd be relieved that I wasn't pregnant. You need to be more stable first.

A year ago you said you had been trying to get pregnant for four years. Instead of asking us I think you should get a referral to a fertility specialist from your OB/GYN.
As far as judging, I'm biting my tongue...hard.

T.:

I'm going to talk to you like I would my 25 year old daughter. It will be tough love. You might not want to hear it. You probably won't like it. I HOPE that you take the time to read and listen to what I'm saying...

Why are you rushing this?
Why are you NOT married?

Since you say he's your BF - stop trying. Why have a baby with a man who doesn't want to commit to you? He's getting free sex right now and doesn't need to commit to you.

If you are only going to marry to "keep him" well, honey - he isn't "yours".

Your body isn't "working right" because your BODY KNOWS IT ISN'T RIGHT!! That's not judgment - that's fact. You are stressing over getting pregnant and your body is saying NO FREAKING WAY.

You MUST be able to stand on your own two feet and support yourself before you "try to conceive".

You don't "NEED" a man in your life. If you are trying to get pregnant to hold on to him? Another BIG RED FLAG and your body knows it.

So what you need to do is re evaluate where you are in your life.
Do you NEED this man? If you "need" him. He is controlling you. Soon it will be the life of doing something because "Joe wants to do it." and you'll be walking on egg shells.

Do you HAVE to have him to keep a roof over your head? If so - get educated and get help. Get a job that will support you and your family.

Find a therapist who can help you set your priorities - right now it should be your six year old son...not making a new one and being able to stand on your own two feet.

Since you have a son, why not set the right example for him and get married before you have kids with him? Don't have him sleepover until you are married.

When you can stand on your own two feet - and he's still around - then he's in it for the long haul. Great. Get pregnant then. until then? focus on YOU and your son. Not a boy friend.

Don't try to hang onto your bf by having another baby. He may be gung ho right now as he is getting laid a lot with baby making. With his interests lying in his friends more than you, things will be rough in the future if you have another child with things like this. Counseling now... maybe baby later.

I'm not going to bite my tongue. You need to think long and damn hard before you bring a baby into this world under your current situation. That is not fair to the baby, your other child or your bf and his kids. What a freaking hot mess. Get your act together first and then when you are you can consider bringing a child into a stable environment. Good luck, you are so going to need it.

We do not know why you are having trouble getting pregnant. We are not doctors. Do you have a doctor or midwife? This would be the best place to start.

Frequently things in our lives that seem frustrating at the time, turn out for the best in the long run. Perhaps there's a very good reason for this, too. Personally I can think of a few.

Please do not think me unkind. My answer comes from a very caring place.

:(

Maybe if you get married, no offense intended, God will bless your union with the fruit of it's love. Also, NFP works miracles, really.
Blessings,
M.

Well, I'm not a doctor. I'm a man. I know that women ovulate BEFORE their cycle.

I will tell you what I think.

You aren't married. That's what's wrong. We men can be snakes. Anything for a piece of tail. If you were my lady? You wouldn't be put in this situation because I would have put a ring on your finger and set a date. If he won't put a ring on your finger and set a date. Drop him like a hot potato.

This is why I'm scared with my daughters. all the men. I want my girls to grow up to be independent women who don't feel like they need to get pregnant to keep a man. This is what it sounds like to me. A woman trying to hold on to a man.

I second JB and Jane. Sorry be thankful you're not pregnant. Sounds like you have your plate full.

How on earth could people reading this know what is preventing you from conceiving? We aren't doctors and we aren't looking at you or your medical history. If you want to know what's wrong..... try going to the doctor.

For the record, I had one biological child and could never conceive again. Unexplained secondary infertility. Perhaps you have that.

i dont think you need to be legally binded to have a baby although emotionally binded is good. I'm confused though you have past posts of trying to get pregnant with your husband less than a year ago...i guess a lot could change in a year...anywho theres only a 20% chance every month so sometimes it takes a while

btw i hope i didnt come off judging...i agree a lot can change in a year, but i speak from dating after divroce (i live with my bf and have been apart from my ex for almost 2 1/2 years) that if you went from with your husband to with a new guy and trying to have a baby in a year thas a lot fo change for your son, but only you know whats good fot him. Even with a 2 1/2 year gap between my ex and living with my bf there were still a lot of changes for my daughter. I don't think time together matters as much as if you've had a chance to heal from your ex. I still am in ways...oh and you ovulate after your period....goodluck and I hope you get the baby of your families dreams

"...and always let your conscience be your guide..."

I suggest reading the book , Take Charge of your Fertility. it will answer all your questions as to best time conceive, how or IF you actually ovulate (you won't know for sure UNLESS you take your temp each month and see a pattern does) just because a woman has a period, believe it or not, it doesn't mean you have ovulated.. The book is packed full of good info.. for those wanting to get pregnant or not..

good luck

You've only been trying for a few months. Be patient. And try buying one of those ovulation predictors next to the pregnancy tests at Walgreens. If you still don't have any success in the next few months, go see your ob/gyn for a check up and some advice. Hugs and good luck to you!

You'll need to keep track of your periods to figure out your fertile time of the month. If you're ovulating normally there should be like a 3 day period out of the whole month where you'll be able to possibly conceive. A basic Google search will help you figure out your fertile times.

Typically you ovulate 14 days after your period so that's the time to do it! There's a very short window of time you can get pregnant. I think its 1 or 2 days during that time. I would try that. Otherwise go to the obgyn and ask them. I found out I had a thyroid problem and that's why I couldnt concieve. The doc put me on thyroid meds and a pill called clomid. I got pregnant 2 months after that. Good luck!

If you have been on birth control for a long time it can take your body a while to get it out of your system. It took me almost a year with my second because I had been on birth control for 5 years after my first.

And as for the " you are not married" crew- I have been with the guy I call my husband for 20 years we have never been "married" we have two kids a house two dogs joint checking accounts and are for the most part happy- if you are committed you are "married". Give the conceiving a few months if it doesn't work then make an appointment.
Good luck

A doctor would say it's only considered a fertility problem if you have been trying consistently for a year to get pregnant with no success. In the meantime, there are many behavioral and lifestyle issues that can impact your fertility such as stress, poor diet, obesity (not saying anything personal; I don't know you. But weight can be an issue. Actually underweight women can have trouble getting pregnant as well), etc.. There are also a lot of common health problems that can interfere with fertility. If you think there's something wrong with you physically, go to a doctor, have your hormone levels checked and get a physical. Consider improving your diet, exercising, and making other changes to be healthier physically and mentally. All of these things make a difference when you're trying to conceive.

Buy some ovulation tests on http://www.early-pregnancy-tests.com/ They are super cheap. You'll know exactly when to conceive. I have 2 kids to show for it. And both kids took more than four months. It's a waiting game but when the test is positive, you are good to go. Good luck.

In response to when you ovulate... here's the basics..... at some point, your body starts to prepare the uterus for implantation by thickening the lining of the uterus. About 2 weeks before you start your menstrual flow, you ovulate.

If the egg doesn't get fertilized, the lining of the uterus sheds (this is the menstrual flow). The unfertilized ovum (egg) flows out of the uterus with the menstrual fluid.

http://www.womenshealth.gov/publications/our-publications...

This link can explain more about the menstrual cycle.

Your body then takes a break of a few days, and then starts the cycle over again, with the lining of the uterus thickening to prepare for implantation.

Three or four months is nothing for trying to get pregnant. Wedmd.com has some good information on fertility and basic info. http://www.webmd.com/baby/guide/getting-pregnant

you sound so stressed out about it all. That kind of stress alone makes it hard