Naughty Words

I think that even though you aren't making a big deal about it he knows it bothers you. I would suggest saying something like "what did you say...oh you mean muck; muck, muck, muck" and then correct with muck and from time to time ignore him saying the F word to see if he gives it up. There is an age where labeling anything as “naughty” makes those things more appealing even if you don't make a deal of it.

At his age, ignoring it is the best way to go. If that doesn't work, try the word replacement. No offense to a previous responder, but I can't quite imagine that a 2-year-old would respond to a threat to wash his mouth out with soap! (And who would do that? Yikes!) In my experience, with naughty words or any other "naughty" behavior (like telling me "I hate you" when not getting her way), the sooner and more completely I ignore it, the sooner it stops. No reaction = no fun!

My son started saying the S word after hearing it. We tried not making a big deal about it. Then my husband started telling him that he wasn't saying the word right, it is pronounced Ship not S***. After a couple of corrections, he stopped using the word. Not sure if it could work for you but maybe tell him it is Fun, or duck not F***. Sounds kind of silly when I write it down, but it did work. Good luck!

Years aga my friend and I had the same problem with our 3 kids, her 2 sons were 3 years apart and my daughter was right in the middle, I don't remember how old they were at the time. I remembered what someone had told me and we told them those were "bathroom words". Not forbidden, but only for use in the bathroom. Then we trouped them all into the bathroom and told them go ahead. They started saying them, shouting them, repeating each other, anything they could think of. From S*** to Poo Poo Head. They kept it up laughing and giggling for a while and then they were done. If my daughter used the words after that, I didn't hear them. And I never heard my friend say it didn't work. Although don't worry if you have to do it a couple times, or just remind him it is a bathroom word.

I got my baby to stop saying the s-word by waiting until he said it again at home, and then stopping what I was doing, rushing over to him and holding his hands and saying "Look at Mommy. Its not a nice word I dont like that word. Dont say that word again"

He was surprised by my reaction and never said the word again.

Ignore it and he'll stop.

The best thing is word replacement.. Like for instance, F'ing A'hole Excuse my example, but it can be Funny rascal!! Just do it that way and turn it around on him to make him say your word, don't even bother with telling him the word is naughty, he could care less at 2! Good luck..

We did the same thing, my son was 18 months at the time when he came home with saying a bad word and we simply just said "Let's say it together, this is how you say it" of course changing the word and it stopped, before it got worse.

Hi Krystal, Sometimes I feel parents under estimate the intelligence of a child. If he picked up this word that quickly he is smart enough to understand that you do not tolerate that language in your home. We can't shelter children from all the bad words, since they are everywhere. We can teach them that you do not except that kind of language and therefore there are consequences if he continues. I always explain to them that even though they will hear it that does not mean they can repeat it and give them several warnings of what will happen if I hear it again. As parents we need to make sure we tell the kids what we expect and at least for me ignoring it does not teach the kids that it is bad. Once I reach my limit of warning I did the hot sauce on the tongue and once I did the soap for talking back (before I get hate mail it was just the shock and going through on what I had warned him I was going to do if he did it again...and I let him wash out his mouth right away but said that if it continued I might not be that nice and will not let him wash out his mouth...for him it was making an impression that I would not take his behavior and I do what I say) What ever you do or try just stick to it. I have two wonderful boys ages 10 and 5 and have not had any more issues about bad words or even talking back and now I don't have to shelter them from the "bad" words because I know they will not repeat them. Good Luck

He's only 2 years old and does not "abstractly" understand why this word is so naughty much less what it means. It's more like an entertaining word at this age.

Lots of kids go through this... before you know it, the "phase" will pass. What we did with our kids, is just ignore it... and then as quickly as it started, it stopped. Don't react to it when he says it... just distract him. Or simply say "Mommy's ears don't work when you say that word...I can't hear you..."

Mostly, yes, they say it to get a reaction out of you. But it will pass before you now it. At the 2's age... lots of "phases" to come!

take care,
~Susan

Hi Krystal:
Two year olds are ancious,and eager to learn. Their brains like little sponges. Soaking up everything,and anything, that they think may (IMPRESS)Their number one fans( Their parents)Toddlers,are not brillant enough to distinguish between good or bad words.They simply are good at aping what they hear.They Look up to you, to guide them.You are their teacher.The reason your son repeats the word,is because he recieves a reaction from you each time he repeats it.Its really quite simple. No reaction,no attention,It doesn't benift or give him the response he is seeking from you.Hot sauce and soap in the mouth for any child, in my opinion is sadistic behavior.It's primitive, displays calus,and a lack for compassion. Your child would resent you for the cruel treatment,and he will believe this sort of behavior exceptable,and treat others this same way,as he grows.I would ignore it,and he will refrain,when he sees it doesn't gain him attention.It will soon stop.Draw his attentions to something else.He will soon forget he ever heard the word.I wish you and your darlin son the best.

