New Mommy and STRESS Stress Stress!

I agree with the Mall walking and the water outside suggestions. I would stress routine. Not sure how old your child is now but routine saved me when they were little. A sample of our typical day was after breakfast we left to do SOMETHING.. errands, groceries, library. Back home for nap and lunch, then SOMETHING, drawing, craft, sidewalk chalk, hide and seek, SOMETHING..... Then bath, dinner and reading before bed. It helps you both knowing what to expect. Good luck. The reason things are getting to you is because it's new and there is no structure. Make structure. Good luck and please don't worry. Your time with him is precious. Cherish it!

Okay, just now read he's 4 months old and your situation....in that case my SOMETHINGS would be, rolling a ball to him when he's on his tummy, giving him plastic spoons and cups to reach for and pick up. 1 inch of water in a outdoor plastic pool so he can splash and have some fun ( with you right there of course) , carry him around with a kangaroo pouch so you can do household stuff. I did this and we talked, I let him feel things talking about textures, colors etc. Naps will be a big part of his day still. Just involve him and GET OUTSIDE whether early or late in the day. Fresh air is important to you both! God bless...

Oh it is HARD! I feel your pain. My baby is 7 months old so I'm a little ahead of you, but I had a mental break-down like every week for the first 5 months. Now it's more like once a month ;-) Everyone tells you it's a lot of work being a new mom, but it's a down right SHOCK. It is stressful. I am going through the same thing. Yes, getting out does help, if it's hot or you don't have anywhere to go, it's ever harder! Routine does help. I find the mornings I get up and shower and get ready and make out a little list of what we're going to do (though we don't always stick to it) it makes you feel better. Try dancing around with him, it's exercise! Read to him a lot (that's one thing that helps me) and yes, have some help if you can so YOU can get out. Hang in there, it does get a little easier :)

I'm stressed and overwhelmed to the max every day... I've just learned to deal, and you will too ;)

I like XINE's idea of walking the mall... or a museum... or even the pet store. Anything to get out of the house and stay cool!

Give him something new to play with. How old is he? Buy an el cheapo play tent, throw some toys in there, and let him have at it. Even if he winds up trashing the thing, who cares? It was good for a solid (priceless!) 3 hours of fun, and you didn't spend a lot of money on it. (DIY tents are not the same ;))

Trade with another SAHM. Maybe a friend can take your kiddo for a few hours one day, then you could take her kid for a few hours the next. A few hours to get your head back on straight (or catch up on housework) is a beautiful thing!

Get a sitter, or a mothers helper, even if you're home, even if it's for a few hours.

Lastly, make yourself a cocktail, and put your kiddo down 1/2 hour early ;)

ETA: 4 MONTHS OLD! My tent idea won't work ;) Just remind yourself that when you have to put him down to shower/pee/clean/whatever, no child has ever died from crying and hollering for 1/2 hour ;) Does he like a baby swing? What about carrying him in a carrier against your chest? Not a wealth of information or suggestions on this one, my son, as an infant, was IMPOSSIBLE!!... Hence the wine ;)

I'm not sure how old your little one is, but instead of our daily afternoon walks I try to do an early morning walk. Also, we play in the water in the shade to help just get out of the house. Are there any Mommy groups around that meet once a week?

Ah I understand your pain. Being a SAHM is not for M.. I get very overwhelmed too when I am home with my son all day. I just keep waiting for my husband to get back home so that I can get a break. At 4 months your son must be sleeping a lot, so you do get some rest. I would say go out atleast once a day , no matter what. Since you live in a small town, I am guessing your hubby doesn't have a long drive to work. You can have him drop and pick you up. Or maybe you can drop him to work and have the car for yourself all day and go pick him up in the evening. You can take your son to the mall, grocery shopping, library (they have story times), park (malls have indoor play areas). Also at home , you can do simple activities/crafts with baby. I think you can google for it and get some great ideas for activities to do with baby according to their age. I know babycenter.com has it. Put on some music at home and dance with your baby. Get a baby carrier as well , it's easier than pushing stroller all the time. Taking care of baby all day is not easy even though we love them so much. Getting out of the house everyday helps.

Its not the same as Nature, but you could go and do laps around the mall! Walking is still walking :-) Good luck mama

ETA: why dont you go on line and look up a mommy and baby work out dvd !! That way you get to exercise - Huge stress reliever for you, and he gets Lots of contact and attention from mommy :-)
It Does get better ! I promise !! xox

*LOL Rachel ~ I also was going to offer a "Cocktail" but it seems that is Always what I suggest..... Just cause Iit works for me and it's 'my thing' doesnt mean I should try to make everyone else drink !! LOL
BUT really mama ! A relaxing drink after baby goes to bed Does wonders for your nerves

When you are at home, I would suggest you get one of those bouncer activity play centers like the leapfrog jungle where the child sits in the jumper, while he is surrounded by lots of toys music and noise.. this might keep him busy for at least half an hour or so. You could also look to see if there are other mommies in your area, and do play dates.

Take his favorite toy or blankie and go walk around Target. You dont have to buy anything and it is air conditioned. You can hook a musical toy to his stroller and go look at the toys.

Check out your local Recreational centers for Open Gym days for infants and toddlers. They are quite cheap, I think around $5 per hour and they should have it at least once a day - and some will let you purchase a punch card with 10 visits for a cheaper rate.

that way you can stay cool while he is crawling around and playing around on the obstacles (with your help of course - just relax but make it fun and easy for both of you). You can bounce with him on a trampoline or roll him around on the gym mats.

Good luck

Also check if there is a Kids Park or a Gymboree in your area. Recreational centers offer more than just open play, you can enroll him in other things too... also they give indoor swimming lessons for ages 6months and up. If you are interested in teaching him how to swim and cool off in the process. I know he is a little young for swim lessons.. yikes, but you could just go to their open swim days and relax with him in the waddle pool (zero depth).

Hi! Make a list - what is REALLY important to you? Prioritize. Then JUST DO WHAT YOU CAN. Enjoy your son first - he's going to grow up so fast you won't believe it and you can never get that time back. Laundry, the dishes, errands, etc. will always be there. When you are an old woman, will you lament that you had ham sandwiches for dinner (so you had extra time with your son) instead of a ham dinner (and less time with your son)? Simplify your house. I boxed up all my knick knacks when I had kids - I didn't want to take the time to dust everything. I'll pull them back out after the kids are older. Another thing that may help is a routine: make a schedule with the things you want to do and stick to it.

For stress release, how about dancing? Put your baby in a sling/baby carrier and dance to your favorites in the living room - this always put me and my baby in a good mood!

That's too bad that there aren't any other moms for you to meet with. Do you have a neighbor or friend who would be able to watch your son for 15 minutes so you could go for a quick walk? Sometimes just a short break and some fresh air (even hot air) helps.

Is it possible you have a little PMD? I was at home with my son (on maternity leave) for over 3 months and spent most of it feeling very much like you do. Shortly before I went back to work I returned to my pre-pregnancy dosage of anti-depressants and things improved significantly in a very short period of time. Granted, I have a history of depression, but what you are describing sounds familiar.

There are a lot of reasons for feeling overwhelmed and stressed out and certainly those feelings can be explained situationally. But if by making changes in your day and your interaction with others doesn't help, than there could be something else going on.

I wish you the best. I don't have the balls to be a SAHM but I have a lot of respect for those who do.
K.

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