RSVP To Parties and Teenage Boys

I'd have him call the mom and ask if its alright if he came today since he did not RSVP in time. And leave it in that moms hands to decide.

Seriously??? I cannot even get ADULTS to RSVP most of the time....

Let him go!! .

I am glad he got to go!! :0)

If I was the Mom and I got a call from your son apologizing for not RSVP'ing I would be perfectly fine with him coming anyway. We were all teenagers at one point this is really not a big deal! Let him go! In all the bday parties I've had for my kids, there are usually 1 or 2 ppl that forget to RSVP and It never bothers me when they show up anyway. If anything they are a welcome surprise.

Just have him eat beforehand so he doesn't gobble up too much of the food considering the host didn't account for him when ordering or preparing the food.

Just the fact that he has to call will be humbling enough so that he will not forget to RSVP next time! Besides the bday boy will be glad a lot of the kids showed up!

Nope. First and foremost, the only reason he wants to go is because his friend is going...not because he had any interest in the party or the host. But that is a followed almost in a neck and neck tie with the fact that he didn't RSVP. He doesn't think the host will pick up on the fact that he didn't RSVP but is showing up with his friend who did?

IF (and it's a big IF), his friend goes to the party and the subject comes up among the kids and the host says "well he can STIlL come, go call him and see if he wants to come on..." THEN, I would consider it acceptable to let him go. But I would be surprised if that situation were to arise.

Yep, he's going to sulk. But he'll do better next time, won't he? And isn't that what you are trying to do... help him learn how to be a responsible adult eventually? Unfortunately, it seems a LOT of parents dropped the ball when it comes to the RSVP thing. Ever notice how many parents are on this site complaining about the lack of response to RSVPs for kids birthday parties??? If you don't teach him.... no one will. And then who will teach HIS kids one day?

n.

I think your son should call and ask if he can still come, IF in fact he wants to attend because he likes the b-day boy...NOT just because all his friends are going. Also, IMHO your son should absolutely NOT show up empty handed, if in fact he ends up going...that would be double-lee (not sure how to spell that word, or even if it is one :) rude!

~I have thrown a few parties for my teenage sons and I never received not 1 RSVP....yeah, it was rude but I got over it...I still wanted my kids to have a great party and was glad that the other parents didn't let their kids come just because they didn't RSVP in time...sure it would have been better if the parents were on top of it and making sure the kids RSVP'd but that's life!

---EDIT---
Sorry I read your question wrong, not a b-day party, just a party...I stick with my answer, just have him call ahead...and I guess that means he doesn't need to bring a gift, yay! :)

Let him call the teen/mom hosting the party and see if it is ok.

i know the rules of RSVP and I always ask for it when i host a party. However, I know that most people usually don't RSVp so i always have plenty of food. This mom more than likely got plenty expecting lots of teenage boys lol.

i wouldn't want to say he just cant go...teenage boys ego and status' with peers are very fragile and very important and this probably isn't that big of a deal to cause problems over.

He absolutely cannot go. IMO, it's rude to even call and ask - it's putting the host in an incredibly awkward position of saying "no." If you want him to learn manners, this is the time. Sorry that you're going to have to deal with him stomping around the house for a bit : )

Your son needs to call asap and ask if it is still ok to come.

RSVP is used for a reason ... this is a good life lesson to learn.

I would let him go but not just show up without calling the mom first! I would call instead of him and say that he was a flake and wants to go but didn't rsvp and was wondering if he could still go. If so, make sure he brings a nice bday gift!

This is a tough one because I am with you, it is rude to don't call. I also think you are right, this is a good lesson for him.
On the other side I think that the birthday boy will like to have his friends over.
My only problem is that if he was a kid, I think it would be your responsibility to have made the RSVP, since he is a teen is his responsibility, but also his decision if he still wants to go and look rude.
Is like you say: You are old enough to make your own RSVP but if you don't, you are not enough to take the decision on go anyway.
I say, if he really wants to go advice him to call and apologize and ask if he still can come.
Every body can forget to RSV, but it says more of him if he accept his mistakes and call, apologize and brings something (with his own money).

I told my daughter all the time that she is getting to the point where people don't look at me and blame for things, like if she doesn't want to brush her hair at 13, I doubt people would think: Oh my, her mother is bad mom for not brushing that little girl's hair" sorry but people will start thinking "That girl is not taking care of her self" and perhaps they also need to learn that if they are old enough to decide some stuff they also have to deal with the consequences.
In your son case it could be the other mom saying "sorry but not", not being invited next time, or to go and offer an apology and bring something with his own money.
At least is that what I would do.

If he didn't RSVP, then that's the same as an RSVP of "No." He RSVP'd in the negative by ndoing nothing, so he doesn't get to go.

have him call the other mom & ask if it's okay for him to come. That way he takes ownership of the issue.

I personally would let him go...

You could call the mom and ask what she would prefer. They might want him there anyway. And if he goes, make a big point about how next time he'd better do the polite thing and RSVP.