There is nothing like trying to instill your values in your children at a young age. I would let him know you do not like those words, but then leave it alone. One reminder per situation, but with his attention. If you give it too much attention, he will of course have some fun with you.

Of course, it won't be easy.

Hi,

I am a mom of five children from ages 10-21. I have a one word solution for you. VINEGAR!

It only takes one drop. When your child repeats this word, don't become visibly upset or worried. Just very calmly go to the cabinet and get out the vinegar and place a drop on his toungue, followed by sitting in the corner for 2 minutes, ( or however old you child is ). This is a very simple "every action has a related reward/consequence" technique. My oldest son is in the Navy and I'm sure he has occations when he talks like a sailor, but he is always a perfect gentleman in my front of me.

PS This works great for a biter as well. Also, a spray bottle works great.

M. G...

We taught our kids that words like that hurt people's feeling and makes them sad so we don't say them so that we don't hurt people's feelings. We never used discriptions like "naughty" or anything like that because it never made since to them how a word could be "naughty". As soon as we started using the explanation that some people's feelings are hurt and they get sad when you use those words we never had a problem with it. They know more then their share of swear words, you can't help the exposure. But they are very good about never using them and even pointing it out to my husband and myself when we let one slip.

Hi Krystal!

Stacy V's idea was great, using word replacement will help some. Below is a link to a video with a mom that uses that technique. The F word would be a lot harder to replace than other words. Good luck, this too shall pass...

http://youtube.com/watch?v=VVn27YXEWho&feature=related

M

It sounds like you have received alot of advice. I'm not sure of the age of your son, but here is something that has worked with my kids. When they have said I word that I do not approve of, I simply tell them that is a "potty word", and if they want to say that word they can go into the potty room or bathroom and say it there--where it belongs. I try not to react too much, but just give them their choice, and so far the fun of saying bad words looses its appeal when they know that they have to sit in the bathroom (without an audience). And they know if they say a bad word, they will be sent to the bathroom for at least 5 minutes as well. We have even had friends come over and say things like "poop poop head",etc. and my kids have told them that if they say that they will have to go to the bathroom. They would looked at me, I would just smile and nod my head, and then it has stopped. Of course with those 4 letter words there should be further explanation of why we don't say them, but I would say wait until after the thrill of saying them has been squelched. Good luck.

I do word replacement too, by my Daughter is 3.5, she doenst know what the bad words are yet, she just repeats words like stupid, or ugly etc. If your son is old enough to know that he is saying a bad word, replacing it will not work. If all else fails tell him you will wash his mouth out with soap.

My two year old son says the s word, i tell him insteed of saying that how about we say, shoot, and it works he dousnt say it he says shoot ..but he also says the c..o..c..k word but he is trying to say clock, he loves clocks...we can be anywhere and he will say wow big c, daddy s big c, mommy thats a big c, i want to see the c, yeah talk about embarrising at the moment we have delayed the attendance of our church because of it so good luck to you and god bless

The same thing happened to my son and me. He was 3 at the time, though. We were at Staples, and one of the employees there said it to a fellow employee while we were standing at the checkout. It's funny because as soon as he said it, without a beat, I blurted out "Watch the mouth!". He was so embarrassed. But given your situation, since these kids weren't at worked, the outcome, I'm sure would not have been the same!

At any rate, my son said the infamous word in the parking lot and when we got home. I explained that this is a word that is not said and isn't tolerated. He said it again, and I just got up and left the room. He said it again while we were playing together, and I again just got up and left the room without saying anything. I came back later and he asked me where I went. I said I left because I didn't like being around him when he speaks 'like that'. He has only said it 2 more times since, and each time I just left (and made sure he saw me do it). Then he forgot about it.

Good luck! I think your approach will work! I would also make sure any other caregivers act consistently with your approach, too. Give it a little time. I'm sure he'll forget, too!

Krystal as a mother of 3 and a kindergarten teacher for 13 years, I understand your problem. While its too late to do anything about it now, I would recommend in the future that you point out to the teenagers that there are younger children present, etc. I usually look at them and while gesturing to my child say "nice mouth!" not too nicely either. I understand that some people arent comfortable speaking out to other peoples children/teenagers, however if your child sees that he is not the only one being scolded for using this language, he'll understand it a little more.

When my children have said bad words, I have told them in a stern voice that we don't say those words, even if others do. And then if they keep repeating the words I will give them hotsauce. I just put a little on my finger and put it on their tongue. If your kids like hotsauce this wouldn't work, but mine hate it so it works for me.