Moms W/common Situation...

Billijo,
I have an alternative suggestion, Chinese Medicine looks at kids diffently. Kids are placed into 5 basic catagories or a combination of the 5. These catagories work with the 5 Elements (Wind, Water, ect.) After understanding where a child is at you can understand where there strengths and challenges are. This can help you understand how to channel their energy! If you would like more information let me know.
-Dr. Heather

my five year old is kind of the same way try evalutaing her for sensory sensitivity. it is not something they always look for immediately but it is not as bad as adhd it can be managed without meds. it will be a lot easier to understand her and help her when they diagnose her with something... she may also be hyperactive. good luck

The school should be doing more than just complaining about the situation. They should be putting behavior modification plans (for example, a reward system for good behvior) in place. If they think it is ADHD, they can provide services to more adequately diagnosis this (school psychologist observation in the room, parent/teacher surveys). The result may be an IEP plan (Individualized Education Plan), which lays out the special needs the school needs to address. I was told by my son's school that they have a lot of ADHD kids that just have IEPs and are NOT on medication. Don't be afraid to look into this more because you will be pushed into medication. Being educated about the problem can help you look for other solutions as well. (Others mentioned non-medical solutions - we read the book "Is this Your Child" by Doris Rapp, and have seen some improvements with a modified diet). Good luck!

Hi, Billijo,
You sent this piece in a long time ago, but I only just came across it. How are you doing with your daughter? I feel as though I'm in the same boat with my son. I feel your pain - would love to know if you have had any progress.

I have some very strong feelings on this issue. First, any teacher that would continue to push the issue with you on a daily bases is not being respectful. Schools and some of the teachers who work in them are more interested in having an easy day that getting the children what they need. The drugs that they put children on for "ADHD" are not good for developing brains.
I would say that your first course of actions should be to revise your daughters diet (and stop letting her eat cafeteria food at school - the stuff that they serve there isn't nutritional). You could try elimination diets (where you take your child off a certian substance too see if her sympthoms improve). ADHD sympthoms (as well as PPD and other autistic spectrum disorders) can be alleviated by eliminating things like refined sugars and high fructose corn syrup (this stuff is horribly nasty and is also in just about everything these days) and gluten. There are other food sources, but none come to mind at this exact moment. Secondly, Get the book Smart Medicine for a Heathlier Child by Janet Zand, Rachel Walton and Bob Rountree. It's a great book with a section on Hiperactivity. Do lots of research (not just from this book).

Also, I just want to mention that when I was a kid, the schools and doctors tried to tell my mother that I had ADHD, and wanted very much for her to put me on medication for it. She flat out refused. I couldn't sit still in class, couldn't pay attention, had very poor self control skills, I had difficulty making/keeping friends - all of the earmarks of ADHD. I too, could be extremely affectionate. Today I'm fine. My biggest downfall is that I struggle with trying to be organized. Could this be a symptom of adult "ADHD" or "ADD"? Sure, It could be. But there's no way on earth I will start popping pills for it because I don't believe that's the answer to the problem. There's no magic pill.

I've gone to college, gotten married, had children of my own (neither of which are showings symptoms of ADHD). I, as an adult knowing full well how difficult I was to handle, am so glad that my mother refused to put me on medication. I learned to deal with my problems. I learned to control my self and I learned how to demonstrate socially acceptable behaviors and eventually made some friends that I've kept through the years. By the time I hit college, I was able to concentrate and study and did fairly well studying law. I became a paralegal and loved the job. Now I'm a daycare provider and home childcare advocate. I also homeschool my own children (maybe this is an avenue for you to explore?)

Don't let them convince you that your child will not lead a successful life if you don't drug her up now so that they can "teach" her. Follow your heart, trust yourself and your daughter. I'm willing to bet that she'll be fine.

I have a child who is "overactive", being hyper or being a handful is not reason enough to throw the ADHD label at. My son is three and will be starting preschool in September, and I am also worried they will try to misdiagnose him. My sister was labled with the same thing, and the school would let her attend school until my mother had her put on medication. She would only take it monday thru friday and only during school hours, so when she would come home from school, weekends, and long breaks she was completely out of control for my mother. I think the medication only made her worse. We want out children to grow up knowing that they can do anything in the world, that is also what teachers are suppose to be telling the students, we shouldn't be making our children feel like there is something wrong with them, this is the way God made them. When you have other children, and you are a single parent, it can make the oldest feel sort of left out. Maybe you could get her into a big brother big sister program, it really helps much more than the medications. Maybe she just needs someone outside of the home and school to talk to.

Hi,

I'm very new to this, but I have a 5 year old that they say the same thing about. I too am refusing to just "label" her with it because i dont want her to have to be on medication as well. It's not something I strongly believe in, "drugging" them up. My grandmother mailed me an article not to long ago about ADHD and in it said that karate is suppose to be a good "medicine" for children who are believed to have ADHD because it provides a sort of discipline for them and keeps the hyperactivity to a minimum because they are using so much energy. I enrolled my daughter in karate not too long ago to see if it helps a little.
Just a suggestion...

Hi Billijo~ I guess there is a few things I would do to organize myself in order to make a solid decision about what direction I wanted to go in. first, I would educate myself about adhd and then I would compare what the teacher is reporting against the symptoms. then I would list any concerns that I have with the child's behavior at home. i do believe there are check lists that are available in regards to behaviors associated with adhd. I would also request a committee on special education evaluation for your child to make sure there are no deficits that are causing frustration and contributing to your child's inability to complete what is being asked. this eval will also evaluate to see if your child is in the right classroom setting. Having done all of this, then you can decide if you want to persue an evaluation. I know there are a lot of therapists out there who are willing to work with families to do behavior modification and don't push medications, that should be your last resort. Unfortunately, labeling your child seems to be the only way to get services these days. I hope this was helpful.

Billijo,

It sounds like a lot of people are passing judgement and giving opinions, but none of the ones you mentioned are doctors. Have you taken your concerns to Kaylei's pediatrician? They can give you some guidance on what you are looking for, and a path to follow in terms of testing and evaluations to find out just what you are dealing with. Kids who have behavioral troubles in class have a huge range of causes why, from true ADHD to learning delays, even hearing or vision problems can cause a child to get bored or frustrated and act out in school.

going to see a doctor does not mean that you HAVE to do anything they tell you, including drugs. If you see a doctor who pushes medicating her, get a second opinion, talk to a nutritional expert, there are a lot of things that can be done before you have to go down that road. Keep in mind that sometimes the docs are right, and sometimes the medication is both necessary and effective. Just because something is over-diagnosed doesn't mean it's not correct in some cases.

Good luck, and if you are really concerned about the school situation, see if you can have her moved to another teacher. Sometimes a fresh set of eyes can be helpful.

Jess