Need Advice/opinions About Working

SOMEbody needs to get a fulltime job. My thought is whoever it is that has the potential to bring more $ in is to go for the fulltime or 2nd job.

If money is tight either he needs to get a full time job, another part time job, or you need to get a part time job.

Well yes - it would be wrong to "tell him" to get another PT job. But it wouldn't be wrong to sit down and discuss how the 3 of you are going to manage financially.

Some things to think about discussing: Can find a FT job? Can YOU find a FT job - or a PT job with hours that allow him to be home when you aren't? and so on....

Good luck.

The bottom line is that "someone" needs to step up to the plate and bring home enough money to support the family. Be it you, your partner or a combination of both.
Why would someone with a child and another adult to support only work a PT job? Odd to me.
I wouldn't think you'd "have" to tell him. Isn't it obvious?

Look into night jobs, too. For him or you. That way, at least one parent can be home with baby.

And ULTIMATELY, one of the jobs, has to be one that you both and baby, can have Medical Insurance, with.

I think someone needs to get a f/t job.

would you rather work and he stay home? Then you get the f/t gig. Otherwise he should.

It's definatley not being a control freak. If you can get by on a p/t paycheck and you are ok with that, fine-if not, then tell daddy to giddy up.

I would probably suggest that the partner staying at home tried to find a part time position on an opposite time schedule so both parents can share the money/childrearing responsibilities...

Someone needs to pony up...and it doesn't neccesarily need to be him alone. You both need to sit down and get on the same page...that being bringing in more money, no matter who, what, where when, or how.

My husband and I, when our second was born, knew we needed more money. I have two degrees in business and international trade...what did we do? He worked a full-time job during the day until 4 pm as a District Sales Manager...and I worked in a restaurant as a server and manager nights.

My mom was distraught that with my education I was doing exactly what I had done in high school to make extra cash...but I LOVED IT! She felt it was beneath me.

I was home with the kids during the day, and he had the night shift. He became very involved with ALL aspects of childcare - changing, meals, entertaining, etc because he had to. I handled it all during the day. Honestly...today he is as much involved in their lives as I am. He coaches their teams, goes to school weekly to help with math class, and all the "traditional" SAHM ideals...and still works his full-time job managing my family's business.

Hard, yes! We didn't have a lot of time together...but the time we had was more special. Now we both work full-time day jobs and honestly probably see each other less than when we worked alternating shifts.

Additionally, in spite of my education and what some believed was a huge step down...I found it liberating to work a job that I could socialize, make good cash immediately, and go into every day because I wanted to. Every single day I walked in, I knew I could enjoy my friends, gab, work hard, make great money...and if I had a bad day I tell the world where to go..walk away...and get a different job the next day somewhere else if I had to. It wasn't like my corporate jobs before where I had to worry about burning bridges and acting politically correct...it was fun. I loved it, and I averaged between $15-$50/hour which was great. Another benefit was that I could take off if I needed, or trade shifts if we had something going on. It was Godsend. I got to be around adults, and get paid! I could as many hours as needed or not.

I now am back in the "traditional" workforce again doing what I was educated to do...I make more money, yes...but sometimes I really miss the freedom of my night job. It was virtually stress free...kitchen burns something, you apologize, swear in the waitress station when you get stiffed, move on...and leave it at work. I LOVE my job now, but do miss the ability to walk away every night knowing it would all be fine tomorrow whether or not I mess up. It was tiring and crazy...but it worked.

I think you both need to sit down and figure it out...if you or he need to get two or three jobs...do it. If you need full or part time...do it. It isn't about you staying home, or him working more. It is about what is best for your child and your family as a whole...and working towards that goal together... however that may be. Your best bet of course is to both be working alternating shifts so you don't need childcare (if you can work it out), but if not, you need to do whatever it takes to make the best life possible for your child.

I would think both partners would need to do whatever it is they could do to keep the roof over head and the family intact. It's not just a man's job to bring home the bacon...

No it's not being a control freak, it's reality. However, you both brought this child into the world, therefore, it's both your responsibility to support him/her. You could get a job (full or part time).

You could always get a part time job too. Work opposite hours then daycare is not an issue. You don't say why he's only working part time, which makes a big difference, I think. If he just doesn't want to work more, you probably have bigger issues, or at least you will. If he can't get the hours at work, or find another job, that's a little different. If you are struggling then both of you need to take some type of action to support your baby.

I think the partner with the part time job should have the work ethic to go out and want to provide for his family without being pushed to get a second job or 1 good full time job.

Sounds like partner is a bit on the lazy side and ok with living paycheck to paycheck which is not good. He needs a wake up call to man up to his responsibilities.

No, not a controlling issue........you are looking out for the welfare of yourself and your child. You deserve a partner who does the same.

My husband and i have three jobs between us (two full-time and one part-time) in order to live the type of life we want and it is still difficult at times. We also have two children and it is still difficult at times. We have not really gone without. I don't know about now since I recently had my pay cut. I can't imagine surviving on one part-time job! there would be no way we could pay our mortgage and eat. In this economy it sometimes takes two incomes. I don't think it's selfish for him to work a full-time job. If it were me i would find a job as well. I would probably watch kids or babysit if I had no one to keep the baby.

Sounds like you may need a 3rd party to shake him out of his current situation. The answer is obvious. Put your baby first and you'll never be sorry. If you don't take a stand now, this will go on forever. I've seen it happen many times.

Updated

Sounds like you may need a 3rd party to shake him out of his current situation. The answer is obvious. Put your baby first and you'll never be sorry. If you don't take a stand now, this will go on forever. I've seen it happen many times.

I think you should tell him that or tell him you need to go to work.

A LOT more working needs to be going on! Someone needs to get another job -or two. You can work as well if you're struggling financially.

I think you have to do whatever it takes (legally and morally of course) to keep your child fed and with a roof over his/her head. Hopefully the partner has the same priority.

After that it is my personal opinion that a baby is better off with a parent when at all possible.

That is not being a control freak. He definitely should be working more. I wouldn't nag him though. I would ask him what his goals are, what his plan is, what he sees for your future, is he content to barely scrape by, etc. What does he do with all his time? Please tell me he doesn't waste his time playing video games. Men need to be men, not boys. {Sorry if I am stepping on toes, it's just so common in our culture. We have grown so fat and lazy as a society. We need to go about our lives working rather than playing.}

he needs another job or a full time job. you're not being a control freak, you just like to eat, have heating and air, and enjoy electricity.