Need Some Advice - Albuquerque,NM

I think she should go to a different doctor who isn't going to just blame it on being female. I personally would recommend she visit her OB/GYN or see a female doctor and maybe get some referrals for counseling. Severe mood swings like that are NOT normal. Some mood swings, yes, but not to the extent you are describing. Just be there for her and support her as she goes through this difficult time.

Offer to go with her for a psych eval. the problem with bi-polar is the cover well around officials. It helps if you are suportive and help her through the interviews. Set some ground rules before hand. there are organizations that will assess for free and make referals.

this is not the easiest thing to do keep reminding her that she admitted to wanting to not feel this way anymore. They need to hear from someone who has witnessed both up and down cycles.
deborah

It definitely seems like your friend is bipolar, as those are the "symptoms" commonly looked for. My grandmother, cousin, aunt, sister, step-mom, and husband's ex all have bipolar. They were not doing so great living in denial about it, losing jobs, friends and relationships over their incredible mood-swings and insecurities. Suggest to your friend that she be evaluated - and let her know there's nothing shameful or "crazy" about being diagnosed with it... once she knows, she'll be in a better place to seek help for it, whether in the form of a prescription, or by counseling. She owes it to herself and those that love her to seek help if she's really feeling like somethings not quite right.

First off I am happy that she brought this to your attention, and shame on her doctor for blowing it off as it was just part of being a woman.
My daughter is 15 and suffers from Bipolar. She was only diagnosed this past year. Please advise your friend to do some research, here is a link that she may be able to reference to see if she may be able to identify with some of the things that are listed so that she can go to a real doctor and talk to them about how she feels http://www.emedicinehealth.com/bipolar_disorder/article_e.... She need to go the a Psychologist or Psychiatrists to be able to be diagnosed properly.
This is not something that she can live with out getting help, it will take time to get to feel back to normal with all the medications that the try you on. She will have to see what will work for her. My Daughter had an allergic reaction to one of the medications and she has to take several of them, and yes it will seem like she is a zombie for awhile but she will get better.
There is help out there, and if she isn't Bipolar then they will let her know that she isn't and and she can rule that our as well but she needs at least get help.
Good luck and know that you are being a good friend by using this as a tool and a resource!

Hi J. -

There are a couple of herbs to balance both the saratonin and dopamine in her brain, as well as one to balance her hormones. This response is generic, but it's the best I can do without knowing her medical history.

The herbs are: Rhodiola & Vitex (Chaste Tree Berry)

If she would like a comprehensive health plan, feel free to pass my information on to her and have her contact me directly.

Blessings,

M. M. Ernsberger
Holistic Healthcare Practitioner
Certified Clinical Herbalist
Certified Master Hypnotherapist
Certified Life Coach
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She should have a simple blood test to get her thyroid checked. Thyroid problems often start after pregnancy and can take a long time to get diagnosed. It can't hurt to check that out.

It sounds like your friend at least knows she has a problem and is not in denial. That would be a much bigger problem. I'd encourage her to seek out professional help...whatever income level she has, there has got to be help out there.
Would she be more cooperative on an "up" or a "down" swing? I guess that would be the next part of a plan. I'd have some resources ready...suggestions of where to go when it hits..so you are not bogged down in a research step. Good luck!

Hi-
I have had depression and also bipolar disorder. I recovered from it this past August, but it wasn't an easy journey. Perhaps I can help and save your friend from some of the difficulties I had.
She should seek out a psychiatrist right away(you can also become suddenly suicidal). However, make sure that you check around with the hospitals in her area to check on the reputations and perhaps get a recommendation for a good doctor.
The other thing is that before taking any medicine, make sure she asks for a full explanation of what it will do to help her, as well as possible side effects. She will probably need to be on more than one med (I'm doing maintenance now and I still take 5 different meds). Make sure she also gets a full explanation of how they interact, and what each one is specifically for.
Because of mistakes with my medicines, I became where I couldn't get out of bed and was a drooling zombie. Fortunately, one of my good friends is a psychiatric RN PhD, and she asked me what I was taking, and told me to stop taking one of the meds. Sure enough- 2 days after I was up and around and had some energy back. I wound up unhappy with all the psychiatrists I had over that time (3 yrs)- I had 4 psychiatrists. Sometimes I felt they were more interested in using me as a guinea pig, than in me personally. I finally asked my GP to handle my meds because I had done a lot of research on the internet, and also with info from my friend, I was pretty sure I knew the "drug cocktail" that would help me. Amazingly my GP, because what I asked for made sense to her, just wrote out the scripts for me. Two weeks later I was fully recovered. Your friend can definitely be helped, and get her old self back. Just try to get her to be an informed consumer and not just do what the doc says- especially if he/she doesn't seem to want to take the time to talk about the meds specifically and how she's doing on them.
Best of Luck!
Z.

