Legal Counsel for Visiting Bullying Sibling

Wow! How about therapy?? Has that been brought up or done yet? I am afraid that by putting a restraining order on your step-child you are just going to add to the anger that is already obvious. You didn't say anything about the father's opinion, does he feel a restraining order is needed?

There is always a lot of anger in a divorce and new family situation but I'm just afraid if you go after a fly with an elephant gun you could be adding more problems as time goes on.

Good luck and find some family therapy.

L.

Why legal help? You should be looking for good psychological care for this child! I certainly understand you need to protect your 3 year-old, but what about some compassion for the older child. He is obviously hurting and in need of intervention. An attorney is just going to be hurtful to him and anger his mother, in my opinion.

First, where is your husband in this? These are both his children and this is his problem.

I sympathize with your frustration and anxiety. But this child is still a child and needs to be parented by his parents. He needs help and I agree that he needs to be seen by a mental-health professional. I agree with the suggestion for family therapy. It sounds like all of the adults need help coming up with better ways to divide responsibilities, make decisions, and cope. The bio-parents only have a couple of years left where they have complete influence over his life, and they need to take this opportunity to get him the resources he needs. I admire that you're trying, but this isn't really your job to do.

I don't understand why you want a restraining order - wouldn't it make sense to change the custody arrangement first? Maybe even temporarily, for the summer?

Yes, there are agencies that handle Order of Protections. However, I'm not sure whether that will work if your husband still WANTS to have visitations with his son in the same home. If your husband has legal authority to make certain legal/educational/residential decisions for his 16 year old (he may not based on the custody agreement), it may be best for him to connect with the school to determine whether his son and/or the family needs counseling/anger management - or discuss with your husband whether he still wants to continue the visits in the home (and if he does want to change and/or limit the visitation schedule, that may be an issue that has to go back to court depending on how it was arranged initially). I know this is a tough decision and I'm sorry for you. I don't know all the facts, but it may be best to try to handle it without involving the law.