On a Mission to Enjoy Our Kids More! What Are Your Tips?

ohhhh, how wonderful are you?????
just MAKING this resolution will do 90% of it for you, i'm betting.
i so wish more young parents would do this!
:) khairete
S.

We have a 4 and 2 year old. On weekends, we do a family swim and a family movie. The kids love it.

We also do little day trips. This Sunday we are going to an amusement park. I find it much easier to just "play" with my kids when we are not at home.

We also love to go to the library together.

Sounds like an excellent plan! Read to them. The one year old can also participate in this too if he can sit still. Go to the library. Go outside and take a walk. Collect bugs. Sit in the grass. Look at clouds. Find a stream or pond and explore that. Have fun!

Well this is just the nicest post I've read in a long time.

Lucky kids.

:)

“Realize deeply that the present moment is all you have. Make the NOW the primary focus of your life.”
― Eckhart Tolle, The Power of Now:

Be his age, no worries on your mind, see the world through your kid's eyes.... it's very relaxing when you stop controlling for a time and just BE with them.
Have a wonderful wknd!

My DD is 4 (almost 5) and is hyperactive and sometimes hard to please. I have found a TON of fun things for her to do via pinterest. The BEST one so far was the sidewalk paint! 1/2 cornstarch, 1/2 water, some food coloring and paintbrushes and we spent HOURS on the patio having a "painting contest". Cheap, easy, fun!

We always had one day on the weekend where we WENT somewhere, the other day was spent at home, doing stuff around the house.
Our favorite outings were hiking, going to the beach, zoo or museum, going to the movies, concert in the park, the pool, driving up to Grandma and Grandpa's to play with the cousins, or going into the city or an amusement park (we have a few local ones that are small and inexpensive.)
At home the kids were always included in the chores. When my son was four he LOVED helping daddy work in the yard or garage, and all my kids enjoyed gardening and cooking with me.
Instead of seeing them as something that needs to be entertained or monitored see them as people you want to spend time with, and invite them into your world. Example, instead of saying, will you watch the boys while I wash the car? take the boys out with you and wash the car together. Much more fun!

Morning
Early on in our son's life, we decided that we wanted to enjoy ALL stages of his life (the good, the bad and the ugly :) However, I should note that because we know that it all passes so quickly , truly, we have enjoyed every single moment... Many people said to beware of the terrible twos... we didn't buy into that, instead we enjoyed the terrific twos.... and so on..

I really think it comes down to trying not to sweat the small things.. Also, when we are with our son, we truly like to be present, I don't sit there and text and or email.. when it's time to be with my son, I like to really be present and enjoy his company. I think in life it comes down to the simple things, love , love , love.. In a case where you can't always be around your children or have so many things to juggle, then during those times when you can enjoy them, then just do that enjoy them...

By virtue of your post, I think you seem to really enjoy your kids and are on the right track.. I would add that as your kids continue to grow and although you may still have lots of things to juggle, allow your children to participate. Example, my son who is now ten helps me with the grocery list and shopping.. He also loves maps , so he is great at giving directions.. Although, you may still have things to get done, it's more fun to do them as a family... find ways to incorporate the kids ... that way, not only will you enjoy them even more but your kids will like that idea of really being included .. it's a win win situation..

my best to you and yours..

Great goal. I do my best consciously usually, but alone with three and all house duties, sometimes I just really AM to busy all day to focus on each child properly. If all else fails, right after dinner, no matter how tired I am, instead of turning on the TV for one show (which I sometimes do as my only mental break of the day while the kids play before bed routine), I keep TV off, and just go sit in the TV room with them. From there I let them perform. I watch my son practice his Tae Kwon Do moves, or my daughter practice her violin and TKD moves, or I watch them tell stories and jokes or do weird dances or whatever oohing and ahhhing, my third is older now (and shows off the most jumping, dancing, etc, but when she was one we would cuddle while watching other two. They LOVE the direct attention and we always have fun moving into our bedtime game where one or two hide at top of stairs and pretend to "be something" and the rest of us come up surprised to see Godzilla, Rocky the boxer, whatever, so we ask "the mystery character" to be guests on their mountain top for the night, play a bit more, book, water, prayers, bed. Just that couple of hours at night is really special.