Hi did your friend recently have a baby? Could be postpardom depression. Otherwise yes she could be bi polar its not as uncommon as some people think. If she has a hormone imbalance than the right medication could make all the difference she should see a doctor who specializes in that field regular doctors cant help there. Good luck have a friend that could be going through the same thing.

She most definitel sounds bi-polar. Bi-Polarism runs strong in my dad's side of the family. I have read so much that they are coming out with this type of shock treatment. It sounds more harsh then it is, they have had a lot of positive things come out of it. Have your friend also get tested for any thyroid problems. My grandmother has been on thyroid medicine since she was 18. She has her good days and bad days. The more research she does and dr's she see's the better outcome she'll get. Give it a few years and they'll have more answers on how better to treat shortages, so to speak in the brain! In the mean time continue to be the great friend you are to her and maybe you can help research or accompnay her to dr appt's! Good luck! A. G

Wow- I want to start by saying that your friend is very blessed to have you and that she feels comfortable talking to you about her deep feelings. Also, just a bit about where I'm coming from on what I think here. I lived for 10 years with over 62 people in treatment for severe mental illness. And that covered all the range. And that taught me that we are all imperfect and struggle within ourselves. Also, that there is help and quality of life should you have manic depression, bipolar disorder to name but a few.

We need to listen to our bodies, but self diagnosis is never the best course of action. If she can control herself on any level she is most likely not bipolar. When you have that you are a time bomb walking around and you can 'loose it' and any point and anywhere. You said she would hide and cry if someone said something to her that was upsetting. people with bipolar disorder can't control. With that said, there is something going on. She has asked for help and sould get it. It sounds like she needs to be reassured that she is not loosing it. She is aware enough to recognise that something is wrong and that in itself is huge and shows good mental health! Counseling is that way to go. To be able to express herself and gather her feelings with help to make sense of them. What it does sound like from the above is that her self esteem is really shot. When something doesn't work out like a plan to meet- she may very well be telling herself that- she is not important enough to those around her to make it work. She isn't feeling good about herself and that feeds the flame. She may very well be depressed and this is fed further by her negative self talk. The good news there is that depression is common and there are numerous courses of action that can be taken and treatment that is very successful. I would look for someone that specialises in this issue to build her self confidence. As a friend I would tell her that when something doesnt work out that it has nothing to do with her that due to whatever it is- you unfortunately can't make the plan, but want to meet up again soon. A counselor will be able to determine what road she needs to take and if a course of medication is needed. She deserves to be happy- there is help- she took the first step-continue to hold her hand as she takes the next and see if together you can find someone to help her on the road to loving herself as much as you love her as a friend.

Just read a few of the responses- supprised by some. True, Bipolar disorder runs in families. And that a Psych doc may be required, but want to add that it is less intimidating to see a counselor so as a fist step is the hardest it makes it a bit easies.

Hello

I know a very good female nurse practitioner who your friend can go to... someone who is wonderful with women and understands all our emotional ups and downs. She is a compassionate person who will listen and get to the bottom of the problem and help her.

I know she could help your friend. She has helped me go from 50% to 200%. Just had some blood tests done and she perscribed me some med's. I am all better! And the best part of it..? It was so simple... all I had to do was make an appointment, Cindy Rosek took it from there.

Cindy Rosek NP-C, WHCNP
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6206 W Bell Rd
Glendale, AZ

First, it sounds like she needs a new doctor. (what an idiot) I dont know if shes bipolar, i think bipolar involves extreme dramatic changes in behavior.

In my opinion, it sounds like depression. Encourage her to find another doctor or talk to her OB/GYN. They can help her figure out what the next step is. Most likely meds and counseling :)

I would suggest that she go see a psychiatrist. It really is the only way for her to get a real diagonses if she is really bipolar, depressed ect. Primary care doctors are not specialized in this area and are not really qualified (in my opinion) to treat these conditions. Once she has been diagnosed and leveled out she may be able to return to her primary care Dr. for refills.

Also, If I were her I would change my primary care Dr. No doctor should ever blow off someone expressing a genuine concern about their mental health.

My step daughter exhibits many of the same symptoms as your friend. Unfortunately she is so extreme we can't reach her. In your friends case it appears that she is aware of her behavioral mood swings and wants to change them. To change those issues she needs to change her Doctor. Michelle Peters is a Nurse Practitioner in PV. She is good and will do what it takes to help your friend. Your friend is already half way to feeling better. By the way. What is a SAHM?

