Logistics of Splitting up a Household

My ex & I were together for 11 years. We went through all the stuff together & decided who got what. It was actually the easiest part of the whole thing.

Not a child of divorce, or a divorcee, so my input might be a bit misguided, nonetheless here's a consideration. Have you made decisions re: whether either of you are going to stay in your current home? Also, have you made decision re: custody?

I don't know how much stock a kid puts in a familiar sofa, but suppose dad decides to take it, you buy a replacement, it doesn't fit in dad's place, and the sofa goes to the curb, might upset a kid. Just saying, the stuff that might mean something to the kids should be thought about too.

Good luck to you and yours,
F. B.

I made a list and put the stuff he liked better on one side and the stuff I liked better on the other and it came out pretty even. We didn't assign a value to any of it but I did have to pay him half to keep my grand piano.

I got the living and dining room furniture, including antiques handed down from my family. He got the family room furniture with the big screen TV and all the electronics. That way we each got a set of stuff that matched.

He got the master bedroom furniture, I kept the kids furniture. He got his office, I got mine. He got the corelle, I got the dinnerware and we split the art plates that our kids had made over the years. We had 2 sets of silverware and plenty of pots and pans to split.

We were both happy with the list. Then, when it came time to pick his stuff up, my ex wanted more. I just said, "Nah".

It was the easiest part of the divorce.

This was the easiest part of our reeeeeally ugly divorce.

He got his stuff (about 30k)
I got mine (about $800)

I got most of our joint property (furniture, etc...about 10k)

The remainder? ($balance) was deducted from his share of the house (which I got).

After adding in 20k in personal assets (30-10 from furniture), his car (4x more expensive than mine), money spent on him during the marriage (college, music, etc... And this only came up because of the HUGE disparity... Legally speaking the slang is "I flipped burgers to get you through medschool")...

I got the house free & clear, and 2 years of "reparative" maintenance.

We didn't list everything. We just basically knew what was his/mine/ours. We assigned value to his list, my list, and our list in a general sense. In our case, clothes entered in... As he had about 10k in clothes, and I had $200. For a lot of people whose closets are roughly equal, that doesn't get listed. For people whose cars are roughly equal, ditto.

One thing to keep in mind: gifts do NOT count. He had another 10k in gifts (Xmas, bdays, etc.) that were NOT counted, even though they were bought with family money. Ditto engagement rings, etc. if its a gift, it doesn't go on the balance sheet.

Mine left with basically what he came with...a couple boxes of clothes and a tv. lol But we had a 3000 sf house so I did give him one complete livingroom set, some dishes and cookware and that really is it. Each of our cars were paid off so we just kept each of ours and we each had a credit card that had about 8k on it. I kept the house because it was in my name but we owed more than it was worth so I ended up doing a short sale. I think you just have to sit down and go thru all of it and ask him what he wants. If he's cool about it, he may not nickel and dime you to death. Good luck.

When my ex-husband and I split we met one day at the house with no one else there and just went room by room, item by item. It was actually very easy at that point. With most of the items we agreed easily who it meant most for. There were a handful of things that we disagreed on, and with two of them sold them and split the profit (one was an oak buffet we had purchased, the other was the computer). The other two, I kept one and he kept the other.
Good luck.

When I left my ex-husband - we went through the house - room by room - and decided who wanted what.

Anything I came into the marriage with - I kept. Same with him.

We were funky - we had had two selections for china - he kept the one he liked, I kept the one I liked.

Dishes - pots and pans in general - like I said in another post - I went and put new stuff on lay away and had all new stuff at my new place. Same with towels, sheets, etc.

Cars - each had our own. Just transferred titles to respective names only.

assets? we each had our own - kept all the same. checking account was split 50/50...savings same.

I let him keep the couch as it was too big for my new place (regrets this one!!) LOVED that couch. I didn't want the water bed - and had already purchased a new bed....

just figure out what you want and what you NEED. You will find that you don't need as much as you thought you did. You might be selling a lot of stuff or donating it!!

Good luck!

All property is current value, not replacement cost - meaning a 5 year old sofa isn't worth a lot, but it is to replace it.
Whatever you came into the marriage with or were gifted by family should be yours and not considered as part of your community property. If you inherited your grandmother's buffet, it's yours and he doesn't get it or half of the current value of it. Also, remember to look at the value of tools, lawnmowers and other things in the garage.

For me, I kept the living room furniture and my ex got the furniture from the family room - his choice. Our bedroom set was from an inheritance and other furniture had little value. I kept the majority of household items with the house to keep it consistent for the kids and he got all the toys like the fishing boat, canoe, 4-wheeler, etc.

I kept anything that was mine before we became a couple. Anything that we acquired together, except the house and car, I gave him dibs on. But that's just me.
The house we bought together just before we got married, but the mortgage was in my name. The car and insurance were also in my name, and with his history of driving drunk, I wasn't going to let him have it.