ThaWanting To Quit the PTA

PTA isn't a job, it's volunteer. If the volunteer stuff gets in the way of the paying job, the volunteer stuff has to go.

I am a PTO board member, work full time, have 3 kids, am 25 weeks pregnant, and have a husband who travels, so I understand being stretched thin.

That said, talk to your board president and let him/her know that you're not sure you can perform your duties. See if someone can help pick up the slack with a co-whatever position, even if just temporarily until you get adjusted. Either way, you made a commitment and your board and your school is counting on you to do your job AND do it well. Don't just quit and leave them in the lurch, but also don't do a lax job without first asking for help.

You are now working 7 more hours a week - is that permanent or is the increase in hours temporary? What PTA job did you agree to take on this year? How much time does that position require? Do you have to be at school to do this job or do you just need to attend PTA board meetings and handle your role on your own time? I think you should try to honor your commitment to serve the rest of your term. I worked full time for several years and served on the PTA board too. I found that it helped me really understand what was going on at my kids' schools. Discuss this with the president and tell her about your increased work demands. See if there are any parts of your PTA assignment that can be shared by others. Some PTA jobs were year long in nature, others were handled in smaller increments of time. I would not leave them "high and dry" - if you must leave, is there someone you could suggest that might be interested in taking your position??

Really and truly, ANYONE who doesn't like you anymore because you couldn't continue to do PTA after working longer is NOT your friend. (You don't want to be friends with people who expect you to stay up til 3:00 am to do PTA stuff...)

Do you know what is worse than quitting? Doing a bad job, letting things slip between the cracks, that kind of thing. Someone else will step up - that's the president's job, to find someone else. She knows that too. Don't let anyone try to guilt you into doing what's right for you.

I know you're saying you'll stick it out, but as someone who has participated in PTA positions, Girl Scout leader, church positions, other groups -- I would always, always much rather a person come forward quickly and definitively and say out loud and clear, "My situation changed and I no longer have the time I expected to have to do this job WELL." I have done the same thing myself: Gone to an organization and said I was not going to be able to continue with them and wanted them to know sooner rather than later.

It does any organization no favors to stick with a job to which you can't devote adequate time and energy. Better for them to know that you must end the commitment on Date X than to let it drag on and on with "Can you stick with us until we find someone else?" I have seen the latter situation happen -- the person feeling guilty and obliged to hang on until a replacement is found, and the organization feeling, frankly, less pressed to find any replacement because "Well, Sally's going to hang on until we find someone so we're at least covered...." It makes the organization feel it has some wiggle room to not really find anyone, or to not learn to cope without anyone in the job.

I am all about commitment to any volunteer position. But I have been through this for a LONG time and know it is not healthy for a person to try to hang on in a job out of a feeling of "I committed to this" when there is not the time to do it -- you cannot manufacture time, and your family is your first priority. It is not healthy for the organization to have people in posts where the people can't fully commit, either. I get that PTA is a tough place to find volunteers. But unless your position is a crucial one like president, treasurer, VP, or a committee chair of a vital committee -- I'd really think about whether it is good for you and for the PTA to just stick it out.

I have been the sole person running one PTA program the past two years because if a parent does not run it, it will not happen, period. But it also is not an absolutely key program (it's an arts event). If it vanished, it would be a real pity but it also would not be the end of PTA as we know it. I have the time to do it. But if my life situation changed I would seriously consider giving it up.

this for me is a simple one. yes, you made a commitment. but your circumstances have changed, and it's no longer working for you. if possible, i'd stay and help them find and train a replacement, but sweetie you've got to put yourself and your family first. it's not always pejorative to be a 'quitter'. you've got 3 kids whose well-being is more important.
it's not like you're walking away from people on respirators.
explain your situation to the PTA, offer to help in a reduced capacity, and enjoy your family.
khairete
S.

I am currently our school's PTA president. Last year, I was a VP, and for the two years before that, I was treasurer. I've also chaired committees and assisted with every other committee in some manner over the last several years, so I know PTA can be a big time commitment.

If you truly feel you cannot do this, talk to your board and let them know as quickly as possible. This has happened to us in the past with board members and with committee chairs. (This is one of the reasons why we always like to have co-chairs for the really big committees).

