Not in the Mood. . . Ever.

You are not the first, nor the last, to experience this! Definitely go and get checked, but if everything is fine organically, then, the only thing that works, in my opinion, is that the man STOPS asking altogether and gloriously leaves the wife alone until, finally, she can work up some healthy desire and starts (or, rather, re-establish) the positive trend. But most men can't do it and get really irritable. Which definitely makes it worse! I vote for men to finally "get it" and use patience towards their wives, instead of the wives forcing themselves to have sex (which leads to:1.bad sex,2.feeling of "being used", 3.resenting the husband, 4.more lack of desire). My personal view on the matter is that a Man should know how desire works for a woman, and if he doesnt, well, he should educate himself and learn. Sex is important in a marriage but it's complicated (or can be) and it's worth exploring in all its hues. So I would do my "homeworks" but he should do them as well!!!

Sex is about connecting. It is "normal" after having a baby to steer away from sex. Yes you should see your doctor because your hormones may be all out of whack still.

I love Mamazita's answer which is also a consideration.

Your baby will grow quickly and if your marriage is important to you I would strongly suggest you figure out how to get back into the saddle and ride again.

It is very important for your marriage, your health and your husband's health too. Besides your baby will need to see a healthy loving relationship so he can know how to have one. Get to the doc's and get your mind ready to be intimate with your husband again. I'll be praying for you.

Do yourself a favor and ask your doctor to run blood tests to check your thyroid function (TSH, as well as free T4/free T3). Your symptoms sound a lot like mine did before my hypothyroid condition was diagnosed/treated. Pregnancy and childbirth can wreak havoc on your thyroid, and it can take months for a lack of thyroid hormone to make itself known. Because I ignored my initial symptoms (lack of sex drive, acne, headaches, tiredness, irritability), they got worse, to include really heavy and long period, hair falling out, feeling cold all the time, muscle cramps, feeling "winded" after doing something as simple as walking across a parking lot, unexplained weight gain, inability to lose weight, loss of appetite... anyway. Fortunately it's easily treated. Ask your doctor to have you tested, and know that your TSH number should be between 1-2 to be "normal" (not 0.5 - 5.5 like some labs try to tell you).

Good luck!

Women get "hormonal" just before and sometimes during their period. Women tend to tell their husband in words or deeds, "Its normal, Learn to live with it". Well, men get more and more "hormonal" the longer the time between making love sessions.

One of your responders said your husband should read and learn about women's hormones. Good advice. The same is true for women. To learn about your husband and how he feels, read the book, "The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands." Its written about 75% for women and about 25% for men. You will learn a lot about your husband from this book. And he can learn a lot about women if he will read this book.

I you aren't making love to your husband because you are tired, then tell him what he can do to ease some of your burdens so you won't be so tired.

Marriage is a compromise between two people that love each other. I did things my wife wanted me to do and I asked her to do things I wanted her to do. We both did things we didn't want to do to help each other. I went to work everyday doing a job I hated for years because she wanted me to. I could go on and on, but you get the idea.

So there is no misunderstanding, make love to your husband on a regular basis, even if you don't want to.

Good luck to you and yours.

Sounds like PMS.
As you said, your symptoms are cyclical and before your period.
And since it is cyclical and before period, then it is hormonal.

Have your Husband, read about PMS. Look up articles online etc.
My Husband would tell me that I am the ONLY WOMAN IN THE WHOLE WORLD, that gets irritable and moody once a month. Because, he said, he sees women everyday out and about and THEY are not grouchy like me. So to him, it was only "my" problem. Then I had him read articles about it. It helped a little.

Anyway, yes, after I had my kids as well, my PMS was different. More moody. About 1 week before my period and yep, I hate being clawed at when I am PMS'ing.

Yep, it is hormonal. I tried to deal with it for 2 1/2 years after my last child and finally buckled and got on the pill. I am not going to be on it long since estrogen is linked to breast cancer. I am so much happier, my acne is clearing up, and my drive is back :) Do what you think is best.

I think it is "normal" in that it is commonly experienced after having a child - especially if they are all over you all day long. I have two boys 4 and 1.5 and some days when my hubby comes home I tell him straight away that I need to have some space for an hour or two before we snuggle on the couch or do anything else requiring physical contact!

But since you said things were getting better for a while and are now getting worse, I think you should definitely see a doctor. I respectfully disagree with 8kidsdad's suggestion to make love even if you don't feel like it - this is not a healthy way to treat this particular situation. If you do have an underlying medical problem or if your marriage is in need of help begrudgingly having sex is NOT the solution. Being too tired may not be just a case of needing to divide labor more equally - it can be indicative of serious health issues.

And if your husband loves and respects you he will understand that you need to figure out what is going on. Maybe sit down with your DH and have a very frank discussion regarding this - maybe it is just hormones, maybe you need to address emotional issues within your marriage, maybe you need to rekindle the romance? One thing that has worked for me is to give my hubby "coupons" - with the stipulation that they are given to me in the morning (to be redeemed in the evening) so that all day while doing mundane tasks like laundry, dishes, meal prep, yada yada yada in the back of my mind I was thinking about fulfilling the coupon request that evening - really worked me up. But like I said, I really do think you should go to the doctor to make sure that everything is okay - and for what it is worth, it is okay to sometimes be too tired. Our youngest had surgery a week ago and hasn't slept through the night since - up EVERY HOUR ON THE HOUR. Neither of us are really in the mood to do the deed so we've just been cuddling when we can to keep the physical connection!