Posibility of Relocating

Go!
I am an Army wife and I move myself and my three children all the time appox, every three years. While having family nearby is a great convienence, it aids in a little bit of laziness. Yoa are amazed at how resourceful you can be when you need to be.
Get a teen in your new neighborhood to babysit, find another couple with children your own age and swap sitting nights or days.
It's good to find what your really made of when you out on your own. A new environment can be wonderful for your children. It will help them seek their inner strength, make them more outgoing and see that maybe the grass is greener. Add some adventure to your life. Airplanes fly in both directions.
You and your husband and children are your FAMILY now, everyone else is extended. Go. you won't regret it.

As a native Californian who has lived in New York for over 15 years, I can say that it is a very big change between the two places. Have you had an opportunity to visit the area in California where you will be located? There is a very big difference, for example, between Northern and Southern California. I think in making this decision, you should at least have the opportunity for a quick visit. How is the school system in the town where you will be? What types of support services do they have? These will be very important in making sure you have a good transition.

I grew up in Riverside, CA. People in New York always think of the wonderful warm weather, and they don't remember that it can be 105 degrees for weeks on end with smog in the summer. My sister-in-law, who grew up in New Jersey, actually went to college in Riverside and couldn't take the heat. Northern California will be much more moderate in climate, so this is why I think it is important to really understand and research what part of CA you will be in.

Finally, what do you and your kids like to do? If your daughters are big ice skaters, I can tell you there won't be a lot of ice skating opportunities in Southern California. If your family is big on winter activities, you may have less of an opportunity to do these things. On the other hand, if you have water babies who love the pool in the summer, they will love to have year round access to open air pools.

The family issue is also hard. It is hard for me to drag my husband and 2 kids across the country to see my family in CA. We try to get there as much as possible, but it is difficult economically on both sides. Right now I am fortunate to have my mother-in-law nearby.

Anyway, I think you should trust your heart, and if you really want to move to Cali, do it, but be sure you research exactly what your community will be like first. Do not make a spur of the moment decision based on the fact that it is really cold in February.

You just dont say if you think you will regret not moving.. sometimes that could be worse .. than leaving everone else behind.

I think you and your husband need to sit down and have a long talk about the pros and cons of moving away, and how each one weighs in. It's not fair of him to put it on you, even if his intent is to give you a say, you'll all be impacted. While being away from your family might be hard at first, it's a great opportunity for them to travel to the west coast and visit you in CA, and you'll always know you have a place to come home to (here in NY).

My guess is if they are offering a transfer, it's probably coming with more money, and that could be great for your family in the long run. Just keep in mind that offers don't always come around. At the end of the day, if you don't like it out there, you can always move back. I think if part of you wants to go, you should try it. That way you'll know if it was the right decision (either you'll love it, or you'll come back to NY) but you won't spend the rest of your life wondering, "What if...?"

hello. I recently moved to hong kong from europe. long trip to get here. i prolly will manage to go back home twice a year.
we are here for my husband's work. I now a stay home mom with 01 girl of 19 months.
moving to a new place gives you new energy, meeting new people, new experiences or your family, your girls and for your self. so far feels like home here. the city is beautiful.very caotic.but full of parks and forests, the sea, beaches.
one of my main concerns was about my family. I love them and I miss them so much.my parents have already bought flight tickets to come over but my grandma can not certainly come..that makes me sad. I know that my daughter will grow up having perhaps a different and less deep relationship with her grandparents.
but I speak to my family back home every day thanks to skype or email daily. sometimes I have the feeling that our relationship is getting deeper and stronger thanks to the long distance.ironic...ehh ?
you are lucky to have your own business that helps so much. it will allow you to feel connected to your new home and will define your identity as a person and as a mother.
good luck with your choice and feel free to write whenever you want ! M.

We actually lived in CA after college, got married bought a house etc. We are NY natives and our families are in NY . Our first child was 10 mos old when we moved back to NY. Family is too important, and no amount of money or ladder climbing will ever overcome that.
We missed our families tremendously- enough to give up our comfortable lives in a great town to move 3000 miles across the country to have our kids grow up knowing their grandparents. It was probably one of the biggest decisions of our lives, and one I will never regret. :-)
Also- it needs to be a joint decision- if he says it's your choice, that gives him the right to say "it was your decision" you when you are crying that you are missing everyone. That's just not fair to you! I am sure whatever you decide together will be the right thing for your family.
If you do decide to go, CA is really very nice- great weather, nice people, slower pace/ lifestyle. People are calmer too which is a great environment to raise children in.
Good luck :-)
PS- we lived in Northern Cal...
PPS- Nor cal housing prices are more ridiculous than they are here in NY!

No don't do it...family is so important, not only for you but for your kids also.