I realized I was spending my weekends getting chores done while watching toddler and not enjoying him enough. so I scheduled in a mommy and me class. I needed that scheduled, paid for, class to make sure I stopped and just had fun with my child. I ended up switching to a weeknight because the Sat morning class was so crowded but that broke the habit of me just cleaning and doing chores over the weekend. Getting out of the house helps, make it a goal to go to playground at least once a week. We also go to children's museum, nature center, farms, pet store, go for walks. Try to choose activities you will enjoy as well, if you dislike swimming dont take a baby and me swim class, my hubby likes the playground and bike rides more than I do, I love finding activities at the local library, farm etc. ENJOY, I have a 24 yr old and almost 21 yr old, so I KNOW how quickly they grow up and move out, enjoy every week of your little ones they change so quickly!

As a single parent I can get bogged down with what I HAVE to do sometimes, then realize my guy is what it's all about. Single parents can't always share the responsibilities with someone, so it can be hard to just have fun, we feel as if we should be doing something constructive, lol!

My advice is to be spontaneous. Stop and do something with him when he asks, and do it just for the fun of it. Be silly. Open yourself up to seeing the world through his eyes, he may just amaze you, they both might. Make memories. Throw schedules out the window and roll with whatever comes your way, just enjoy your kids.

Since you say your son is highly active, I'd either choose to stay home for the weekend, or do something simple like go to a park with big open spaces. Especially because you have a baby, keep things easy.

Just do fun things with him that he likes, play tag, with balls, walk through the woods, bubbles, paint with water outside, slip n'slide, water balloons, squirt guns, kid pool, sidewalk chalk, practice riding bike/tricycle.

Read several books to him. I think reading to my son has helped him to be able to play on his own, reading has worked for that with my son at least. I'll read him a story and then hear him acting out the story with his toys up in his room or outside, it's really great!

One way is to ask/teach your children to help you with your chores.
Particularly since you mention that you swap "kid duty" while simultaneously trying to get through your to-do list. So rather than alternate to-do list and kid-duty... make it a joint affair.

Laundry? Have your 4 yr old bring all the baskets of dirty clothes to the laundry room. Have him help you make a pile of only white things. Have him separate out the towels/washcloths. Let him help stuff the dirty things into the washer, and help add the detergent.
If your 1 yr old isn't JUST turned 1, and it confidently mobile (can carry things), let him help you carry socks to the drawers they need to be put away in. Ask him which chore you should do next. Figure out some small way that he can help---even if it is simply pointing out to you where you've missed a spot...

1) Your kids learn HOW to do things they'll need to know how to do eventually
2) You are all working together on the chores, so nobody has "kid duty".
3) It can sometimes make your chores more fun and less "work".
4) You will be spending time with your kids! And they are at the prime ages for wanting to mimic/help you. :)

ETA: and there is nothing cuter than a young tot with Dad's oversized Tshirt on like a dress, or your underwear on their head like a hat. That sort of stuff tends to only happen if they are helping with the laundry, lol.

I know a lot of people are saying to get out of the house but I think that is the easier fix. You probably have a home where you have a lot of toys, books, movies, stuff that your kids can show you what they do with. For me personally I think I need to focus on listening to my kids an learning their thought process and doing the things they want to do. In my job I oversee 250 employees who are legally adults but they act like children. So I have almost zero patience when I get home to my kids. so sad. I have to take a breather. My 7 year old acts more mature than most of my employees so I often forget she is 7. So i am trying to concentrate on her being 7 and thinking about what 7 year olds want.

For me, one of the best things about having a child is the opportunity to see the world anew through their eyes. Before my husband and I had kids, we rode the train from Fort Worth to Grapevine with some friends. It was a beating! One of the most boring things we have ever done. Years later, when our oldest son was two, we took him on the same train, because he LOVED trains. It was a blast! We both marveled at what a difference it made to enjoy the experience with our son, because he was so excited about it.