J.,

I grew up with a dad and brother who are both bipolar. Growing up it was hard, my dad didn't know he was for the longest time and it was hard on us kids. My older brother was also late in finding out, and now is on medication. Both my brother and dad are now on meds for this. My brother is now happily married. Bipolar is not something that should go under the radar and forgottn about, she needs to find out for sure if she has it, so someone can help her. But the point i am trying to get to is...Tell your friend just because the doctor blew her off, doesn't mean she has to stop there. Go and get second opinions, what ever it takes to get an educated answer. It is miserable not only for her, but also a stresser on the loved ones around her.

I know of a great place in town called the Women's Resource Center. They are there to help in all aspects of women's well being. They might be able to help, and if not, at least give her the names and numbers of someone who can.

I hope this helps, and feel free to write back ok! god bless, and tell your friend not to worry, everything will be ok, I'm living proof that even though it seems hard now, it does get better!

Hi J.
I don't know how your friend feels about meds but I had to go on an antidepressant (Lexapro) It stopped my witchy ways and I could quit crying over beer commercials.:-) If her pcp told her it was just part of being female, it's time to find a new pcp, that kind of attitude in doctors is not acceptable.

Bless her heart. Make sure they check to see if she has anything medically wrong with her brain or head. Comprehensive physicials never look at anything that might be wrong in our heads which can affect us medically.

Hi J.!

Your friend sounds like she might have some hormonal problems. I have found out recently that I have a low thyroid and am going through menopause. I am only 43. I had the same symptoms your friend is having. But mine also started affecting my health after awhile. I went to my doctors also and they just blew me off too. Then my mom suggested for me to go to my gyno. I went and I am on my way I hope to recovery. The gyno is the only doctor that really knows about your hormonal embalance. Tell your friend to hang in there and dont give up. But tell her to try the gyno first and have him run all the tests for hormones. Blood and Urine. Not just blood. Before she starts thinking its her mind make sure its not medical. I know from experience. Everyone including my friends thought I was a little crazy and depressed. But I kept telling everyone I know its medical not mental because I feel so bad. Well Good Luck!

DP

In order to get a diagnosis she needs to see a Psych Doctor. Counselors are great, but a doctor is the one that can help her figure out what's wrong and how to deal with it.

Sometimes all you can do for someone in that situation is listen - but it sounds like she is asking for more help than just someone to vent to - if she has such a bad self-image there must be something that happened to make her feel that way. Have you asked her what happened or why she feels the way she does about herself? Or what she thinks might make her feel better? Having people come up with their own solutions works much better than giving them advice they may or may not take to heart. Since she has talked to her doctor and he hasn't responded appropriately she shouldn't go back to him - for anything. She may simply need some counseling. Lots of women are insecure about themselves because of what society advertises as attractive but a doctor telling her it is just part of being female he isn't addressing the issue. If she really thinks she is bipolar she should find a different doctor who specializes in that disorder to find out if she has self-diagnosed correctly or not - or look into what she can do to help herself without seeking drugs - which is what most doctors will do for her. I personally don't think that doctors really care about most of their patients or have their best interests in mind - I believe that most of them are programmed to prescribe - and the drug companies give them incentives to use what they recommend or are experimenting with - and it's not good for the body or the mind. She needs to make sure she is feeding herself good nutrition - eating right, liking and feeling good about what she eats, so she won't have image issues - and balancing her systems so that they will work as nature intended - when the body and brain are deprived of what they need symptoms of dis-ease show up. Too often these symptoms are treated with a drug that causes more symptoms (side effects) because that isn't what the body needs. If she thinks she is unattractive (fat/chubby) she should look at what and how she eats and whether or not she gets enough exercise. And make conscious choices to do things that will be better for her. People need to learn what makes them happy (or not) and why. Once you know what makes you happy you can actively work to keep your life focused there or make the changes that will allow it. If you are interested, I can offer some suggestions as to some herbal supplements that help to balance all the body's systems - including the immune, endocrine and digestive - but especially the hormonal and nervous systems. When these systems are out of balance we just don't feel right, but when they are properly fed it is amazing how much different we can be. Sometimes people with a bad self-image don't want to believe that they are attractive because it obligates them to be so. Feeling good in your own body comes from making the choice to do so - just as not feeling good comes from choices. People need to be responsible for their choices and that empowers them to make the right ones. Doing good for yourself and others is a key to being happy. Feel free to contact me if you are interested in what herbs I would suggest trying. Good luck.