Need a Good Way to Say Thanks

Updated on February 09, 2008
M.R. asks from Fort Collins, CO
14 answers

I am almost done with nearly 12 weeks of bedrest with my second pregnancy. My daughter is 2.5 years old and this (strict) bedrest would absolutely NOT have been possible without the assistance of my mother in law who has kept our house, made meals and most importantly, taken care of our daughter while my husband was at work. She lives about 45 minutes away so she has just lived here during the week while hubby is working. Often I think about how women without this kind of amazing support would be forced to choose between the health of the unborn child and taking care of the older child and am so grateful I could do what was best for the baby without worrying about my daughter. My request is for inexpensive (we are BROKE after all the medical bills and me not working) way to show our massive appreciation and thanks to my mother in law (and father in law who has lived without her and helped some too). Somehow taking them out to dinner, having them over for dinner or buying something for them doesn't seem adequate...Any ideas are welcome! Thank you.

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P.T.

answers from Phoenix on

If it's an option, you could consider naming the baby after her. I gave both of my children a family name for their middle name.
But the best way to thank her, is just by letting her know how much you appreciate and love her.

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N.R.

answers from Phoenix on

BRAG! Don't wait start now. Bragging is free and can go on and on, Post your thanks in her church bulletin (mostly free and you don't have to join) for your prayer being answered by her being the MIL you have always wanted.

In a month do it in the local rag as well as local newspaper. Her friends read the obits, they read the notices. Let everyone know you have the best MIL in the world. Brag Loud!

Tell every single one of her friends she is generous with her time, you feel so loved and pampered, she treats you like one born into the family. Tell people how great your MIL is, chances are she doesn't know it. Women rarely know how cool they are.

1 mom found this helpful
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H.D.

answers from St. Cloud on

Have you heard of Once Upon a Family? One of my favorite things is their Family Tree Poster. I gave it as a gift to several family members at Christmas and it was GORGEOUS. You could put family info and pictures on the leaves, and then when the new baby arrives, she can add the info of the healthy new family member that she helped to make possible. I framed the ones that I did in a 18x24 frame. You can check it out under products, Staying in Touch at www.traditionsconsultant.com . It is $32 plus shipping and handling via FedEx. It would be a nice project for you to work on while on bedrest to give you something to do!

Good luck with everything!!!

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J.M.

answers from Denver on

Wow...what a special woman. You are so lucky to have you in your life. Do you have other friends and family near? What about a potluck dinner in her honor? It can be a party, you can send out cheap invites and have everyone bring something. When they rsvp (if they do) assign everyone something like dessert, wine, meat dish, salad, etc. Have music, and maybe a few signs or something? An event like that wouldn't cost too much and you could make a speech before dinner or something. I know that would really touch her heart.

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K.

answers from Phoenix on

Obviously a nice dinner out would be a nice gesture, but maybe the best way to thank them is to just keep them involved in your children's lives, they obviously care for them or wouldn't be helping and the children will also benefit from having their grandparents involved in their lives. It also is cheap! Good luck!

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J.C.

answers from Phoenix on

We like to write books and poems for those we love and express our appreciation that way. Words always speak the loudest. One idea that I was thinking of was to buy an empty storybook. You can buy them at Lakeshore Learning Store or I am sure other learning stores or online. You could make the 'story' be from your children and express all the things that your daughter has enjoyed doing with grandma and all that the new baby will enjoy. For example, "My grandma is so special, she always makes me laugh, I love it when she reads to me and holds me in her lap." She holds me oh so gently and hums a little song, I especially enjoy that I don't do anything wrong. She makes me cookies and gives me milk...etc. etc. etc.

The best of luck to you and your family!

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V.M.

answers from Phoenix on

M.,
Go to www.IwantYouToKnowMe.com and purchase a Grandma book for your mother in law. They are only $15. This is a perfect way to say thank you and that she is one very important person in your children's lives. Once she fills it out, it is kept for your children as they grow older. All eight books in the series are great, including one for you and your husband, the Mom & Dad, but the Grandma one is really special and is a much better gift that just more stuff.

