My 2-Yr Old Very Unhappy in Daycare, Any Advice?

If you can stay home even if it is by getting rid of a car or some bills, please do. I worked at a daycare and I know how bad it is for the kids. Yes, some of them only cry for a few minutes by why let them cry at all.
I am a working mom so I know that sometimes you have to do it.

I use to be a preschool/daycare teacher. I am now a stay at home mom. I say first you are the only one that knows your child and what the signs are. Second how do you feel when you are there. Third POP IN! I have had many children cry to give the guilt or didn't like the change but after time they were all over the place. Don't tell the daycare you are popping in just do it. Forth infom the daycare you want the quick goodbye it is SOOO hard to do but it is the best TRUST ME I have done it for 12 years. You hug, kiss tell her you love her and hand her off and go for the door. Once you are outside cry if you need it. All teachers and other moms will understand we have all been there. Soon you will have the time to talk to the teacher and your little one will give you the tour of the room and then it comes to when she will not want to leave! Good luck!

I totally agree with most of the other mothers...drop into the daycare and check on her. Drop in at different times of the day too. It took my 2 yr. old some time to adjust to daycare, particularly because she had always been home with me all the time. However, after several visits, I noticed that she wasn't engaged enough after I left her and she felt lost because the teachers didn't redirect her towards fun things like toys. After mentioning it to the teacher, whenever I would drop my daughter off, they would take her over to the toys and sit with her for a few minutes and she became more comfortable with them and gradually things got better. Talk with your daughter's teacher too. She may be able to help with your daughter's transition as well as tell you when are the most difficult times during the day and you both can try different ways to ease your daughter's anxiety and eventually yours too.

Dear A. V,

My twins were 3 when I started daycare for them. It was really hard on them and me. Give it a few weeks. Speak with the daycare teacher and have her give your daughter extra attention during this transition. Ask her to have your daughter tell her things she loves to do there. Make a project, paint, play with dolls, draw pictures for the refrigerator,etc.

This is all new for everyone. Give it a few weeks.

I promise your daughter will be happy in no time.

I beleive in a good day care. It's the best thing for kids learning to be with other kids and growing mentally and maturing.

Keep me posted.

G. H.

Hi there, oh I feel for you! ;-) Please hang in there, it will work itself out in time. Really! It's very normal for children that age to feel separation anxiety. Some children take longer than others to adjust. Reassure her that you will be back to pick her up. Talk to the caregivers about her individual situation, so they can her with her own personal needs like the other post suggested. Some people believe a mid-day parental visit helps others think it makes a bad situation worse. Talk to the caregivers about that. I had a friend that was allowed to call not visit her son once a day for a few days through the adjustment period. In the long run it's very important for her development and social skills to be with other children and adults. It will work itself out. Hang in there!

It's hard for children to adjust. Change is not normal for anyone to have to get used to. It took my daughter a couple of months to get used to her new preschool. She never wanted to go and would say that she was sick. But you have to keep on taking her. Do you know any of the parents there? That might help you. Just keep talking to the teacher(s) as well. They are your best friends because they do this every day all year long. I know it's hard to see your kid so upset, but it will get better. Oh, try and get her involved in some other things that would help to build her social skills: church, gymnastics, a nice park (it's harder when they are younger).

My son was really bad when he started daycare. He cried and cried. The only way he would stop is if one of the teachers would hold him. He had a lot of transitions up until the point of daycare and he was used to only mommy, daddy, or grandma so it was a big adjustment for him. Give it some time she'll adjust. If she has a luvvy (blanket, stuffed animal, etc) if she could take that it might help. Also a friend made a little wallet photo album that her daughter could take to school with her and look at pictures of friends and family. That worked pretty good too.

Good Luck!

Oh A.

This brings back such memories! We went through the same thing, for about a week. Mondays were a little harder because of the weekend, but it will get easier. She'll adjust probably faster than you will.
It took our DS about a week to get "used" to daycare, and by a month's time, he was running in the front door and barely saying good-bye.

I hope this helps!

L.

Are YOU happy with the daycare, with everything you see? Are you confident that things are 'well' after you leave her there? I know children do need to adjust to something new like that, but please go with your gut feeling if you even think something might not be right. My children started daycare young, and the place I have them at (they knew I was terribly upset leaving my munchkins) not only called me to assure me the kids were fine, but they emailed me pictures mid-day to let me see my munchkins were fine. They also told me if I ever needed to, they have cameras in every room, and I could come into their office to watch my kids in action in the room. All of that definitely eased my mind. Good luck!

Give a little bit longer she has to get used to the environment. It will all work out