One of my friends had to resign from the treasurer position last year because she went from part-time to full-time at her job. She told us as soon as she realized she could not do the treasurer position with her new work demands. I still think the world of her and appreciate that she was realistic about the situation. We found another mom to take on the role, and all was well.

Be realistic about what you can and cannot do and be honest with your other board members. If you are going to stay on, ask for help when you need it so that you don't feel overwhelmed.

Best wishes

J. F.

Put in a notice of when you will quite. Give them some time to find a replacement for you.

It depends on what you are doing. I am vice president on our board and have quite a few responsibilities. (We actually have three vice presidents due to the huge work load of the position). I just had one of the other vice presidents step down because of a squabble at the school.

Honestly, I am not happy about being burdened with her workload as well as my own. Because the rest of us have the option of letting all her responsibilities go and programs not happen this year or we have to do those as well. (The same situation left us without a web designer).

My own duties are not getting done as well as I could do them because of the extra issues.

I am glad she just came out and said she wasn't going to do it anymore, BUT if she had found a replacement that would have helped a lot.

So my advice is to find a replacement and then resign!!

Situations change.
I think mature adults know this.
Don't keep this bottled up inside.
This is only Oct so you have 9 more months to get through and that's a long time to be over-extended.
Discuss your problem and tell PTA you will keep working with them until a replacement for you can be found.
You won't be leaving them high and dry but gracefully bowing-out.
If people hate you for that - then they weren't that mature in the first place and you don't need to care about how they wind themselves up.

I was on the PTA board in charge of volunteers. I was unable to do my job well and the previous mom in that position helped me. I limped along to finish the year. Everyone was understanding and remained friendly. The next year I continued to volunteer when I was able but not be on the board. Many were appreciative of what I could do.

Perhaps you could share your position with someone. Talk with the president and maybe the board and see what all of you come up with. Above all else you need to do what is best for yourself and your family.

Stick it out. Don't sign up for anything else!

If you are president, you can not quit without finding and training your own replacement. (or you can find someone to help you and make it a "co" position). If you are anything else, it shouldn't be that demanding on your time. I'm PTA treasurer, and on average, it's an additional 2 hours a week. This week is our big fundraiser count, so it will be an extra 7 hours.

The people that said the other board members wouldn't mind or wouldn't be real friends are crazy. If you have some kind of insanely demanding PTA and are already "staying up until 3 am working on PTA stuff" (quoted from another response), I can guarantee you the rest of the board members would be rightly upset to have to add to their own work load because you quit.

I was a PTA President at 2 different schools.

I suggest you find your replacement and then quit, telling them you found this other parent to take your spot. Remember dads and people from the community can be a member of the board.

Something almost identical happened to me this year! My part time job ended, and the one I've found to replace it requires a much greater time and energy commitment (though it's still part time). Coincidentally, I also have 3 boys (ages 10, 7 and 4). As soon as I found out about my new position, I told our president, and she was able to find someone to co-chair with me. So far it's working out wonderfully - I'm doing the administrative stuff, and she's the person that's able to be at the school when it's necessary. Maybe something like that would work for you too?

You are in your adjustment period right now. Any time there's a change in routine its stressful but really working 7 additional hours a week just needs you to tweak things a bit. Hang in there and change things up to fit your new schedule.Figure out what needs to be done on specific days and times and rework the flexible things in where you can.

Let them know that your hours have increased and you didn't realize the commitment on the PTA (they are notorious for not telling you what's involved!). Ask how to set up a committee for your largest projects and get an assistant chairperson for whatever you are handling. That spreads the work, helps you focus, and trains a new person to step into the role later on. That's how volunteer organizations get stronger - by mentoring new people. You can ask for a mentor in someone who did the job before (who may have left because it was too much but who may have time to advise and commiserate).

What is your PTA job? You may want to say you need to step back from x after y event and give them time to transition to someone new. Your job situation changed. That's reason enough. Paying job before PTA job.

I do not take on a role, like VP. But I step in where I can (like fundraisers) so you don't have to leave the PTA to downsize your role.