Think of exposing them to a variety of new and different activities. What did you or your husband enjoy as a child, but no longer do? What are your kids interested in. At the ages your kids are, anything can be fun and exciting to them. Yes, you can go swimming or to a playground, but chances are they would also enjoy simple activities that we take for granted. Ride the DART train to downtown Dallas, go to the mall and ride elevators and escalators, ride a city bus, go to the airport and watch planes, go to a train yard and watch trains, go to a construction site and watch the equipment, take them to your place of work, museums, zoos, aquarium, live performances.

My oldest son was very active and would hardly even watch TV at a young age (he has ADHD), but even at age one and two, he loved live performances - plays, musicals, puppet shows, etc. He would sit still for an hour puppet show, but not a movie or TV. There is a variety of good local theater for kids in the metroplex. Both of my boys have loved to go to Science museums and aquariums. If you buy a family membership, they usually have reciprocal agreements with other museums. This has been wonderful when we travel, because we can go to museums in other cities for FREE!

We also enjoyed going to "festivals" on the weekends. It is a little hot right now, but in the Fall, look on guidelive.com for various festivals in the area. My kids always got so excited when we told them we were going to a "festival."

Kudos to you for making a conscious effort to really enjoy your kids. I see wonderful benefits for your kids as well as you and your husband!

Get out of the house. I find that when we're in the house I'm distracted by all the things that need to be done. I'm always more relaxed and enjoy my kids more when we get out of the house. When it's hot out, consider taking them to the pool (indoor or outdoor) or to a local lake. Or even a mall that has a really nice kids play area. Or a library. Heck, even Chuck E. Cheese! My 5 year old loves playing skeeball there (it's always been one of my favorite games so it's a bonding experience).

I agree with the get out of the house idea. Plan something like the zoo etc. that way there are no chores staring you in the face plus the house stays clean while you're gone.

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We did this not intentionally at first. We adopted my biological neice as an infant and took her in as an emergency at ten days old with no plan.

It was a painful struggle with the courts and before we had custody my sister could show up and say "give me my baby" and we had to turn her over. This happened about half a dozen times, My sister wanted money and other things, not the baby.

When this type of situation happened to us in the middle of the night we had an absolute profound appreciation for our daughter that I can't even convey. We had such an appreciation for her and were amazed by everything about being a parent. We loved every stage and looked forward to the future. It's amazing the patience that is there when you have had it taken away over night.

We have a wonderful ninteen year old daughter ready to begin her second year in college. She's a really amazing human.

I made this same resolution at the beginning of the summer.

My son is 4 and he was already very helpful when it came to chores. He helped me cook dinner every night, helped with his laundry, cleaned his room every night, swept up the floor with his hand-held dust pan, clearing the dishwasher, etc.

But like someone else mentioned, I longed for that debriefing time between after dinner and before his nighttime routine. As a working mom with direct employees, I was tired. I begin to realize, however, that this was the perfect time to spend with my son. We play with puzzles or matching/memory games at least every other night. Some nights it's laundry and small housekeeping. Some nights its Nick, Jr. Other nights it's playing a new game. I realized that it can be very simple and does not always have to be drawn out. We go grocery shopping on the weekends, and he helps me prepare my list, cut out the coupons and helps me in the store. Other weekends we head to the library and the farmers market. Sharing a bag of kettlecorn has become our tradition :)

Best of luck to you! It's a lifechanger!

Here's some of our top things, just have fun with whatever you do.
1. We all climb into bed at a certain time at night and read a story/bible - MAKE IT AN APPOINTMENT, not a if I have time. All of mine can read, so we take turns reading a page. (you and dad read until they can).
2. We dedicate every friday as family night and eat pizza and watch a movie in our pj's, or eat pizza and play a board game. My girls love monopoly.
3. Take a walk in the evening together and talk about your day.
4. Hug them and tell them I love them EVERYDAY!
5. We pray together at night. They each pray individually, then I/my husband pray at the end. Remember don't edit their prayers, they get to be more interesting as they grow. :)

You should ask your oldest what he wants to do and do it. Better yet just do something that they might not ever expect. For example, build a tent in the living room and make a pretend type of fire. Have a mystery in your house. Just something that they will enjoy.

find a tradition and make it your own.