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L.P.

answers from Denver on

A couple of other suggestions. Framed photos of your daughter and the baby. Portrait Innovations some times has a great $9.95 deal or just blow up your own photos. Also, Costco and some of the photo sites do great photo calendars.... 12 photos and you can personalize the calendar with birthdays etc. And only about $10, but a year of great pictures. We do this for aunts and uncles for Christmas every year and they rave about it! Or have your daughter draw/paint something special for grandma and frame that for her. We are very lucky, like you to have a special grandparent! And we definitely need to appreciate and honor them!

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S.W.

answers from Las Vegas on

As a mother of 5 and grandma to 2 (and another one on the way) we love to feel appreciated for all the things we do by a simple thank you, a phone call,a special card or letter expressing your gratitude. I would bet that your wonderful mother-in-law does not want anything else in return. Sometimes letting a person provide service and love to you is all that is required. The bond that will grow between you because of this experience is more important than any gift you could buy her.

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S.H.

answers from Denver on

I had a similar situation and totally understand where you are coming from! Can you get ahold of pictures of her mother and grandmother? I did a 5 generation picture collage for my Mother in Law after the baby was born and she thought that was the most amazing gift ever. With MIL's like them its more about the thought than it is about the expense. Does she attend church? You could send a public thanks to be read in front of the congregation as well. Make a big poster to hang on your door at the hospital thanking her. Have your daughter paint her hands and put them all over it thanking her Nana (or whatever she is called) for helping mommy bring her brother/sister into the world. That way everyone that passes by your door will know how great she is. Don't gorget the sacrifices that Grandpa has made living without her for these 12 weeks as well!! :) Feel free to contact me if you need a bedrest buddy! The last few weeks can be a blessing and a curse! It definitely tests your sanity! I was on bedrest from week 15 to week 36 when I delivered...so I know!! :)

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C.S.

answers from Las Vegas on

Oh name the baby after her! Both my girls are kind of named after my mother but my 2 YO is named after both my mother and MIL and my MIL cried when we told her the babies name.

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K.D.

answers from Denver on

My husband treated me to a couples massage at the Woodhouse Spa in Denver and it was great! I don't remember how much it was, but you can check them out on the web. www.denver.woodhousespas.com I know he had saved for a while for the treat, so it may be a bit out of your range right now. If you can do it, though, I'm sure they would love it. And you M-i-L would love the relaxation after caring for a 2 yo! You're so fortunate to have such great in-laws. Enjoy that close family and the new baby!

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D.K.

answers from Denver on

Maybe give her a gift certificate to a nearby spa and let her be queen for the day there even including a nice dinner. I am sure just you and your husband sitting her down with a heartfelt "we could not have done this without you" is enough as she sounds like a truly wonderful person. Or is there something she likes, hobby? If so a nice gift certificate with a really great thank you card, flowers would be nice.
You sound very lucky and congrats on the soon to be arrival

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J.J.

answers from Phoenix on

and it thought i was the only one witha good mother in law! how about a cupon book. you can make a nice one up or jsut use pretty pices of paper in a nice vase and put things like. ( of course affter the baby is born and you can do this), backrub, foot rub, pedicure, manicure, cook a candle light dinner for her and her husband at their home then leave. take her to lunch or a pcinck jsut the two of you. some of the cupons can be inspirational messages thanking her. and yea brag. or you could take out an ad in the local newspaper thanking her for all she has done. go to your local high school and see if you can get their choral group to do a special program fo r her and her husband some evening. or maybe a church choir. make her a cake. treat her to a haircut. a gift basket with bubble bath a bottle of wine and candles. my nother in law loves t shirts and sweat tops . you can make one with a picture of the kids or family on our computer. i bought t shirt transfer paper at walmart and printed a picture form my computer and ironed it on and also used letters printed from the computer to write "wrestlersgrandma" on a sweat top for when she comes to see my son's state wrestling meet. i know whe will love it and wear it to work on casual fridays so she can brag. i als omade one where i sewed clear plastic ( like the kind you put on picnic tables) cut into picture size squares. i sued a zig zag stitch and then embelioshed it with fabric paints. i left one side open so she could insert grandkid pictures. she can take them out before wahsing and she can also change the pictures.

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